I tried taking utrogestan vaginally to try to avoid being suddenly thrown into a suicidal state, I found it the best one I've been allowed (better than norethisterone, cyclogest, levenorgesterol or provera, in order from least bad to absolutely the worst there).
The problem is this, the irritation from inserting utrogestan vaginally is another side effect I just can't tolerate, it drives me crazy all that itching!
I tried rectally, a bit better but such a faff when only the first box came with applicators and I'm not reusing rectally, I mean come on, no way would a man have to wash shit off a stick every day to reuse it on the next.
I've got oestrogel now and it works, so I revisited the progesterones just in case they are better than they used to be, as my GP is convinced of. I honestly think the woman believes I don't know what I'm talking about, the feeling is entirely mutual.
Yesterday I forgot to take my oestrogel (3 pumps) had the best time last night under the covers with hubbie, these products kill my libido, so was good to feel some back,
![Wink ;)](https://www.menopausematters.co.uk/forum/Smileys/extended/wink.gif)
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Long story short is I'm giving up oestrogel because while it's good, I survived peri plus the first couple of years postmeno before finally being allowed it for a trial this year. It's not worth the progestogen side effect of going from a normal and happy life to suddenly suicidal and listing to myself the reasons I must not slit my wrists or hang myself from the door. I'm afraid it could happen, I can be impulsive under that progestogen influence. I think the reason my GP dismisses the threat of suicide as not a risk
they need to consider is because that would be my doing not theirs, y'know?
Refreshing to see a thread where it's not being tidily brushed under the rug. We will not be the only ones, but we get shut up and shut down quickly for speaking the truth (to egos with a little power).