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[Toomuchstress]

I was 44 when I heard of perimenopause and its symptoms,  id been experiencing awful anxiety (health) and horrific panic attacks , my face every day at around 5pm to 6pm would go bright red hot and it would last 2 or so hours, etc etc,

My doctor wasn't having any of it , I kept getting told "your too young to start HRT etc etc"
I managed last year to convince them to let me try it , I was prescribed "utrogestan 100mg 2 tablets each night for 12 days a month" and "one spray of lenzetto"
I found that within 3 days of stopping them I would get my period , and also I was even worse on it !! ,
My temper would go from 0 to 100 in seconds and my anxiety was worse than ever ,
So I heard a few people say to me that they used evorel sequi patch and they felt great some after a few hours of using a patch ,

For me nothing changed , in fact I had an extra added symptom (i felt nervous on edge like something terrible was going to happen) ,

So after being on it for a month had my period on the 16th for a week (usually only have it for 4 days)
 had hormones checked (blood test) everything normal , testosterone was slightly low and my prolactin was raised (has been raised since 2016 I found out recently) ,
But I couldn't cope one night I was at my Wits end , i was ill with a lung infection and after having a bad panic attack I ripped the patch off on the 23rd ,
The nervous on edge feeling has gone and I feel less anxious , but I'm worried as the the last 5 or maybe 6 days I've been bleeding , with slight stomach period pain cramps , I was fine for 5 days after taking the patch off ,

I've still lost my libido totally gone , husband isn't happy , and my body is like im run down , cold sores on my lips ,
And I'm worried now that what if my body needs those hormones and I'm not taking anything , I really don't want to go back on them ,
I'm 45 , I'll be 46 in July and worst part of all is I've never been able to conceive and doctors have never given me any reason how i haven't been able to , I REALLY want a child and I'm mostly convinced it won't happen , but then I read somewhere that someone aged 48 gets pregnant and I get hopeful,

I'm in the UK and I cannot afford to pay privately for fertility treatment ,
I'm so depressed as I know I'd make a great mother , but with my body been messed up cos of the "taking HRT and then stopping a few times" ,
I'm never going to find out if I'm ovulating or even try for a baby because I've been bleeding for nearly a week ,

Is it normal to bleed this long ?
When I haven't been on HRT patch long (just a month) ?
Any advice I'd greatly appreciate as I suffer health anxiety this is making me think I got something bad wrong with me

[CLKD]

Morning.  don't worry about the multiple posts, it's the server.  Apparently 

  

[CLKD]

WHOOOA!  U have a lot going on in your mind and body.

Firstly: print out advice for husbands from the Forum and hand to your husband.

Who is over-seeing your infertility?  The body isn't designed to have children into our 40s, everything slows down naturally  .  This won't be due to you intermittently using any form of HRT.  Some feel that as the periods wax and wane, that they need to have a 'last go' at becoming pregnant.  Stress can cause lack of success in that the whole focus is on becoming pregnant.

Occasionally acceptance: which is difficult: allows the body to relax enough to do 'normal' things = a baby.  The 'trying' especially when using a thermometer to check ovulation, puts a huge strain on a couple. 

GPs need a kick.  No woman is 'too young'!  Pity that they don't listen to symptoms rather than telling women that we don't know our bodies  .  How have your periods been since puberty?  The bleeding is probably a mix of the replacement and your own hormones.

Your body is behaving differently which causes you to think that something might be 'wrong'.  I suggest that you contact your nurse practitioner for a chat and health check, i.e. blood tests for thyroid function, VitD levels - unless you are being screened by a fertility consultant?

[CLKD]

The daisy web-site is for ladies with 'premature' menopause.  Let us know how you get on.

[VanillaLover]

Oh dear you poor thing. I’m so sorry about your struggles with fertility.

I started struggling with perimenopause at around the age you did. I think what you have to remember is that during peri the hormone fluctuations are huge, sometimes extra oestrogen may actually make it worse as your body is having a spike anyway.

I’ve found that a couple of years later (nearly 47) I am a little further down the line, lighter periods, everything drier BUT symptoms generally more stable and manageable.

I appreciate that this doesn’t help you much now!

It’s fine to remove the patch if you find it’s not helping. It won’t have messed your body up. Women do get pregnant at 45, was it Cherie Blair had an “accident” at that age ?

It might get harder to tell if you are ovulating anyway as things are in flux.

Are you normally able to tell when? Are your periods normally regular?

Sorry if this hasn’t been much help to you!

[CLKD]

I did reply - here it is!

[CLKD]

How R U having read the responses ......... the server keeps repeating some initial threads  which makes it hard to keep up!

[Toomuchstress]

I'm still bleeding bright red and sometimes period type cramps ,
It's been 4-6 days and I only had a period 2 weeks ago,

Normally since 13 years old I'd get my period every 28 -30 days ,

Going on utrogestan then coming off it and then the patches my periods have normalised ,
But I wasn't on them.for long for them to still make me bleed ,

I've had a good couple of days until tonight (which I put on "sprinkes" post ,

Having a low libido doesn't help me with a baby ,
But having tried all my life , and after having a laproscopy at age 20 said nothing was wrong

Had a ultrasound done 2 years ago to check my stomach and after I told the lady I wanted children she did tell me "I did see a follicle in your left ovary so that's good.she told me"

When i seen doctors about fertility they never took it further until 2 years ago where the gynaecologist told me your 43 and you will have to pay privately (cannot afford it)

Last year my smear said abnormal cells so had to have biopsy done twice and they said medium level to high level ,
On the 2nd one they said it wasn't high level enough to worry about and they would access me in a year with a smear which that is due coming up in 4 weeks

Think that's why I'm worrying about the bleeding

I HATE health anxiety it takes over your life

Thanks everyone for your replies I didn't know anyone had  ❤️

[MrsMitch]

Hello TMS, I'm a bit late to the thread but just wanted to add a couple of things. Firstly as CLKD said,  get your husband to read here. As much as you say he's not happy, perhaps gently ask him if he would be feeling the same emotion if you had been diagnosed with a serious illness? Would he not be happy then or would he want to do everything he could to support you through the illness no matter what? Because that's what he needs to do with menopause.  If he takes a look at the threads on here from countless women and takes a look at the myriad of symptoms that take over their life, he may start to realise what you're up against. We cannot pick and chose what we will support our spouse through and from ladies I've known personally,  in the vast majority of cases where the husband has issues with their wife's struggles, often it's their lack of libido that is the number one problem for them. You need love and support  after all, he may have health problems one day and I'll bet you'll give 100% support. But the more info he has, the more he can understand and empathise.
Secondly with regard to children, I've never had any. My issue was endometriosis but no one addressed my symptoms or told me that I would need fertility treatment should I desire children. I was just kind of left to it.  It is possible to get through not having children but it may be you need to concentrate on your menopausal problems as a priority, perhaps. After all, if you did conceive and the symptoms weren't under control ir getting worse, a baby could make things unbearable for you, with all the pressures they bring.
So perhaps at some stage it may be more helpful for you to try to get help coming to terms with not having children because you've got so much going on, haven't you?
I hope I don't sound like I'm lecturing, just hoping to help