Hello, it took me a while to get courage to post here. I just wanted to share my story with those who can relate and understand as I feel I'm going through it all alone and no one understands what it feels like... I'm only 40, my symptoms started when I was 38 suddenly - went to sleep ?normal?, woke up as ?new normal? I suppose. Life changed overnight. It took my GP over 18 months to diagnose me with 'sudden ovarian failure?. After numerous invasive tests, after recommending to admit myself to psych hospital, after tens of different antidepressants and calmatives none of which worked. I was completely floored with so many symptoms at once that I honestly thought I was dying, from mental issues such as sudden suicidal depression, severe anxiety/constant panic attacks and a sense of de-realization to numerous physical symptoms: severe fatigue but complete inability to sleep, migraines, hot flushes, nought ulcers, a gunslinger atrophy, severe aches and pains in joints and back, dizziness, loss of memory, vertigo, loss of hearing, bad vision, complete inability to focus/rationalize/organize, loss of proper coordination, tinnitus and many more. Those months I was pretty much ridden unable to take care of family, work and live my life. When my periods from erratic suddenly stopped for 3 months, I went back to GP begging for help; finally she did a simple blood test that showed I was very deep into menopausal journey. Gave me Femoston 2/10 and sent me off. And that's that. I've been on it for 4 months, and even though it helped (severe symptoms were just improving on their own but very very slowly prior to medication) it did not help as much as I'd like it to. I'm back at work now and I can finally cook and go out, but I still feel different, not myself, I still have mild hot flushes, still have aches and pains and insomnia that comes and goes, I still suffer from anxiety or as I now feel total lack of stress resilience, heart palpitation and dizziness, strange muscle spasms, and so on. Prior to this I had not had a history of anxiety or depression. Now I don't know what is worse: my mental health or my physical health as both seem to not be what they should be. I've contacted a new practitioner to try BHRT course in the form of troches. I fully realize the pros and cons, read everything I possibly could before deciding to switch. But I really want to restore my normality, want yo be a good mum and wife, a good friend, a good worker, daughter, sister. And I feel that I can't. I can't lift whatever is pushing me into ground and become me again. It is by far the hardest journey I've yet had to make in my life. I did not realize before until things changed overnight for me. It is a complete and utter drain of all will power and both physical and mental strength.