Hi Andi70.
Glad you've found us.....sorry to hear your struggles, we've all had them, and still having them.
Sounds like your peri menopause to me. You have to go a full 12 months without a period to be Post meno...so you've got to start counting again...
Do some research on here, and you can decide if you want to go down the hrt route. Sorry for your loss I'm sure that doesn't help, and I'm sure your family doesn't hate you, it's the dreaded hormones telling you that, it's not easy, but someone's always on here to offer help and support...ask anything you want.
A lot of ladies on here are on hrt and antidepressants, I've been on hrt for nearly two years now, and without it, I don't know how I would've coped...I declined antidepressants, because I knew it was my hormones doing the damage and that I wasn't depressed in the true sense of the word...( plus, I'd had horrible experiences with antidepressants years ago) so I opted for hrt, and although it's been a hard slog, I'm now better than I have been for years...so, have a read, and I'm sure someone will post with more experience than me, hang on in there, book an appointment at the docs, and discuss hrt options.
Wishing you well, and keep posting to let us know how your doing...your not alone....
Jd xx