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[SarahT]

Group hug gratefully accepted and very much returned as well. 😍

[Penguin]

Gratefully received CLKD!

That's my hope too Sarah, that actually menopause is easier for when I don't have the ups and downs to contend with. Although from seeing posts on here, it does seem that symptoms can still ebb and flow for years.

[CLKD]

I remember how anxiety has ruled me from age 3, sometimes it's almost ruined my Life.  With appropriate medication, a loving husband and good GP, I've survived.  Sometimes I wonder how  .  Cutting back on commitments has helped.  As did talking therapy, to vent with some1 who couldn't say "that couldn't have possibly happened to you" .....

[Penguin]

I feel the same CLKD and very grateful I have a supportive GP, counsellor and lovely husband, who is so incredibly patient with how much I have changed over the past couple of years.  I would love to be how I was a few years ago, I still had minor anxiety (kids, work etc) but nothing on this scale. Still, I do get good times, sometimes lasting a fee weeks at a time and I am SO grateful for them that I enjoy every minute x

[CLKD]

Take time to sniff the roses - 🌹 🌺

I think anxiety when raising children is more adrenaline fuelled so less likely to take over: then hormones kick in : the change : with less of a break and the catasophtirving [??] takes over.  Add to that Cortisol which woke me in the early hours 

[SarahT]

Ladies seems like we all share similarities.

I am under no illusions that meno will be my happy ever after, just hope it stops the severe cyclical mood swings.

I have accepted I will never be the old me, life continues and we alter with it through good and bad experiences. Am just working towards a better me than I am now.🙄 and I have things in place, my current hrt which I can tweak, anti anxiety meds, if I need, and counselling to be set up. Luckily like yourselves I have a loving supportive husband by my side.

Like you CKLD I have cut back on non essential commitments, am a bit needy in that I have to plan  my day as much as I can, only do one thing at a time. Anything that comes up unexpectedly can freak me out. So work to be done.

Mostly I am realistic, but it can feel overwhelmng. So Penguin, I too am work in progress. We'll get there honey. And all the advice and support, and group hugs help us get there too.
Women are bloody amazing.

Xx

[CLKD]

Spontaneous I'm fine - planning freaks me HUGELY !  so I need options.    and if others don't like my options, TUFF 

[SarahT]

Ha! We certainly differ in that way...

It's all about learning what we need at given times of our lives, and hope the situations can be adapted to for what we need at that time.

Lucky those closest to me know how I am and how I need to cope, (right now anyway, as I hope to slowly improve on this)  and try to understand. But, like you....I they don't like it TUFF.

We should have  T-shirts printed as a hormonal motto.😂😂😂

[CLKD]

I think that we had a similar thread years ago 

I'm hormonal and I know how to use it

[Penguin]

I sort of fall in the middle in terms of planning. I do plan things as it makes me feel safer, but I know now to never plan things I can't get out of if I can't face them when the time comes. I know now that I can't predict how I'm going to feel so I don't even try lol. Have wasted too many trips when I've been so anxious I didn't enjoy them that I'd rather cancel than waste the money. Means I really do appreciate things when I feel well enough to go. Saying that though, I've had some good trips recently and when I'm present  I'm really present, and have really enjoyed the kids too. Grateful when it's like that.

Atm I'm trying to get guts up to book my summer hol but I have my follow up colonoscopy in early June (nobody is worried about it but me, as its only 11 months since last one and they only found polyp then) and can't seem to plan further than that 'just in case' you know!!!

[Penguin]

So far I've found thar nobody 'gets it' apart from people in this group!

[CLKD]

It's about empathy.  People may sympathise but it ain't the same! 

A bit like when someone has a head cold, I know what it feels like but I don't actually feel the symptoms: if that makes sense 

[SarahT]

Penguin, I assure you there will always, always be someone on here who gets it.

Like you, I have missed a few trips because on the day it  felt too much. So, again, I take the good days for what they are, and enjoy them,  as the dips can be so random, you may wake up okay and then... Oh, here it comes again.  But I have had some good days lately too. 😁
I look back to how I was say a year ago, and I do think I am improving mostly. But the bad dips are worse, but not as frequent. So that's a plus really.
And I know so much more, especially or actually nearly everything from this forum so I do have a better understanding of what is going on.... Even if I don't like it!😶

[CLKD]

I'm OK if I can get out and not have to justify myself ;-).

[SarahT]

Oh yes. That's a big one.

I have finally learnt its ok to put myself first.  That wasn't easy to 'allow ' myself to so.  I mean, if I break down in pieces, I'm no good to anyone, my self or anyone around me. It's not about being selfish or self indulgent.


It's essential I get outside each day. Walks are best but if work\commitments don't allow this then at least a walk or potter in the garden.
I've had let go of some of the household stuff, it does get done. Mostly. But I simply cannot manage  everything physically, or with the anxiety like I used  to.
It may get better, It may not. But being more accepting makes me less anxious, which helps me and also my husband who has watched me tie myself up in knots trying to be the Wonder Woman I was.   But there's still a version of me here, very different and seems to change every day,  depending on how my hormones decide to treat me. Getting there. Sort of! 😳