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[AngsanaBlossom]

I am on my 3rd pump/ cycle of Estradiol and Utrogeston pills. Just last Friday I was at my doctors telling her how great I was feeling and how it had taken the edge off my symptoms. The last few days though I have felt back to square one. I am feeling anxious and depressed, feeling like I am going mad and just wishing this would pass and I could get on with my life. It is about day 6 of my cycle, the end of my period.

I was upset this morning and was in tears over feeling this way again. I had a list in my hand of all the Christmas shopping I need to do which I mislaid  somewhere and then I accidentally sent my friend a text by mistake and so the feeling that "I am losing it" or "going mad" was reinforced to me and now I just feel scared and alone. The rational side of me says that I am not losing it (I used my phone, then put it in my large coat pocket and put my hands in pockets so I think I just touched the screen a few times whilst it was unlocked but it must have looked weird from my end).

Anyway, I thought all my prayers would be answered by my HRT. Last week I felt great, went out dressed up and felt wonderful. The last few days and today I just feel back to square 1. This all started after a night out with some wine and a bad nights sleep which then carried on for a few days. Is this why women give up alcohol during the menopause?

My husband, who is being a really great support to me, sat and watched the Mariella 1-hour on the Menopause the other day. He remained me that I am taking HRT but have given up taking care of myself and I am not exercising like I used to. Before the school holidays I was running 10K 3 times a week and now do nothing.

So, my questions are:

1. Do you still have bad days on HRT?
2. Is it enough or do I need to also address my weight (put in 1.5 stone), do lots of exercise and drop alcohol and caffeine completely?

Sorry, for the miserable post!

[Nik2502]

Hi

We do still have bad times on HRT sadly it's not the elixir of life. The same happened to me after three fantastic months when I really thought I'd cracked it then back to square one.

I don't drink alcohol so don't know if it has an effect. I think our body's are all very different.

Maybe you need an increase which is our first thought but sometimes we need a decrease as our body's adjust.

All I can say is you're not alone. You aren't losing it. You aren't going insane. The support here is amazing.

You don't need give everything up - we need some joy in our lives! X

[SueLW]

You will have ups and downs, but they should level out a bit.  You might well need a bit more gel at the moment.  Try adding another half a pump and see if things feel a bit better.

Some women develop a kind of alcohol intolerance around this time of our lives.  I did.  1/2 a glass of red was making me drunk!  Literally.  I felt awful if I drank.  So I stopped.  I never drank much anyway.  I can now (on HRT) drink a moderate amount and I'm fine.  Other women find alcohol gives them a hot flush.  I don't have hot flushes so that never happened to me.  But if it gives you a flush and you feel awful whilst having them, then you may need to cut back or find out if other drinks affect you the same. 

Don't OD on caffein, but I'd not give it up either, unless it makes you anxious or flushed.  I don't drink caffein because it gave me bad palpitations.  I'd probably be OK on it now, but I've got used to my brands of decaf and I'm fine with them.

Chin up.  You will feel totally different in a day or two.  Possibly even less.

[Dancing Queen]

Yes I agree with Stellajane, I have had a great improvement on my mood with hrt but still feel like a "different" me to the one before the hormones crashed. It`s like I`ve been through a tunnel and come out the other side as a different person. I get ups and downs too luckily less downs since the hrt began. Don`t have a problem with alcohol luckily except it sometimes makes me hot in bed if I`ve drunk too much red wine. But I was always like that lol so just put up with it for the pleasure of a glass or two of the red stuff. 

[Kathleen]

Hello AngsanaBlossom.

I know exactly how you feel. I'm also on HRT but though improved I haven't managed to get off the meno roller coaster. I find the unpredictability of it all very distressing and now even the good days ( or more realistically, good parts of days )  are marred by the knowledge that it could all change in a heart beat.

No solutions for you I'm afraid but I feel your pain and you are not alone by any means. Btw I am just about to give up chocolate again! Probably won't help but at least I feel as if I'm doing something positive lol.

Take care.

K.

[Dancinggirl]

AngsanaBlossom - it sounds to me as though your body is missing the exercise. The endorphins produced with exercise can work wonders. HRT alone can't fix everything.
Get back to some exercise and cut down on portion size when eating and maybe limit your alcohol and caffiene - I bet you will then start to feel better.  DG x

[Hurdity]

I totally agree with the others - it's not all about HRT and women will be disappointed if they feel it is the answer to everything.

Yes to the exercise, diet improvement, losing weight, reducing caffeine and drastically reducing alcohol.

If I drink wine past 9 pm I get a migraine the next morning usually - unless out for a meal, and drink loads of water and have a strong esperesso at the end of the meal! It's a shock when you experience the change in alcohol tolerance but as long as you learn what your body can tolerate you can still enjoy a drink (although much less than before). I have most alcohol ( but not a lot) early in the evening and keep to Friday- Sunday mostly (except over Christmas and on holiday  ). I never have a full glass of wine so mine would be half a small glass to others' full one and always if in the pub or out at theatre arts centre etc would be the smallest glass size and/or weakest. Some red wines are 14.5%, but many whites are only 11 %. I drink a glass of water between each glass of wine - at least twice as much water to the wine I've drunk. You can tell I've got it down to a fine art!!  At least I don't get migraines from alcohol any more - well very rarely.

Hope this helps

Hurdity x

[AngsanaBlossom]

Well a few days after this I felt much better and was back to a more positive version of myself. I've had a good month. But I am back here again because it is day 3 of my cycle/ period and I feel the same way again! There is a pattern to this. I am not getting PMT like I used to, but instead once my period is a few days in I feel depressed and have massive anxiety like I did pre HRT. Seems weird to me.

[racjen]

Are you kidding? I feel like I'm yet to have more than two good days in a row on HRT....(

[helenmelon]

Hi AngsanaBlossom,

I started HRT exactly 12 months ago after years of Peri and about 18 months of hell!!

It had an immediate effect and by Christmas Day I felt back to my normal self,happy in control of my own brain and tear ducts 😀
However, I wonder if it's the effect of have very little estrogen for a long time and then getting what must be a big hit of hormones??? I felt great for about a month but it did level out and although in the main I'm overall much improved I still have odd days of brain fog, like your phone thing and some days when I start worrying about weird things again.

Like you I was fit before this started, gym, spinning, walking about 40k a week, but I spent about 14 months crying on the sofa and lost much of my fitness, but gradually since about June this year I've got back into it and I'm even having PT sessions and feeling so much better now that I'm exercising again.

I do think for me HRT has been good, although I still worry about the risks but I'd hate to think where I'd be without it this past year, but it isn't a cure all and I do believe if you slowly got back into exercise you'd feel much better. Just don't overdo it!!

Good luck x

[helenmelon]

Soz, also forgot to say (typical 🤪) the progesterone phase for me when I was on my first HRT Evorel Sequi was hell, so I've had a Mirena since May, no periods or PMT stlye symptoms since, although my hair appears to be suffering 🙄 but it's a smallish price to pay. But had a few issue with estrogen dose, don't know if I'll ever have the right amount!!

[EnglishRose]

Few things

I often get PMs right at the end of my period insomnia etc always have.
So it could be that.
Post Menstrual Tension\syndrome

It's more likely you need to increase. I've read a lot about HRT working then it stops working which indicates a time to increase it. Not sure why that happens but it's a thing.

If your still having cycles your own hormones fluctuate. I kind of hoped HRT would override my own hormones as I have two cycles a month (joy)

If you check my posts you'll see me having a bit of a “crisis” about the severe depression I wA feeling a few days ago. It wasn't my usual PMs it was deep deep depression. No ability to get joy from tv or reading just totally black.
Thankfully it onky lasted 24 hours and my normal PMS mood took its place (emotional teary but not black depression)
The last cycle (first since starting HRT) I had 5 days straight of that black depression was in bed the whole time.

I hope hrt is now starting to lift these blips before my period as twice a month sucks

If I was you I'd try increase one pump see how you feel, x good luck