![Undecided :-\](https://www.menopausematters.co.uk/forum/Smileys/extended/undecided.gif)
Oh dear, feeling a bit down today so hope you ladies don’t mind me putting my thoughts down here..Maybe one or two of you lovely ladies can relate..
Trying my best to cope with mum’s obvious cognitive decline but sometimes feel I’m coming up short and today’s one of those days ![Undecided :-\](https://www.menopausematters.co.uk/forum/Smileys/extended/undecided.gif)
I’m always saying that, as long as she’s safe and reasonably happy, then there’s no reason for her to move (she’s desperate to be “carried out feet first”) but I’m seeing real decline - forgetting to take her tablets, a bit of decline in personal care (not convinced she’s in a shower every day - she was OCD about this at one time but she will not entertain carers). She’s sometimes unaware re safety when walking about outside (crossing roads and looking after her purse etc
) Thank goodness I’m retired because I couldn’t cope with the level of support I’m giving if I had to work!
Don’t mean to be needy but I feel a bit depressed about it all today for some reason (and it’s only going to get worse isn’t it?) How will I know when to get more help? It’s left to me as my brother is clueless!
Thanks for listening ladies - all comments welcome 🙏 xx
Hi Songbird.
It's so difficult with loved ones when they cognitively start to decline.
Sometimes age concern can be quite good, even if it's just you contacting them for a listening ear as I know it can be very very difficult.
I believe it's called Age UK now and they can arrange things like social care. Even if you're mum won't entertain carers, Age UK may be able to give you some help and advice.
Sometimes with loved ones if the carer was introduced by you, say if the carer went to visit your mum and you were there the first few times.
I think though if your mum starts to wander, late at night say that's when things could get difficult.
Sometimes elderly parents, deep down know when they need extra care (even if they don't vocalise it) and sometimes when the extra care, even a care home when the time is right, is arranged carefully and sensitively, once they are settled I think they feel much better in themselves as well.
Sending you a hug and lots of love xxxx