Hi D666,
I've just seen this post today so don't know if you will see this reply, I will private message you later if you don't. I spoke about cognitive and memory issues on here a little while back, if you put my name in search you should probably find the threads. Although I haven't yet managed to get on to hrt without terrible side effects, so haven't been able to benefit from the advice I was given, apparently small doses of testosterone along with hrt can be the difference that makes the difference with cognitive issues. My gynae wants me to be on hrt first before trying it. Your gp is not going to give you it, it's not licensed for that use here, but a good gynae can. Mine was definitely open to it and my also menopausal sister on hrt has now tried it through a gynae and said it has made a huge difference. If you can I would suggest paying for a one off with a gynaecologist privately, but first check with their secretary if this is a treatment they're familiar with. No idea if you could get this on the NHS, maybe someone else will know.
Like you, I also do a job that requires constant brainpower. I am freelance and have been off work for months and feel utterly desperate. I would give anything for just a couple of days of having the brain I used to. The other thing I would check is vitamin B-12 levels and vitamin D. B-12 blood levels will not be accurate if you have taken supplements 4 months prior to testing, but B-12 deficiency can mess with your cognition. I was deficient a year ago, recently had a lot of B-12 injections after much wrangling with the gp, and am now going to a haemetologist (they are the consultants who know about it weirdly, a gp will know nothing) to see if they think it is still an issue. A book I read on memory by a specialist in the area said the vitamin he always suggests for memory is vitamin E at 400 to 100 IU a day. About to try this so can't comment on effectiveness. Someone else on here suggested another supplement, can't remember the name of it, you should find it in my posts. I think my chronic insomnia is a huge factor. I feel if I could just sleep through the night for a week it would help enormously. Lack of sleep impacts the hippocampus and stops the ability for it to consolidate and store memory. Also it obviously stops you thinking clearly. tiredness helps nothing. Sugar and refined carbs also impact my cognition.
If it helps I feel as you do and was so terrified I had dementia. I had testing done with a neurologist - mri and verbal tests - she said not dementia thank god, but the terror it could become that still lurks around in the background. I also suffer from migraine and think that is a big factor for me too. Migraine can impact cognition and memory and can worsen (mine has) with menopause.
I try to do mindfulness meditation and keep stress low, but it's hard when you feel like you have literally lost the mind you used to have. After twenty years in a high stress career, I studied for four years, alongside working, for another career I have always wanted to do. I qualified early in the summer, coming top of my year, and now, 6 months later, most days, I struggle to concentrate on anything for more than an hour and sometimes forget how the television remote works. I had no idea after all that hard work and effort, menopause was going to scupper my plans. It's been a big shock.
I have just come back to edit this as I forgot to say (no surprises there! ) that one thing the neuro said who was a specialist in early onset Alzheimer's is that most of the people she sees are unaware something is wrong, it is family and friends who notice first. In a nutshell they don't remember that they don't remember. I found that comforting as I am painfully aware of my cognitive and memory issues.