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Author Topic: Can’t be bothered/loss of motivation  (Read 2047 times)

Fizwhizz

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Can’t be bothered/loss of motivation
« on: May 08, 2023, 12:48:53 PM »

Hi ladies,

Is can’t be bothered ness /lack of motivation a menopause thing or a depression thing or both please?

I’m pretty sure I’m post menopausal, 54 but with Mirena so no bleeds. I’ve been on HRT (private treatment so it’s not a typical dose etc - not really sure if it’s working or worth the expense tbh) and not too many physical symptoms but complete lack oomph, motivation, mojo and am really struggling at the moment. I had a child late, at 40, so I need to find a better way to cope and keep going but I can’t help wondering if this flat, withdrawn, can’t be bothered with anyone/thing feeling is actually nature’s way and it’s part of ageing. It’s like being slowly cancelled….🙈

I used to be a doer and could force myself to tackle most things now I just can’t seem to. It doesn’t help that most of the things I need to be doing are boring domestic chores but as another poster on here said ‘someone still needs to do the dishes’!

Thanks everyone.

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sheila99

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Re: Can’t be bothered/loss of motivation
« Reply #1 on: May 08, 2023, 01:00:34 PM »

Both could cause it. What hrt are you on? Does it include testosterone? How is you libido? Testosterone helped with my motivation but my libido was zero.
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Fizwhizz

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Re: Can’t be bothered/loss of motivation
« Reply #2 on: May 08, 2023, 01:09:27 PM »

I’m on DHEA tablets, progesterone tablets and compounded estradol and estradiol cream. Testosterone hasn’t been mentioned. I think the DHEA is supposed to help be converted into testosterone but no idea if it is in my case. The lack of physical symptoms might show HRT is helpful but it’s not helping my low mood/lack of motivation. I don’t know whether to ditch the private treatment and try something else via the NHS or if I need anti depressants or if this is just how I’m supposed to feel at my age. My libido disappeared post baby and I mainly kept up with the private treatment because seeing a GP during Covid was difficult and there were so many HRT supply issues too. I’m confused dot com with it all….
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Flossieteacake

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Re: Can’t be bothered/loss of motivation
« Reply #3 on: May 08, 2023, 01:21:15 PM »

Fizzwhizz, I am so sorry to hear how low you are feeling. Low mood or depression is not something we should ever have to put up with and there are things that can help it. I am unfamiliar with the HRT you are taking but I know for some women an increase in oestrogen can help with low mood. I can understand why you went private as it really is so difficult to get an NHS appointment. Perhaps it would help to ask for a referral to a meno clinic via your GP in just so you are on the waiting list.

I am sure somebody who knows about the HRT you are taking will be along soon to advise you.
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CLKD

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Re: Can’t be bothered/loss of motivation
« Reply #4 on: May 08, 2023, 01:39:35 PM »

Low VitD levels can cause similar symptoms. 
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HellsBells

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Re: Can’t be bothered/loss of motivation
« Reply #5 on: May 08, 2023, 01:47:33 PM »

'It's like being slowly cancelled' Oh my goodness I REALLY hear that....you have nailed it. I feel it's one step forward and two back. And has been for years. I have so much to be thankful for but overall I feel like an old nag of a horse who just needs shooting.
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Losingtheplot

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Re: Can’t be bothered/loss of motivation
« Reply #6 on: May 08, 2023, 02:03:39 PM »

Hi ladies,

Is can’t be bothered ness /lack of motivation a menopause thing or a depression thing or both please?

I’m pretty sure I’m post menopausal, 54 but with Mirena so no bleeds. I’ve been on HRT (private treatment so it’s not a typical dose etc - not really sure if it’s working or worth the expense tbh) and not too many physical symptoms but complete lack oomph, motivation, mojo and am really struggling at the moment. I had a child late, at 40, so I need to find a better way to cope and keep going but I can’t help wondering if this flat, withdrawn, can’t be bothered with anyone/thing feeling is actually nature’s way and it’s part of ageing. It’s like being slowly cancelled….🙈

I used to be a doer and could force myself to tackle most things now I just can’t seem to. It doesn’t help that most of the things I need to be doing are boring domestic chores but as another poster on here said ‘someone still needs to do the dishes’!

Thanks everyone.

I can completely relate to this hunni big hugs its just awful have felt like this for a while past few years and more as time has gone on x
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Booroo

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Re: Can’t be bothered/loss of motivation
« Reply #7 on: May 08, 2023, 02:55:14 PM »

Hi ladies,

Is can’t be bothered ness /lack of motivation a menopause thing or a depression thing or both please?

I’m pretty sure I’m post menopausal, 54 but with Mirena so no bleeds. I’ve been on HRT (private treatment so it’s not a typical dose etc - not really sure if it’s working or worth the expense tbh) and not too many physical symptoms but complete lack oomph, motivation, mojo and am really struggling at the moment. I had a child late, at 40, so I need to find a better way to cope and keep going but I can’t help wondering if this flat, withdrawn, can’t be bothered with anyone/thing feeling is actually nature’s way and it’s part of ageing. It’s like being slowly cancelled….🙈

I used to be a doer and could force myself to tackle most things now I just can’t seem to. It doesn’t help that most of the things I need to be doing are boring domestic chores but as another poster on here said ‘someone still needs to do the dishes’!

Thanks everyone.

I can completely relate to this hunni big hugs its just awful have felt like this for a while past few years and more as time has gone on x


Think th3 way everything is in life is making lots of us peed off can’t b assed etc tired don’t think it’s all hormones you know x
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vintagefiend

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Re: Can’t be bothered/loss of motivation
« Reply #8 on: May 09, 2023, 01:43:15 PM »

totally get where you're coming from- it's so frustrating because you *know* it's not you. I'm just knackered and i seem to have lost the brief ability i had to gain anything positive from oestrogen therapy in terms of mood/energy. moreover, i actually feel worse on it moodwise than off it. I'm on a tiny amount and it's awful- so shabby! I'd honestly consider giving up but my joints start aching when i go off it and that frightens me.

HOWEVER, as previous posters have suggested, it might be that testosterone could do with being in the mix and I am definitely going to try this. I have tried it before and it ran amok but i figured out that that was due to my being overweight and general unhealthiness!! so i'm working towards being able to try it again- I've read really positive things about it. maybe it would help you.

as regards your other hrt- it's so hard to know, isn't it? for some women an increase in oestrogen hrt is the ticket and for others, like me, I feel that it becomes less and less something I can take- i feel i've run my course with oestrogen

best of luck and keep posting. women do get past this. have you had your levels checked? x

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Fizwhizz

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Re: Can’t be bothered/loss of motivation
« Reply #9 on: May 09, 2023, 05:24:16 PM »

It can be so difficult to unpick and understand what’s going on. I went to the GP and she was sympathetic. I’m going to have some general blood work as a start. Then I have an appointment with the private meno GP to see what she says about hormone levels etc. She’s always been keen to optimise my hormone levels before adding in testosterone but I think my own natural hormones are gone now. I’ve had some hormone tests with her so hopefully that will give me some clue on the hormone front. I could need AD’s too. I really don’t know. I feel a bit better just for being honest with the regular GP and opening up about how bad I was feeling. I’d be up for trying testosterone and/or AD’s in the future.
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Flossieteacake

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Re: Can’t be bothered/loss of motivation
« Reply #10 on: May 09, 2023, 05:52:13 PM »

It can be so difficult to unpick and understand what’s going on. I went to the GP and she was sympathetic. I’m going to have some general blood work as a start. Then I have an appointment with the private meno GP to see what she says about hormone levels etc. She’s always been keen to optimise my hormone levels before adding in testosterone but I think my own natural hormones are gone now. I’ve had some hormone tests with her so hopefully that will give me some clue on the hormone front. I could need AD’s too. I really don’t know. I feel a bit better just for being honest with the regular GP and opening up about how bad I was feeling. I’d be up for trying testosterone and/or AD’s in the future.

Well done for opening up. I know how hard that can be. I think you are brave and it sounds like it went well.
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Fizwhizz

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Re: Can’t be bothered/loss of motivation
« Reply #11 on: May 11, 2023, 08:40:06 AM »

Thanks. I felt a bit like ‘crazy lady’ as there’s so much that could be hormonal or other things or a combination of both. The GP was sympathetic though and even if it’s other stuff add hormonal difficulties into the mix and it can cause upset. I’m still feeling detached and strange and struggling with the caring routine when inside I really feel I don’t care much at all about anything really 😬 This is a great space to vent in though. Thanks everyone.
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Inky

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Re: Can’t be bothered/loss of motivation
« Reply #12 on: May 16, 2023, 03:24:11 PM »

Is the amount of eostrogen you are taking enough? I thought most peeps were on patches or tablets for that hormone - the cream is usually an addition. For example, I take patches twice a week and utrogestan and also was prescribed the cream as extra local oestrogen to keep VA at bay. I have now stopped using the cream cos I find it less effective that Vagifem local tablet - so, as far as I am aware - your eostrogen level might be too low.
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Inky

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Re: Can’t be bothered/loss of motivation
« Reply #13 on: May 16, 2023, 03:25:44 PM »

PS totally identify with the loss of motivation/detachment/ flat/withdrawn feeling - I used to be very physically active and now I do nothing and even that exhausts me!
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