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[Lisa J T]

Hi ya,

I feel like I only ever come on here to moan but im in need of some advice.

So had a hysterectomy in January 2020 at the age of 36 which bought on menopause. Was not really told what to expect.

I have had so many symptoms ranging from dry vagina to hot sweats to anxeity.

I am on HRT patches but I still have so many server symptoms.

Today was a real real low for me... I have had a few mini breakdowns since the op where I feel like I am going to have a panic attack but managed to control it or I've had really bad anxeity and just cried and shut myself off from the world. The last couple of weeks I could feel my mood slipping so I started to distance myself from people and just focus on a day at a time thinking this will stop me having a full melt down. Well today I finished work at 7am and went and picked my daughter up and we went and had breakfast then I dropped her at summer school and I felt OK for the first time in weeks.... but by 3pm I was walking home from the shops and I had my very first full panic attack... I was such a mess and I was so scared as the thoughts going through my head was I just didn't want to do this no more... I picked up my phone to call the samatatians but hung up after 2 calls... I have them spent the rest of the evening crying and feeling ashamed that I even thought like that when I have 2 beautiful children depending on me


I am actually so so scared of my own brain. When I've spoken to the dr in the past they just say its to be expected worh what my body is going through and allow I have had suicide thoughts before I have never got to the point of how I was today!!

Am I meant to feel like this on Hrt??? Does it mean its not working?

Thank you

Lisa

[Dotty]

Hi. So sorry to hear you’re feeling so low. It sounds like you’re HRT is not at the right dosage. Can you tell us which HRT you are using ? Do you have any other symptoms ? xxx

[jaypo]

You definitely need to go back to the Dr and a different one at that,what you're experiencing is NOT what is to be expected. I've suffered with panic attacks and they are the pits,there are a lot of self help things online which you could look at until you speak to your GP

[Floo36]

Sounds like you are not on enough Estrogen yet.  I have had panic attacks over the last 2 years that would pass quickly and last month endured a 3 week long episode of constant panic, scared of everything, I have put them down to wild fluctuating Estrogen.  My menopause doctor said fluctuations can affect you more than low Estrogen. Can you increase the dose to see if it helps?

[Lisa J T]

Hello,

Thank you for your replies...

I am on 75mg on the patches... im wondering of its to high or to low... but this has happened when I was on the 50mg and even happened when I disnt use the patches for a while... so I just dont know

My symptoms include vagina dryness, anxeity, hot sweats, night sweats, panic attacks and weight gain. I have also been suffering with really bad heart burn while feeling low but not sure thats related.... I just feel like a completely different person...

I feel like I need some guidance through this and all I get is that its  normal!!!
Because of my age im going through this without my friends and as understanding as they are i feel I need someone one who has been through it to tell me im not going crazy!!

When the dr calls im not letting them off the phone until they help me

[sheila99]

Given the rest of your symptoms I'm another one who thinks you need to increase oestrogen. You should ask your doctor for topical oestrogen for your VA too. Anxiety was one of my worst symptoms, I didn't have panic attacks like you've had but it's completely gone with hrt. You can ask for a referral to a menopause clinic if your gp is unable to treat you properly.

[jaypo]

Hi again Lisa, I agree with Sheila,ask for a referral to a menopause clinic,all your symptoms are very familiar to the women on this site,we've all suffered with at least one of them,so no,you're definitely NOT going crazy

[VictoryV]

Hi Lisa,
You’ve just described exactly how I felt about 3 weeks ago, the distancing, being terrified of your own brain, thinking etc. You’re not mad, you’re carrying far more than you need to. I hope you get to a GP fast and get the right dosage.
You’ll be ok.

Sending hugs. Let us know how the apt goes.

Victoria.x

[Lisa J T]

Hi Victoria,

Sorry to hear that you went through this as well.

Did you speak to your dr? What was the outcome.

Thank you

Xx

[VictoryV]

Hi Lisa,

It was hell, I finally got a telephone appointment with my GP who prescribed 2 pumps of Oestrogel daily and 200mg of Utrogestan. I wasn’t told how to take the Utrogestan and the sticker on the box said daily which I think is an error as I’m peri. Everything I’ve read says take the Utrogestan on days 15 to 26 so that’s what I’ve decided to do.
Today is day 15 and I’m nervous about taking the Utrogestan because I feel so blinking FANTASTIC that I’m scared anything could change that! I don’t ever want to feel the despair I had 15 days ago. The Oestrogel has got rid of the anxiety (I didn’t know it was called this and referred to it as intense fear), doom and gloom depression, night sweats, hot flashes, back ache, need to wee twice in the night.

I got relief immediately, it has been improving since day 1. I’ve always had insomnia and still have but I know how to cope with that.
It’s very early days for me, I’m hoping it continues to work, if it doesn’t I’ll experiment with HRT until I find the right path as I’m not going back to how bad it got for anything.

I’m hoping you get same results. X

[Lisa J T]

Most pointless call with my dr... apparently what I'm experiencing is server menopause symptoms and they are putting me on one of the highest dose of HRT to see how I get on!! Wont test my levels and yet again said its all to be expected in menopause and because of my age it is going to be harder on my mind and body so basically I just have to suck it up and get on with it!!!

Feeling left let down and alone

[jaypo]

Lisa,that just isn't good enough in my humble opinion,can you asked to be referred to a meno clinic? Google and see if there is one near to you

[Lisa J T]

I have been looking but can't seem to find one... they have said to self refer to a wellbeing clinic for my mental health... trying to explain to them that I never suffered with this before my op and I feel I just need my estrogen levels sorted just got shrugged off!!

I am now going to ne on 100mg and my body now needs to get used to it all over again

[CLKD]

36 is young.  U should have been counselled prior to such major surgery regarding HRT requirements to protect heart and bones.

Some hospitals have dedicated menopause clinics - not a Gynae as they often don't know much about hormones!  It amazes me that women still aren't being given appropriate pre-op advice    Highest dose of what exactly?

I think that you need to ask your GP to refer you to a menopause clinic ASAP.  You should be referred on the NHS but waiting lists may be long.  Dr Louise Newsom's web-site is a good starting point!

Let us know how you get on.

[Lisa J T]

When I was told I was going to have the op they said counselling will be given but then the lost all my paper work for the funding so when it was all found I was rushed through for the op so I think it just got forgotten.

I cant even be bothered to call my dr back as I'm so upset but I know I need more help.

I'm going try the wellbeing number tomorrow I just feel like a fraud as I dont believe that my mental state is real and that its just because of my estrogen levels....

My life is fine so I feel really bad for feeling this low