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[GypsyRoseLee]

Day 20:

Despite waking in the night and having the nasty ****les of anxiety, I managed to quickly get back to sleep. Which is progress of sorts. In the past there have been nights when I couldn't get back to sleep.

Woke early around 6, but this is the norm for me now since starting peri menopause. Felt quite jittery and anxious just lying there in bed so got up and felt a bit better.

But all day have felt on edge, anxious, unable to take pleasure in anything really. That lovely sensation of contentment is totally missing. Really unpleasant.

But, I could function although secretly miserable. It's horrible and draining having to fake smiles and force yourself to act like you're absolutely fine.

Really praying this is just a temporary dip while my body adjusts under the Pill. I can cope with the odd day, or even couple of days feeling like this. But it's the fear that it will last a week or more.

[GypsyRoseLee]

Day 21:

Had a bit of a struggle to get off to sleep as I was fighting feelings of panic/anxiety. But I did manage to drop off after about an hour.

Felt a little bit better when I woke up, but still very far from 'right'. I've been doing some reading and basically when I am in one of these dips my symptoms have a specific name which is dysphoria e.g. restless anxiety mixed with depression and an inability to take pleasure in anything.

So, soldiered on with dysphoria all day. Suffering with a nasty headache which paracetamol wasn't really shifting.

Got home from work and felt extremely tired, almost nodded off on the sofa which is most unlike me. Then around tea time I started to feel gradually better. No lightning fast mood change like I usually have. Just a gradual lightening of mood and the dysphoria lifting.

I feel quite a lot better this evening.

This is a very positive development because the dysphoria only lasted 2 days. And the last couple of times before that the dysphoria also only lasted a couple of days.

Before, when I went into a dysphoria dip it could last up to 11 days, but was more typically lasting about 6-7 days, which was crucifying.

Hopefully this is what the Pill is doing. Much shorter dysphoria dips and not as intense when they happen?

[GypsyRoseLee]

Also, still have brown spotting which has been constant now for about 2 weeks. Anyone know when it might go. I intend running the packets together. If that makes any difference?

[GypsyRoseLee]

Day 22 (yesterday):

Slept well, and barely any anxiety when I woke up. Felt much better and stronger. Relieved and pleased that the latest mood dip only lasted 2 days again. Phew.

Am definitely plauged by headaches though and getting a few spots, which I've never had since my early teens.

[SadLynda]

glad your sleep and mood is better, seems like we cant have everything then   We were having a chat about 'spots' on another part of the forum.

[Briony]

Spots could well just be a Levonorgestel side effect - hopefully will only be temporary. Otherwise good to hear things are going well. Will be interesting to see how it goes during the week you would have had a bleed. I've had a proper bleed this month - first in ages that needed more than a panty liner - and psychologically feel better than when I didn't bleed last month (had the blank pills but nothing came apart from random tears!). X

[pepperminty]

Hi GRL,

I think the spotting can go on for about 3 months and then it should settle if it doesn't you may need a different type of pill.

Keep gong it appears to be working!!

Pmintyxx

[GypsyRoseLee]

Day 23 (yesterday):

Didn't have any of that awful restless anxiety mixed with depression. But didn't feel all that great. Felt quite flat and despondant. Still getting headaches all the time unfortunately.

I wonder if the constant dose of progesterone is making me feel quite flat? Just can't really seem to get excited about anything or really take much pleasure in anything?

Appetite a but weird. Definitely reminds me of how I felt when pregnant. Hungry but tinged with queasiness and nothing tastes quite right. Think I'm sleeping more deeply at the moment too.

Still getting the brown spotting with 'bits' in. Nice!

[GypsyRoseLee]

Hi Briony

This should be the week where I should have had my bleed, but I've gone straight into the next pack so will have to see what happens. I do feel flat though.

Curious that you had a more proper bleed this time around and yet feel better for it. Have you decided which way to go for the new regime?

[GypsyRoseLee]

Thanks PM.

The spotting doesn't bother me too much, it's just an inconvenience really. How are you feeling at the moment?

[Briony]

Hi Briony

This should be the week where I should have had my bleed, but I've gone straight into the next pack so will have to see what happens. I do feel flat though.

Curious that you had a more proper bleed this time around and yet feel better for it. Have you decided which way to go for the new regime?

I have to say I feel better for a bleed - rather than flat as I usually feel when I 'should' be bleeding, even though I have had no control over whether the bleed came.

Am hoping to see my own GP when she's back from her hols re taking the pill. DOnt hold out much hope, but got nothing to lose x

[pepperminty]

Hi GRL,

I am a bit crap really , but that is the throat infection. I am getting all the signs of a period a week earlier than I should again , so no doubt it will last another 10 days , so I will be pleased when I go on the pill and that all stops = hopefully !!!

Hopefully you will even out on the pill soon.

Pminty xx

[GypsyRoseLee]

I think I might have mentioned this earlier, but couldn't you sign some sort of waiver absolving your GP of any culpability?

Day 24:

Slept very well. Didn't actually wake until 7.15 which is just unheard of this last year. I definitely think the daily prog in the Pill sedates you more. This morning I just wanted to lie quietly in bed which is most unlike me. But I woke with yet another nasty headache.

Moodwise I've been alright, I suppose? Not good and not bad either. If I was going to describe myself as a colour then I'd be a slightly dingy looking beige. I feel quite flat inside and can't seem to feel any excitement. Laughing and giggling is out of reach. I can just about manage a smile at a push.

Brown spotting is heavier today with some fresh blood in it. This is really weird because I went straight on to my next pack without a break. So theoretically I shouldn't get a withdrawal bleed. But looks like I am still going to get one anyway!

Can my own hormones still be so strong to overide the Pill?

[GypsyRoseLee]

Oh poor you, I read you had a nasty throat infection. I always find gargling with salt water is very soothing and anti bacterial. Plus lots of fresh lemon juice mixed with hot water and some good quality honey.

If your nose is bunged up then sleeping with an extra pillow helps too.

I hope the Pill stops these overly long period of yours. Though having said that I have run 2 packs together but looks like I'm still going to get a withdrawal bleed anyway, which really surprises me!

[Hurdity]

Hi GypsyRoseLee

You mentioned about using the Pill back to back - surely this isn't advised? Has your doc said it's OK - remembering that GPs may not necessarily know the answer. I did read that it was OK for a month or two to  miss a period but not long term. I mean if a bleed is expected each month during the Pill free days and you don't have one then what happens to the lining? Surely the expectation is that despite the high doses of progestogen there is still some build up which must be shed? I am absolutely no expert on the Pill ( in fact quite the opposite!) but just seems logical to me. Also I did read it is not advised except under supervision and perhaps you are confident about this?

Taking pill packs back-to-back

For monophasic combined pills (pills all the same colour and with the same level of hormones), it is normally fine to start a new pack of pills straight after your last one – for example, if you want to delay your period for a holiday.

However, avoid taking more than two packs together unless advised to by a doctor or nurse. This is because you may have breakthrough bleeding as the womb lining sheds slightly. Some women find they feel bloated if they run several packs of the pill together.

http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/contraception-guide/pages/combined-contraceptive-pill.aspx

Sorry really can't advise re the spotting - maybe try Musmnet as well as this forum as there will be lots of women doing this with much experience re the Pill.

Hope your moods stabilise and improve.

Hurdity x