I keep a list on my phone so I can add to it as I need. It's getting quite long.
An adrenaline burst is seriously the best way to describe the 3 days leading up to feeling like this. The best way I could describe it to OH was that it was like how you feel after a confrontation or intense interaction...but it was continuous for 3 days. Then it turned into the sensations throughout the body...shortly after those started, my heart rate got back to normal (I drank some caffeine to relax me...I am that odd person), blood pressure has dropped back down and I still feel like my body is having more like icy water coursing through it...but sometimes warm...I actually do have some body aches today...maybe I am getting sick??
But it's never manifested like this! The upper chest feels heavy/tight today. And I can say the muscles feel a bit tight there as well. So I'm not sure if the feeling is just from the muscles or something. Back is out of alignment in between the shoulder blades. I have ongoing issues with that since teen years. Breathing is fine, no fever...oxygen levels good...just tight. So probably a combo of things. Throat feels odd....like horrible hay fever. This has happened quite regularly in the last few months. I'm going to try benadryl. Maybe it'll help me take a nap as I'm completely exhausted today. Today is definitely fatigue! Maybe awful PMS/PMT going on??. Just an all around disaster right now. Already got all teary this morning over it all. But is it the awful feeling body or the hormones? Or just all of it.
It's all hormones....I'm blaming everything on hormones now. Nothing else in my body is off and I've felt worst than even when this all started since stopping the contraceptive pill. I'm getting more and more unstable emotionally and physically. So even with absolutely nothing wrong, I feel worse and worse and closer to death....or maybe just feeling like death would be a nice break! (don't worry....not depressed to where I want to end it or anything...just depressed to the point of wanting to cry my eyes out). I don't do well being so out of sync with my body. It's now this odd foreign object to me that is acting erratically with my head attached to it. I'm trying so hard to be patient....just waiting for that appointment to hopefully FINALLY give me answers and solutions. But it seems a lifetime away when I feel like this. I just want some relief...just a break so that I can regroup and be able to handle more.
I so understand my friend. She told the doctor somebody was going to die soon if she didn't get some relief....her or him..
(She had a good relationship with this doctor) But I get it sooo much! I feel almost at that point and by Wednesday who knows!
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Topic: Need comfort....or something (Read 1481 times)