Hi hotmama, I'm a very similar story to yours apart from the patch! I too suffered for years with all the usual horrible meno symptoms which have never really gone. Apparently we are the unlucky ones....
I am now 63, 10 years post meno, have been on a conti regime of 2 pumps oestrogel and 100mg utrogestan (orally) since last September, prescribed by my local menopause clinic. Also on Vagifem for VA. My hot flushes had mostly subsided from what they were before taking it, but still had the odd tingly warm moments!
2 months ago I decided to have a HRT break, as my boobs were very achy, burny and tender and was having some upper abdominal issues, just to see if it would make any difference. BUT the hot flushes of course came back after 2 weeks, along with feeling generally rubbish.
So I restarted on my gel and utrogestan again anyway 6 days ago, as my boobs and stomach seemed to have settled better during the break, but hot flushes and tingling waves seem to have just gone more intense in last few days after re-starting?? Waking up in the night with my nightie clinging and damp. (Crikey what's that all about??)
Maybe it's just the dreaded hormones re-jiggling again and probably yours have settled into a routine over the years - and now may need another tweak? Which patch are you on? I know you don't want to increase it really, but maybe try the next strength up for a little while just to see if it makes a difference? You can then reduce again?
I hope you manage to find some relief, but no natural supplements have ever worked for me over the years and believe me I tried them all.
It would appear some of us will need to be on HRT for life, as the flushes will never go?!!