I'm so glad that what has helped me helps you BJ.
I saw both a councillor and a coach. The councillor I saw face to face as she lived near. She has a medical background, specialising in sexual issues. We explored the past which helped with understanding and putting things to rest. The coach was a chap, who was one of the contributors of one of the courses DH went on. We looked more to the present. I did a 3 month course by telephone as he is an American, but have had the privilege to meet him a few times, as by coincidence he lives near my son and comes over here. Both had the same message, just coming from different angles.
So much I learnt I would love to share, but one thing I did learn is that you only take on board what you are ready for. The rest goes over your head. I have reading matter that is part of my self care program. It's amazing how different things jump out at you when you reread stuff. I am so grateful, but I sought the help I needed when I was ready. Before I was so frightened of all the anger I was suppressing and of what I would find in myself if I looked too deeply. Now I have looked, I found someone worth getting to know. The coach told me he believes we all come into this world with beautiful soul, but experience shapes our behaviour. We are not defined by our behaviour; that's not who we really are. We can choose how we behave with self awareness.
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Topic: Trying to be a decent parent (Read 8171 times)