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[Nas]

Sending empathy and support to all those who are suffering.

Somehow we need to accept the new “ normal” as hard as it can be. For me, it’s almost like a bereavement; mourning the loss of the person I once was.

Dorothy, none of this is your fault, you didn’t choose this way of life.  Some of us are dealt a crap set of cards and that’s tough to accept. You can easily become resentful of well people who are oblivious to the suffering of others.

Can you think of any small steps which you could take to make life better for yourself? Hrt might improve things for you physically and mentally ?

Hugs to you x

[CapriCapri]

I am glad for those who do feel like their old selves again.  I have been 9 months on the Oestrogel and Utrogestan combination (gel does has been adjusted a bit) but I still feel............discombobulated.  Just not right and not happy about the way forward but lacking the exact words to say exactly why. 

[TM73!]

Sadly no. I don’t feel at all like my old self. Numerous symptoms and the impossibility of losing weight around my middle, no matter what I do, has taken its toll. All these bloody celebrities taking HRT and saying they feel like teenagers is also enough to make me weep.

[Dorothy Gale]

Completely agree with you regarding the celebrities. So misleading.

If ladies only ever had listened to them...and had no other HRT info or insight........I think alot of women would be mightily disappointed that its not the silver bullet for us all!

But obvs it's amazing if it is life transforming for you x

[AmandaJR]

I’m reluctantly saying that I feel back to normal, finally. It’s taken two years of trialling HRT but I think I’m ‘normal’ now.
GP’s tried to diagnose CFS/ME/FIBRO but the tests didn’t add up. I’m scared to admit I feel like I’m ok  in case I go into nutter mode!
Testosterone and a huge dose of estrogen /progesterone/ magnesium, vitD,folate, iron all supported me but I’m terrified to return to the fatigue/ anxiety/despair I had.

I was suicidal. Overnight.

I want to hug all ladies who are still suffering. I don’t advise throwing all at it like I did but DON’T GIVE IN. Do what you feel needs to be done to get well,

Love to you all.

[Flossieteacake]

I’m reluctantly saying that I feel back to normal, finally. It’s taken two years of trialling HRT but I think I’m ‘normal’ now.
GP’s tried to diagnose CFS/ME/FIBRO but the tests didn’t add up. I’m scared to admit I feel like I’m ok  in case I go into nutter mode!
Testosterone and a huge dose of estrogen /progesterone/ magnesium, vitD,folate, iron all supported me but I’m terrified to return to the fatigue/ anxiety/despair I had.

I was suicidal. Overnight.

I want to hug all ladies who are still suffering. I don’t advise throwing all at it like I did but DON’T GIVE IN. Do what you feel needs to be done to get well,

Love to you all.

Hello AmandaJR and welcome to the forum. It is wonderful to hear you are in a good place now.

[SarahT]

Hi Amanda, welcome.

I still don't really understand why peri and memo are just so hard for some women more than others. Well.done on getting where you are now. Like you after many ups and downs and tweaks of hrt I think I am as stable as I can be, hormone wise, albeit knowing peri does fluctuate hormone levels. I went on a high dose to suppress ovulation, I think it isn't quite there but the severe moods are down to mostly cyclical pms. For the first time in my life I also had suicidal thoughts. Not me, so scary, hormones were the cause.

But I also feel a bit tentative, vulnerable that the stability will not last. As someone said previously, is losing confidence in our own body.

Thanks for caring for others who are going through it all a hug back to you too.

[AmandaJR]

Thanks for a lovely welcome ladies.
Totally agree with everything you’ve written Sarah, I think the fear/ vulnerability held me back for a long time, I still have it but thankfully it’s hugely decreased.
I am still utterly confused about how it happened, I went to bed as usual and woke up in utter terror. Thought I’d gone mad, didn’t want anybody to know so hid away. Took 3 months to work out it was perimenopause, I’d never heard of it! I’ve found loads of other women who didn’t know either, this is a crying shame, I want a huge sticker for the side of my car saying something like plan 4 perimenopause ASAP!

I did the same as you by suppressing ovulation but to be honest don’t know what worked as I changed so much stuff out of desperation, it’s impossible to know.

You’re so right about losing body confidence on top of mental confidence too, it will come back. The much repeated ‘you must wait (suffer!) for 3 months’ line the GP constantly recited was true for my confidence, it took 3 months of feeling ok for me to trust that I was going to recover.

I’m so glad I’ve found this forum, not had a happy cry for years! X

[Penguin]

That is so true AmandaJR
 I was just saying to my husband this morning that I need to get used to the new 'normal' which, for me, is predictably unpredictable! I never saw this coming. My mum passed before I knew I was in peri and I never got to ask her about her menopause. She never ever talked about it though, but a number of things she suffered with (dryness,  overheating, reflux) I can look back and see were now probably menopause. My 9 year old daughter already knows about hormones in an age appropriate way, both puberty and menopause ones. I don't want anyone else to be as unprepared as I was for all of this!!!

[AmandaJR]

Hi Penguin, I love your predictably unpredictable new normal!
I tried to talk to my mum about her menopause and got told it’s natural, walk in the park and that she was sick of it being all over the TV! I rewound and said I probably had a touch of Covid and haven’t mentioned it since.
It’s great that you talk to your daughter about hormones, I’ve told mine to plan her career around it just in case!

[Penguin]

Yes indeed! My daughter refers to my menopause brain now and asks me if I've put my gel on if I am too grumpy 🤣. Both children also know when I'm in the progrsterone phase as I fart a lot more , so we do laugh about that 🙈
The impression I got from my mum (and yet I don't remember her ever actually saying this!) is that it's a few hot flushes and your periods stop 🤷‍♂️. She was also an older mother so went through it in the days when people were more scared of hrt and cancer, so I think she'd have suffered in silence regardless.