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[Chaotic]

Well,have been quietly suffering for a few years now,I am almost 48,I reckon it all started a good few years ago,as many as 5i would say but only now am I realising how bad this blooming part of my life is and going to get. 
I have been reading quite a bit on here after having it recommended by my new doc and I see that there are people with much worse problems than myself.
I have all the usual symptoms,the flushings,the period problems,the aches in joints and muscles,some respiratory issues,weight gain,the diminishing sex life- all these I can cope with but oh my the emotional side,the feeling of no confidence any more,the feeling of being worthless in this life-what is it all for,why am I even on this earth etc,the rollercoaster of emotions,tears,tears and did I mention tears??I read about irritability also-yep,have that,in fact I now realise how often I have been thinking things and never expressed them and now the thoughts are coming out as words,I have called people some terrible names,said some terrible things and all day long I keep thinking WTF-normally I can keep all this inside but I just can't now-is this all part of the menopause??I have also found some fears that I have never ever had,a sudden feeling of panic when driving over large bridges-I have never been scared of heights,the opposite in fact-I have always been a daredevil and now I get terrible panic attacks when I drive over one-what the heck is going on? I do feel depressed,I went to doc and just couldn't bring myself to talk about that side of all of this as I will just start bubbling and I don't know if I will be able to stop myself from becoming a stereotypical hysterical wreck.All advice is welcome.I have tried the black cohosh,the serenity cream,diet changes and these feelings are still with me and that is my biggest worry-that these feelings won't leave me.

[Rowan]

Chaotic please pluck up the courage to talk to your doctor, you are in the peri menopause , you said your new doctor recommended MM so he must know that your hormones are in an upheaval. Tell him what you have said in your post and ask his advise.

My OH has a fear of driving over bridges has had for years, it is a common fear for men and women.

http://www.ehow.co.uk/how_5295340_overcome-fear-driving-over-bridges.html 

[CLKD]

  ........

[Aethelede]

Hi Chaotic,

Welcome to the forum
Maybe your doctor is nudging you towards considering HRT as a lot of ladies here have benefitted from it. (Although I don't know why they wouldn't just say it at your appointment!) I am 52 and two months into HRT treatment (Femseven Sequi patches) and things have improved a lot on the flushes/night sweats/insomnia front and that has an impact on how I feel during the day. So there is light at the end of the tunnel after a few years of similar symptoms to yourself.

One of the many things learned from this forum is that at your age there is thought to be little risk in using HRT as you are just replacing hormones your body should be making naturally. Maybe one day it will be proved once and for all that there is little risk at any age! My hubby's doctor doesn't seem concerned at keeping him on high bp meds for the rest of his life and they are definitely not natural!

Anyway, have a good read of this site. It might be worth mentioning HRT to your doctor to see if it would suit you. Sometimes knowing you aren't alone helps as well

[carolinec]

Hi Chaotic - I am a replica of you....I have been prescribed HRT evorel 50mcg just for a few days prior to my period..... You should have a chat with your doctor....

[Chaotic]

Thanks guys,I know what is holding me back is the emotional side of it,my doc is very understanding,I live very rurally and the surgery is so small,I know I will be a blubbing wreck,heck,even thinking about it makes me teary.Sleepless nights- I was blaming doing nightshift for so many years a while back but now it is the hot flushes,am going to see doc again and tell her everything this time.I think for my own sanity it may help.
 

[Alyson]

I am just going to bed (in Western Canada) but wanted to send you a big hug for finding the courage to ask for help.  You are not alone! I finally told my GP at Christmas about the weird (to me) fears that were developing (like driving in the dark). It was hard. I felt ashamed (though I know there is nothing to be ashamed  of) to admit these particular symptoms, but she (and the endocrinologist) confirmed the fears/anxiety are par for the course. Lucky us!  The more I research hormonal anxiety the better I feel.  One site that has helped me is Super Better originally developed for chronic pain.  Another resource that has helped a ton is the Anxiety and Phobia Workbook by Edmund Bourne.  I am still sorting out the medication side with my doctor.  At this point, I am pretty much willing to give anything a trial. Hang in there!