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Menopause Matters magazine ISSUE 76 out now. (Summer issue, June 2024)

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Author Topic: Irrational Fears and a Message of Hope  (Read 9570 times)

Kathleen

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Irrational Fears and a Message of Hope
« on: June 16, 2017, 06:37:03 PM »

Hello ladies.

I understand that irrational fears can envelop us at this time but I thought I would pass on a  positive story that I heard today.

 In the past on MM ladies have posted about how they have become afraid to do certain things or go to particular places and I recall reading about a woman who had a fear of her washing machine and another who could no longer cook meals. Being afraid of crowds and going into shops was mentioned often and today I met a woman who had experienced exactly that during her menopause. She told me that for about two years she panicked whenever she had to go into a shop so she tried to avoid it as much as possible and ordering her groceries online was a saving grace. She didn't take HRT although she did say that she found evening primrose oil helpful. The reason that her story is so encouraging is that I met her in a shop, infact she is one of the cashiers and has been working there for a few years. Clearly her fears are now behind her and she has carried on with her life as if it never happened.

I thought I would pass this on so that anyone in the grip of these horrible feelings can be reassured that they do pass and we can emerge unscathed.

Wishing everyone well.

K.
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CLKD

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Re: Irrational Fears and a Message of Hope
« Reply #1 on: June 16, 2017, 07:03:20 PM »

 :thankyou:  as long as I don't feel sick I can take on the World.  If my gut lurches, I'm lost  :'(, hence the emergency pill.
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DaisyB

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Re: Irrational Fears and a Message of Hope
« Reply #2 on: June 16, 2017, 10:40:27 PM »

Kathleen that's a lovely wee story. I was just chatting to my sis tonight about the crazy week I've had and the terror of believing (after it was suggested to me ) that I had indeed symptoms similar to MS. Can't remember much of the following two days as i crashed and had no choice but to take diazepam- never ever had anything like this in my life. The terror is something I cannot actually expect others to understand unless you have experience of it. Now waiting for tests to be organised -  but anxiety has crawled back under it's rock and I am left wondering what the flip happened. Rang my husband from hotel tonight to wish him luck for captains day at golf tomorrow. It was last week!!! Ive missed another week through sheer terror. But hearing stories of women who have got through it is comforting - can't wait for that day  :)
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Kathleen

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Re: Irrational Fears and a Message of Hope
« Reply #3 on: June 17, 2017, 01:28:04 PM »

Hello Sparkle and DaisyB and thank you for your comments.

I know many of us can't wait for the day when our lives are no longer dominated by changing hormones, y'know a bit like being a bloke lol.
 During my time reading the forum and talking to other women I know irrational fears are commonplace and according to my trusty meno book it is due to a sense of unease caused by neuro transmitters registering oestrogen loss. My book also says that " it has been found that oestrogen prevents anxiety, which may explain why anxiety is such a dominant symptom of the menopause" and " menopausal women are actually suffering from natural tranquilizer withdrawal". Yep, think I can agree with all of that!

Wishing you well ladies inspite of it all.

K.
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CLKD

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Re: Irrational Fears and a Message of Hope
« Reply #4 on: June 17, 2017, 01:46:17 PM »

Could I have some 'natural tranquilliser'?  (and a dictionary  :-\ )

Terror really does cover how I feel when anxiety floors me. 
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Lizab

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Re: Irrational Fears and a Message of Hope
« Reply #5 on: June 17, 2017, 02:38:26 PM »

That's nice reassurance, Kathleen. Thank you! That makes so much sense too. A few occasions when anxiety was preventing me from going out, my husband asked what I was fearing. When I stopped to think about it I told him that I don't fear anything in particular but my body seemed to.
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CLKD

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Re: Irrational Fears and a Message of Hope
« Reply #6 on: June 17, 2017, 02:47:12 PM »

4 me it's physical .......... if I feel OK i.e. not anxious, I can cope.
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DaisyB

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Re: Irrational Fears and a Message of Hope
« Reply #7 on: June 17, 2017, 04:07:19 PM »

Kathleen - what's the book called?? :)
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Yammy1

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Re: Irrational Fears and a Message of Hope
« Reply #8 on: June 17, 2017, 04:20:19 PM »

Sitting reading this feeling sick and dizzy with anxiety, was fine when I woke this morning but as soon as I started to feel dizzy panic set in. Really am fed up with this whole meno thing :'(, just took a stemitil for dizziness so hopefully will kick in soon, hubby is talking to me about holidays for next spring and I can't see beyond next week, it makes me soooooo angry
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CLKD

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Re: Irrational Fears and a Message of Hope
« Reply #9 on: June 17, 2017, 04:21:35 PM »

How's your diet Yammy1? Another thread maybe?
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Yammy1

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Re: Irrational Fears and a Message of Hope
« Reply #10 on: June 17, 2017, 04:25:06 PM »

Diet is ok, I just can't seem to motivate myself, I think this being my first Father's Day since Dad passes in January is not helping  :'( :'( :'(
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Kathleen

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Re: Irrational Fears and a Message of Hope
« Reply #11 on: June 17, 2017, 07:00:35 PM »

Hello ladies.

The meno book I was referring to is called Menopause and is written by Dr Miriam Stoppard and published by Dorling Kindersley. Unfortunately it is now out of print but I'm sure other books on the subject are just as good providing they are written by someone suitably qualified.

Yammy 1 -  I'm so sorry for your loss but I completely understand your anger with the menopause.  I am furious  that hormonal problems have impacted my life so profoundly. Sending hugs to you.

Take care ladies.

K.
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Yammy1

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Re: Irrational Fears and a Message of Hope
« Reply #12 on: June 17, 2017, 07:35:00 PM »

Thank you Kathleen, sometimes it helps just venting your anger here with people who understand
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Julation

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Re: Irrational Fears and a Message of Hope
« Reply #13 on: June 17, 2017, 07:49:04 PM »

4 me it's physical .......... if I feel OK i.e. not anxious, I can cope.

Mine is physical too.  When it starts, I need my Ativan friend, nothing else works.

But I also know things will get better.  We wont stay like that forever.
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DaisyB

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Re: Irrational Fears and a Message of Hope
« Reply #14 on: June 17, 2017, 08:53:33 PM »

Thanks Kathleen xx
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