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[GypsyRoseLee]

I'm on Day 3 of my first full HRT cycle (started wearing a patch mid cycle, nearly 3 weeks ago). Finished my first 12 days of Utro last Wednesday, and my bleed started on Saturday. For the second half of my Utro phase I slept really well and for the last 9 days my peri symptoms seemed to have pretty much disappeared. Felt calm and balanced inside. And last Thursday (second day after stopping Utro) I felt so chilled and relaxed I could have been stoned 

Hooray for HRT I thought.

But Saturday night (same day my bleed started) I started to feel a bit on edge and jittery again, but slept okay. Yesterday I didn't feel nearly as good as I have been doing over the last couple of weeks. I felt a bit anxious, my mood was quite low and felt agitated.

Then last night was dreadful. Felt tired at bed time but couldn't drop off to sleep. Kept getting little adrenaline type surges which jolted me awake. Finally managed to drop off at about 3am? But even then sleep was very poor with bizarre dreams.

Feel like a wet rag today, and so drained 

I just DON'T understand what is going on??? I thought the progestone part of the cycle was meant to be the danger time for peri symptoms? Yet here I am, haven't taken the Utro for 6 days now, just wearing my patch and I get insomnia and the jittery, low moods and anxiety again.

This does NOT bode well for when we go on holiday next month, and I am really worried. I will be at precisely this point in my cycle next month, and I have to do a lot of quite complicated travelling to the airport (alone). A combination of taxi, train then the tube. God knows how I will cope if I'm like this 

[Dancinggirl]

Hi GypsyRoseLee
If you are still peri meno then your own hormones will still be having an influence so fluctuations in mood etc is to be expected.  You've only just started using HRT so over the next few months things should settle a bit more as the HRT takes more control. What you are describing is quite normal PMT type symptoms really and I think because you suffer with anxiety you are analysing everything too much and perhaps need to do some Mindful Meditation and take each day as it comes  - then gradually you will relax.  We can't expect to feel good every day - HRT can only do so much, it's not a cure all.  DG x

[Galadriel]

Hi GypsyRoseLee,

I had similar experiences when I first started my current HRT. I'm peri and using 25mcg Estradot (now on my butt cheeks instead of tummy - I get a steadier release on tougher skin!) and 10mg MPA for 12 days. I sleep much better during the MPA phase, and like you, I'm much more chillaxed. I usually feel a bit crappy during the withdrawal bleed but pick up about a week later. This is when I know my own hormones are hiding under a rock so I'm running on HRT only.

When they join in with the HRT I can be up and down like a yoyo. 

I use a Yoga Nidra meditation to help with the early morning wakening/ sleep difficulties and I try hard not to get knicker-knotted about it as this makes everything worse. Of course, this is easier said than done sometimes. As DG says - overanalysis with only make the anxiety worse. Take it one day at a time. Be glad when the day is good, and remember the good days when things are not going quite how we'd like them to go.

I also use Aveda Blue Oil on tense spots or just sniff it when I'm feeling a bit too wired... it does help.

Galadriel x

[GypsyRoseLee]

Thanks dancingirl.

This jitteriness/anxiety and disturbed sleep is identical to how I was during my period before I started HRT. So that makes sense. I think I was assuming that the HRT would knock all that straight on the head very quickly.

[GypsyRoseLee]

Thanks Galadriel.

I am using Estradot 25mg too!

I am.on day 3 of my withdrawal bleed so that ties in with what you say about feeling ropey during your bleed too. Also for the last few months prior to HRT my symptoms were worse during my period too.

If being on the progestone phase makes you feel better and more chilled, could you not wear a combined patch all month? Or wear a patch and take 100mg of Utro for 26 days?

I was still having periods before starting HRT so assumed it would have to be cyclical?

[dazned]

I too would have thought if you were still having periods before hrt you do need to take it cyclical.

[GypsyRoseLee]

Galadriel when you say 'you feel crap because your hormones are hiding under a rock and you're running on HRT only' is this during your withdrawal bleed?

[Galadriel]

Yes it is. I think it's the withdrawal of MPA that might be responsible... then a few days later I am back to whatever passes for normal

As I was still having periods prior to starting HRT, the cyclical route is best - more control over when the bleed happens. For continuous combined HRT I would need to have stopped periods for a whole year. There's actually no serious reason to not use continuous combined at my stage but the risk of breakthrough bleeding is higher... it would give me the heebiegeebies so I'm happy with cyclical... it's the best balance for me for now.

Hope this makes sense.

Galadriel x

[GypsyRoseLee]

Thanks, that makes sense. I don't think it a coincidence that last month the day my period started my mood plummeted and I couldn't sleep. I went on to fell quite dreadful for the next 2.5 weeks before mood began to rise then I started HRT a couple of days later anyway.

How long before your moods stabilised a bit more on HRT?

I'm only on Estradot 25mg. Wonder if I need a higher dose if my mood can still dip during my withdrawal bleed?

[Greenfields]

Just to say a tip an aromatherapist gave me years ago has helped me in the past with travel (I don't travel well).

She suggested that I use a relaxing blend of essential oils in my bath before I travel (use them regularly before my trip). Then when I travel, to put the same blend of oils on a hankie or tissue so that I could sniff it when I felt stressed. And then when I got to my new location, to use the same essential oil blend in a bath and also take a scented hankie or tissue with me to bed. It definitely helped to make me feel more grounded and at home.

At the time I knew her (this is some years ago in Canada) she was selling a small vial of relaxation essential oils (blend). I'm guessing that maybe Neals Yard or Tisserand might sell something similar?  I've also used Neroil in the past which is an essential oil that's supposed to be good. As are Geranium (for balancing), Clary Sage (I think it's a sedative), and Lavender ... but don't quote me on this because I'm pulling this out of my memory! But there should be some information on the Internet on them somewhere. 

[GypsyRoseLee]

Thank you Greenfields. I love aromatherapy and will give that a go.

[Hurdity]

Thanks dancingirl.

This jitteriness/anxiety and disturbed sleep is identical to how I was during my period before I started HRT. So that makes sense. I think I was assuming that the HRT would knock all that straight on the head very quickly.

Hi GypsyRoseLee

Just to add the the levels of oestrogen etc in HRT are not high enough to suppress the natural cycle hence women get weird feelings sometimes due to own cycle breaking through.

if you wanted to suppress your cycle you would need to take BCP and the only one that has bio-identical oestrogen ( I understand) is Qlara. Of course if you take this you also have to take very high (synthetic) progestogen doses for part of  the month too. However you would avoid much of the mood swings and dips -I think - you would need to check with someone who takes it and who is peri!  There was someone on here who started this, not sure how she's doing?

Hurdity  x

[GypsyRoseLee]

Thanks for replying Hurdity.

I naively thought that being in HRT, especially the oestrogen would make me feel as contented and happy (all the time) as I used to do around ovulation? I guess that was rather stupid of me.

I just want my mood to be nice and even again. None of these huge ups and downs. My consultant assured me that wearing a patch would 'make me feel so much better'.

But that's no good if I only feel much better for a few days here and there. I was hoping to feel consistently much better for the majority of the whole month.

I know I have only been on HRT for nearly 3 weeks so it's very early days. But I'm only on Estradot 25mg, so wondering if it's enough?

[Dancinggirl]

GypsyRoseLee - it is very early days so you do need to give things more time.  As you get deeper into menopause you may need some extra oestrogen but I think you just need to be a patient as this stage. 
Don't expect to feel good all the time but celebrate feeling better for more of the time. DG x

[GypsyRoseLee]

That's sensible advice Dancinggirl 

I know it's very early days with HRT. Let's hope that over the next couple of months I get far more good days than bad. I do keep a mood diary and for the last week have rated each day Good/Medium/Poor/Bad.

I've had 4 Good, 2 Medium and yesterday was 'Poor' due to my insomnia the night before so I felt physically very drained and shaky all day (but not as psychologically low as I have felt on other 'after-insomnia' days pre HRT).

I will keep a check. Hopefully as HRT settles in I will get lots more 'Good' days. But I still got quite a few Good days pre HRT.

I suppose another way to look at it is, even if I don't get more Good days while on HRT, do I get as many Poor/Bad days as I did pre HRT?

I guess I am just very surprised that I suddenly didn't feel much, much better the moment I stopped taking the Utro and was just absorbing oestrogen. On here oestrogen gets touted as a magic elixir, so you sort of expect magical results 

I see my consultant in 3 weeks, so will be interesting to chat to her. When she first offered me HRT last year she mentioned 'slapping a 100mg patch on you, and you will feel sooooooo much better' (that is how she said it, she is quite theatrical). Which is why I was wondering if my 25mg wasn't enough?