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[Nik2502]

Hi

No plan. I’ve got so much swirling round in my head, it’s hard to even think straight.
I’ll try and stay on the increased dose of oestrogen and see how I get on.  I’ve probably fiddled with it too much recently :-(
I’m so impatient I just want to feel better.

Thank you x

[Katie1980B]

Hi

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I can absolutely sympathise as I too have reoccurring bouts of falling into an anxiety hole. Mine is always triggered by a change to my hrt, and it takes about 4-6 weeks to regulate my system again, and each and every time I convince myself that the worst is coming.

I am also a bigger lady, and my weight has not been a problem in getting hrt, so if you’re having problems with a prescription, demand to see someone else.

In terms of mental health, the things I have found helpful are the following:
- I use an app called “Dare”. During my worst panic attacks where I’ve literally been in a heap on the floor crying and gasping for breath, this app has helped me calm down and regulate my breathing. I was never one for CBT type stuff, but this has helped me during my worst.
- Exercise. I know, I know…and I don’t want to be “that person”, but genuinely, exercise has helped me. I do yoga, walk on a treadmill, and bike machine. I do all of this purely for my mental health…it isn’t a fitness thing for me. I’m fat, and I’m ok with that. It bleeds off the anxiety energy, and helps me sleep better. It also forces me to make time for myself, which I am terrible at.
- Vitamins. I take magnesium in the evening before bed, and a multivitamin gummy after lunch. These have helped me with a lot of stuff and how I’m feeling in myself. I take the chewy vites kids multi, as it has B12 and D included.
Time - this will pass. This is easy for me to say, as I am only just coming out of my hole which has lasted about 4 weeks, but I promise it will pass. You need to find time for you. Do your breathing, work with your anxiety, not against it, and it will disappear.

Sending you positive vibes x

[Penguin]

If in 6 weeks or so you don't feel better on the higher estrogen dose, I'd really be wondering about whether the dose is too high. I know you said you're a poor absorber, but levels fluctuate so dramatically during peri that you could well have been tested on a low day. For example, a couple of years ago I paid privately for testing, and they tested I think 10-12 points in my cycle. While the first half of my cycle was a normal increase, in the luteal phase I had massive (right up into the red zone) spikes of super high estrogen on a number of random days which then dipped really low. So I am not convinced that one off blood tests are the best indicator and you could well have gone too high with the 150.

Also meant to add that Venlafaxine is for anxiety as well as depression and is also considered a non hormonal treatment for hot flushes. However, it could well be that it isn't one suitable for you for genetic reasons (something I'm learning about re myself in relation to a different antidepressant atm). How slow did you try to taper? If your GP knows how hard it is for you to taper, they could provide a liquid form of the drug which you can then reduce a couple of mls at a time. Stabilising at that dose for a month then reducing further. It may take ages but it is shown to reduce withdrawal side effects a lot. If your GP isn't capable of managing the taper, then ask them to refer you to someone who can, ie a mental health practitioner. This is possible, I do believe that! I am seeing a psychiatrist in April (privately as my GP isn't helpful in this regard) and plan to do a slow taper this way as I am super sensitive to any changes. But I did look online and antidepressants are available in liquid form so I'm sure this is something you could get if you made a convincing case.

Finally, I just wanted to say I hear you and really empathise re the intrusive thoughts, I get them too and it is awful. Please look up EFT, maybe watch the full length documentary on YouTube called The Tapping Solution. Two rounds of tapping has recently helped me dial down the notch a little. The documentary is very thought provoking and you follow a number of people through the process, it is really remarkable in the way it releases things that your body / brain is holding.

Take care
Penguin x