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[sheila99]

For anyone with caring responsibilities for elderly or sick relatives I thought we might use this thread to swap ideas, I don't know what to do for the best.
  MIL in her 80s, heart bypass, celiac, gets confused, only able to live alone because of OH. He takes her shopping, to appointments, dispenses her pills (after she took a double dose), peels the spuds, opens difficult packaging etc etc. How do we keep her safe? The virus is probably guaranteed to kill her but having no help in the house might do too. DD is the most likely source of infection, she takes the train to a large school, A levels next year. Do I take her out?

[CLKD]

There is a certain age group that so far seems immune.  What does the Head of Year suggest?  If pupils work from home the whole internet might crash.  Have a look Public Health England and keep an eye on the daily bulletins from Boris.

As for your elderly MiL - could you send an e-mail to their Surgery to ask?  Have a plan in case either you or OH falls ill with anything, not necessary this particular Bug.  Are there District Nurses for example that could assist if necessary?  AgeUK? 

We have been told that ours will deliver medication to those housebound as well as suggesting that we ring to check if anyone is worried for a chat with a Nurse or GP.  Is your MiL generally well for her age and health conditions?  What appts might be necessary in the next 2-3 months, could they be postponed?   Toothache of course would need to be an emergency.

Would food deliveries help - is there a local shop that would take an order round?  That's what our village is trying to sort, like a food bank but for those here.  Letting those living alone know that they are not alone.  How far does OH need to travel each time?

[Dorothy]

Current advice is that it is ok to visit the vulnerable as long as you do not have any symptoms yourself and maintain a 2 metre distance between you.  So as long as you observe scrupulous hygiene when visiting, your MIL should be ok.  Also, if you have a cuppa at her house, I would take your own mug with you - it's important not to share mugs etc as infection can be spread that way.

I will continue to visit my mother, following these rules, for as long as I am allowed to.  Being cut off from family & friends is likely to cause depression, anxiety or stress, which in themselves are known to weaken the immune system, making someone more susceptible to disease. 

[CLKD]

Apparently the Bug lives on surfaces for 5-8 days so it's important to wash down with boiled water and detergent.  I don't know if it's necessary to wipe down or air dry?

[Katejo]

Current advice is that it is ok to visit the vulnerable as long as you do not have any symptoms yourself and maintain a 2 metre distance between you.  So as long as you observe scrupulous hygiene when visiting, your MIL should be ok.  Also, if you have a cuppa at her house, I would take your own mug with you - it's important not to share mugs etc as infection can be spread that way.

I will continue to visit my mother, following these rules, for as long as I am allowed to.  Being cut off from family & friends is likely to cause depression, anxiety or stress, which in themselves are known to weaken the immune system, making someone more susceptible to disease.

  I went to see my Dad and cook him lunch yesterday. Will continue unless we are in lockdown so I can't get there. Kept my distance as a precaution

[CLKD]

R U able to batch cook for him?

Have a look-see at your village facebook to see what's being arranged locally?

[sheila99]

I distrust government advice, they've changed their minds too many times to be believable. We don't know when a person becomes infectious, is it really only when they develop symptoms or could it be before? The outbreak in Italy started from someone who didn't know he had it. And surfaces - he is handling her pills. If there are bugs in his breath they have to land somewhere, and I don't think we really know how long they live for. A health worker is (rightly) protected with full ppi and face mask, yet on old person won't catch it with an infected person in their home as long as they're 6 feet away? It  doesn't add up. Agree about the loneliness though.

[Dorothy]

I think the problem is that they have to keep giving 'advice' to the public even if they don't know what they're doing!

[CLKD]

The situation is escalating hourly.  Hence the afternoon updates with advice.  They won't get it right every time but if it helps stablise what we ought to do now ..........

Mum's care home has closed it's doors to anyone sniffling  should I be upset, am I   

[Dorothy]

Just wondering what 'unnecessary social contact' is - I'm going to do some shopping for my mum tomorrow.  She was really upset at the thought that I won't go in.  If I don't go in, she's likely to insist on going out to shop for herself, so that she can at least say hello to the checkout person. 

So - is it better for me to pop in for a cuppa and try to keep the 2 metre distance, or not pop in at all and she ends up wandering round town because she's lonely...

[pants46]

Do her shopping for her.
Then go in for a cuppa. But wash your hands like your life depends on it, as soon as you go into her house.
Don't hug her or kiss her.
Make sure you wash up your tea cup before leaving. And dont touch any surfaces you dont need to.
xx

[sheila99]

Go for the cuppa first, take your own cup. Do the shopping after and just drop it off. Oh, and don't breathe while you're there!
Seeing just one person gives her a lower chance of being exposed to the virus. Can she work a computer? Facetime or Skype is she can, sim with unlimited minutes if she can't.

[pants46]

Good advice Sheila, re cuppa first, then shopping.

[Dorothy]

Go for the cuppa first, take your own cup. Do the shopping after and just drop it off. Oh, and don't breathe while you're there!
Seeing just one person gives her a lower chance of being exposed to the virus. Can she work a computer? Facetime or Skype is she can, sim with unlimited minutes if she can't.

Yes, I thought shopping after would be least risky - and I'm wearing clean clothes so hopefully won't be carrying anything in on them when I go in.  She's already so distressed at being stuck indoors, so on balance, I think a brief visit, paying scrupulous attention to hygiene, is going to be less risky than her keeling over from a heart attack through stress or rushing out to a cafe because she's so desperate for company.

She doesn't hear well over the phone and can't use the internet - it scares her - so it's going to be a tough few weeks or months.

[sheila99]

Does she have a phone designed for the hard of hearing? My aunt had one, it was actually easier to speak to her on the phone than shout at her in the flesh (refused to wear hearing aids).