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[Skylark]

Hi ladies,

I'm not a new member but for some reason I haven't been able to access my account.

Long story short,  I'm 56 and still peri. Had extensive bleeding after coming off HRT (my choice) last August.  I eventually had a polyp removed via hysteroscopy in April which came back benign.  I was offered the mirena but at that point had finally gone 9 weeks without a period so opted to wait it out. Then my biopsy came back as disordered proliferative endometrium. The GP freaked me out (didn't really understand the pathology report) but the nurse hysteroscopist said it was a common finding in peri and they only wanted to biopsy again in 5 months due to my age.  My periods in between have been much lighter (apart from one horrendous one) although every 20-24 days on average. Lots of anxiety,  low mood, considerable work stress. Anyway the 5 months became 7 for various reasons (appointment falling during a bleed, being ill) and I had my biopsy last week and the mirena put in. I only bled lightly for a day and the hysteroscopist was reassuring saying if the results were similar the mirena will do its work. But then she mentioned "oh you had morules too." I latched onto this and asked her what it meant, but she said it wasn't even hyperplasia and it was just something that can occasionally lead to something more sinister. Of course, she doesn't know me and wouldn't have realised I would then Google this extensively and overthink. I have been obsessing about it and now fear the worst. Some sources say morules are often found alongside pre cancer, or worse; others state the relationship is unknown and it's more the features of the morules than the presence of them. I have worked myself into such a state. I was already struggling with burnout at work due to a stressful job and more demands being placed on me. Add to that other stresses and sad news in other areas of my life and I feel like I can't cope. I have brief spells of mindfulness,  do yoga, think more rationally,  then I become overwhelmed again. I'm frightened,  don't know what to do and feel like I can't face anything right now, least of all work. Can anyone help? I feel so alone. Hubby is so supportive but feels like he is failing because I feel so bad. I've reassured him he really is doing only right by me and this is not his fault.

Thanks ladies. x

[Sarokel]

So sorry you've got all this going on, no wonder you feel overwhelmed! I hope you get to the bottom of it ASAP! Much love xxx

[Skylark]

Thank you for your kind reply, Sarokel. It makes me feel less alone.

💗

[CLKD]

Stop looking at GOOGLE?   He don't know owt!

GPs have the tendency to throw words around without following up!  If it were serious you would have been sent for a consult with a specialist. 

MayB ring and ask for a call back from the GP?  Explain that you are worried and ask whether you need to be.  Sitting, mulling, worrying won't help.  I always start by "I wasn't really listening last time and you used a long word :XXX: - R U able to explain more about the risks?"

Let us know how you Teton.

[Sarokel]

Anytime you need to reach out please do, health scares terrify me so I totally get where you are coming from!

Thank you for your kind reply, Sarokel. It makes me feel less alone.

💗

[CLKD]

We get more focusses on health issues as we age.  Especially if we have children/elderly parents etc. taking up brain space. 

[Skylark]

Thank you, CLKD and Sarokel. I've considered phoning the GP but overall have found them very unsupportive. I also thought about ringing the department but feel my results should be back any day now so I may as well just embrace this anxiety. It's been a constant for months, early waking with a surge of fear and my life these days seems to be filled with dread. It's got to the point I'm struggling with work mainly because I'm working way above my pay grade. I've made my manager aware this isn't acceptable but had no real response. I took a couple of days sick before a week's leave just to buy myself some healing time.  But that has been overshadowed by the biopsy and the fear about that. Every day feels a battle.

X

[Skylark]

So my anxiety is through the roof. A letter arrived from the hospital but it was just a copy of the report sent to the GP about what happened at my appointment.  It mentioned "multiple morules" in the previous biopsy which is what I've already googled. These seem often associated with sinister outcomes. Would they have left me 5 months to have a second biopsy (in reality 7 as I had to cancel) if it was a serious risk? I'm beside myself already.

X