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[CLKD]

You moan away!  It sounds as though your Gynae might be OK - mayB discuss who she is in contact with to keep update with guidelines, mention MM too ;-)

Care in the community - those of us at the time it was muted knew that it was unlikely to work.  The government of the day had no idea what it takes to lift, keep someone clean, deal with bedding, bathing etc.  .  The carers sent to my Dad in the early 2002 were being contacted continually by the company who used them, never giving the girls time to get between clients; not taking into account road and weather conditions.  I would have taken the mobiles off them as they walked through the door as dad never got the full hour that he was paying for!

Do you have hoists etc. to help movement?  Did U watch the programme last night where the builders redesigned a property for 3 children with disabilities?  I criticised one area of planning  .  What about TV in your room?  I wanted one in the bathroom but DH said 'no' 

If you are having phone consults mayB make a list of your worries?  So that you don't forget anything?  I would say to my GP "I wonder if we can put these concerns into a priority".  He was worried if I went to a consult without my list 

The body doesn't take up added hormones suddenly so make take a. while for the system to settle.  Keep posting!

[Armadillo]

I am really concerned about low mood.. as a long term chronic illness person.. life is tricky enough and that affects mood.. ut throw on progesterone and i end up very bad.. we reach the point thatI am always supervised .. no choice today my husband really needed to go to GP in person.

I want to stop progesterone.. last time got to 5 days rather than 10 and stopped.. but theyve told me i have to keep going if i want to stay on oestrogen.  Without oestrogen quality of life was non existent.. so its a trade 16 less awful weeks and 10 days trying to keep me safe and managing whilst i progesterone or nothing and the awful way that put me before i started hrt.

I so wonder if i stopped everything wether it would be as bad as it was before.. but when i forget my estrogel in the morning we can tell by lunchtime something is missing.

as I said.. i cant keep this up.. but not sure there is an option.. i dont want to be this person.. my other health stuff is quite enough to manage

I feel confident in my Gynae.. he's a good chap, works well with my GP and has gone and researched a bit as my other health 'adds interest'... if honest i am nervous about starting with a new consultant as have a few others on the go at the minute.

My PA/ Carers are employed by me.. i am given funding to do so.. thatw ay i can choose the right people.. i am lucky my three have been with me between 2-8 years but my 'hours' have doubled and cant get anyone new.. thankfully not hoists.. i am ambulatory in house.. but fall risk, wheelchair user.. various stuff going on (M.E = extras and ptsd from being this ill and life it forces).. i had some great agency carers but oh the whole not an experience i wish to undergo again.

I can email my GP before a phone call and he rings and goes through, or i take lists.. i need help with cognition as despite having a brain pre-illness it doesnt always step up to the job nowadays.. then add menopause brain.

i think i proably need to reach out to my GP.. but thats so much harder to get an appointment now

[Flossieteacake]

I think it is really concerning you have to take progesterone when it makes your MH so much worse. That is were a menopause clinic may be more helpful. I am not on any progesterone and take oestrogen, although they are unhappy with this I cannot be without it. They are looking into alternatives for me but I know for certain, taking progesterone when it causes low mood can be dangerous.

I also think it is about quality of life. Having a chronic illness or disability is hard enough without extra things to make us feel low.

So if you always need supervision due to low mood surely that is a reason for them to give you oestrogen without progesterone, at least until an alternative can be found?

I can understand you feeling nervous about having to speak to another medical professional. It is exhausting having to go through everything again.

I hope my post is not upsetting to read. I am just worried about you.

[CLKD]

I would suggest then that you ditch the progesterone .......... ask your Gynae how much of a risk is there of a build up in the womb, lots of ladies go for regular scanning if they opt for less progesterone.  MayB ring his Secretary, pose the query and ask for a call back, push how ill you feel at the moment.  Quality of Life is the most important issue.

Glad that in the main your care rota is sorted. 

[Armadillo]

Flossie..

I am sorry you suffer this way too but it's reassuring to know it's real and not just me faking it .yep my mental health doubts me.

Clkd.
I asked about ditching progesterone over and over. Even said to my GP I felt I'd rather take the risk .. but I know uterine cancer is horrific  and it feels awful to suggest it.

Quality of life only seems to count if palliative or still able to work in the big scheme of things.. wrong I know.

I am not robust enough now to talk to Gynae secretary.. mental health is bad.. and as I have PTSD with medical triggers I think it could rock me over.

Will think again in morning.. sobbing at thought of next progesterone.. due at 8.. will get there..

Reaching the stage my husband stops sleeping now.. if I am awake he's awake.. I have a good man but it's not fair on him.

[CLKD]

What support are you both getting for your mental health?

[Flossieteacake]

I am so sorry you are going through this. I know there are risks not taking progesterone but this can be monitored. There are also risks to want to end your life.

I know MH care is pretty poor and it is so hard to get support.

I totally understand feeling overwhelmed at the thought of having to talk to the gyno now. You need to take things at your own pace and not feel rushed.

[CLKD]

...... and breath.  What does DH suggest?

[Armadillo]

Mental health support.. oh that would be lovely. Written off as we can't fix you and until you ' try to end life' no help, even then it's time limited.
The intensive team referred me for more care hours in November as with better quality of life from more support my mental health is better. Just can't recruit for the almost minimum wage funding..

The saving thing is I am too poorly to take action.

...

My husband is really supportive. He has been to every appointment, read up as best he can.. talks to my GP etc and even Gynae for me.

He knows the progesterone problem and supports me not doing the ten days but also trying too.. it's my decision but he's backing me.

..

Going to see if I can speak to nurse at GP today.. or leave message for my GP.  They pretty much all say they will refer to my GP anyway as so much going on but the system says start with nurse and they pass on to duty Dr who passes on to my GP.

[CLKD]

Sadly that's the way it is since Covid  .  Plus over 500 medics leaving the NHS weekly.  Plus lack of those wanting to go into the care system, many are leaving to work in supermarkets: regular hours and more pay.   

[Armadillo]

Hello

Firstly huge massive thanks to all who held my hand through this. 

I spoke to reception and a GP phoned me about 20 minutes later.  Not my GP but one of the 'good guys' he was rooting through my files and could see my GP is talking with my gynae

As he isnt familiar with the whole 'train wreck' he offered various other progesterone options.. sadly tried them before getting to this point.  We discussed options.. that progesterone is so needed for uterus health and so on.. but equally to protect it i first need to be alive.

The non ideal conclusion.. i am not going to take any more progesterone just yet i managed 4 days.  He is going to chat with my GP when he is back on shift and leave a message for him.  The plan is my GP gets back in touch and we work out a plan.   But for now I am stopping progesterone.

-------

I am starting to think about not using HRT.. but the oestrogen helps me so very much ..
i am wondering if the peri symptoms will still be as dominant as they were at the start of this if i stopped HRT.

Lots of research needed

I wish i could just ride the 10 days out every 16 weeks.. but its is just so distressing.. i could probably cope with pain, and anxiety, panic and tears, itching, being even weaker in stamina if i ddnt have the extra mental health symptoms on top. 

Too many what ifs.

but for now i am looking forwards to progesterone wearing off so i can just get some proper sleep.. then i can work on flu jab, covid booster etc..

the title stands.. i cant keep this up.  taking progesterone just feels like i am poisoning myself, self harming and we all hunker down.. even my PA/Carers dread when the word progesterone appears on the calender .

thank you .. i am wishing you all an easy journey through this menopause thing

[Flossieteacake]

I am relieved you have decided to stop the progesterone. I really hope the suicidal feeling lessens for you now. It is lovely the GP was supportive and understanding.

I think you may feel worse if you stop the oestrogen. Also, are you taking anything for vaginal atrophy? I know that causes me major pain and low mood.

You cannot help not being able to tolerate progesterone. I cannot either so I sympathise.

[Armadillo]

Good morning Flossie

huge relief here too.. thank you so much for being here with me.

The suicide mental health stuff should clear up over today and tmrw if previous patterns hold.. i am just not being alone today for safety.

----
Stopping estrgel is not something i want to do but if i have to have progesterone i am not sure there is an option. 

Vaginal atrophy... i havent even started to look at that.  A lot er, drier than before but nothing thats triggered me to actually look into anything..its sort of at the bottom of the 'health stuff' to-do list as very low prioriy

I have such a long list of medicines my body does weird things with... and list of diagnosis that i start to feel 'guilty' for anything extra.. i definetely have more than my fair share of the NHS but I dont waste them i am always careful.

I am sorry you have the same problem with progesterone.. now i am not spiralling can i ask what solution you have? please

[Flossieteacake]

I am glad you are not alone today. It is so important not to be alone when feeling so low.

I understand everything is overwhelming so thinking of vaginal atrophy may be too much. Just in case you want to know, it just requires a cream or pessary to be inserted. It is very mild and does not need any progesterone if you were to use it.

It is sad you feel guilty if you have anything else going on. You cannot help what you are going through and actually, all women will have menopause at some stage.

With me I am a complicated case. I have tried every type of progesterone only to be left feeling suicidal and in such deep depression. I have continued to take oestrogen throughout though. I have been on oestrogen alone for 2 years now with short periods of trying progesterone. They do not know what to do with me. At the last menopause appointment they wanted me to reduce my patch from 100 to 75 but as soon as I did my vaginal atrophy symptoms were unbearable so I have had to go back to 100. They mentioned a plant based type of progesterone but said it is unavailable right now. I am not sure what will happen but whatever they say, I refuse to reduce or stop oestrogen. I have severe mental illness and cannot cope with feeling any worse then I already do. I am sorry. I know this is of no help to you.

[Armadillo]

Oh Flossie

What a struggle you have. I do hope they find the right think for you.

I feel very strongly I'd like to keep esteogel as it's made a huge difference.
My mental health wobbles quite a bit.. to me that seems normal reaction to my wonky health and some if the things that have happened. But it is never the way the progesterone makes me .. just not that intense.

It's a shame there isn't an answer for us both. My head is settling a bit now so will be able to email and articulate things better to my GP tmrw.

I will in a few days read the threads about menopause without hrt looking for ideas.

Thank you.. you and ckld..talked me off the cliff these last few days.. such a comfort..