Hi Magoo! Welcome to you
Your post could have been written by me, and probably a lot of other women on this forum. It can feel very very overwhelming with the physical and mental health sides of perimenopause both causing such chaos. Honestly, I assure you you are not alone. I get how you feel as will others.
Firstly, so you want to address the symptoms with hrt that can help? Not every woman wants to go down this route of course, there is a section on alternatives to hrt. But as CLKD suggests, do browse around on here at your options. There is anti anxiety medication that you may want to think about, but I think that if you are thinking of hrt, just do one thing at a time so your body gets settled and you can identify which bit is working for you.
The talking with others can be tough. You are not under any obligation to tell anyone about any aspect of your health unless you want to! Your body, your mind.
If you are employed maybe they have menopause support in the workplace if you feel you wish to advise them.
I soon learned who to talk to and who not to. My husband had no option as I felt like I had been hit by a bus and my moods were totally out of control, and it took me weeks to realise all my symptoms was due to perimenopause. I thought I was having a breakdown of going mad. Honestly.😠. Some people will have negative attitudes and respond in a jokey manner. I avoid them. It's no joke. Some women will never understand as everyone's experience is different, some almost don't realise they are post menopausal as they are relatively symptom free. I have a special name for them, but am too polite to share it...
Everyone on here is so supportive, use this forum as much as you need even if a question may sound daft or need a bit of a bit on a bad day.
There is a post,I think called advice for husband's ( and others!) Which may help those around you understand how you feel. Remember, you didn't choose this, but you can get help and support in different forms.
For me personally what do I celebrate? No more physical bleeds due to mirena coil, and whilst peri and stuff in my life has brought me to my lowest year ever, it has now made me realise how strong I am. and to seek out and accept help when it is genuinely offered.
Women are simply amazing. That includes you too. X