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[Antigone]

Hello there,

I am new to menopause and new to Menopause Matters! I am 46 and was confirmed as in menopause two months ago, having not had a period for a year. My hot flushes began in the middle of a heatwave! 

I have been on Evorel Sequi for two months. It's probably too soon to tell but the flushes do seem to have reduced, though I have had a persistent, low level headache and also had a two week bleed. I suspect the headache was caused by the HRT. It began as a migraine and then never really went away. I'm keeping a diary so that I have all the information available when I see my GP for my three-month review.

What I was wondering is, has anyone had time off work due to the symptoms of the menopause? How do you cope with the anxiety of menopause, hot flushes, sleeplessness AND work?

Any advice gratefully received!

Antigone

[Golden retriever]

Hi Antigone
I was diagnosed eventually after 3 years of tests of having early menopause, very frustrating to say the least in February 2017.
Went on hrt in March and became anxious in late April.
It came on all of a sudden and really was embarrassing as it happened while telling students of the rules of an exam INFRONT of not only the students but 2 other teachers.
I became nervous while speaking and just got through it as best I could.

I passed it off to one of the teachers as ‘sorry but think I had too much coffee that morning.'
To be fair and looking back, I was working way too hard and with my hormones all over the place and stress included, my body couldn't deal with it.

Today I have to be more aware of what I drink and eat, excercise and now I have given up my Saturday job (already working mon-fri) as have to look at the stressors in my life. Since that day every time I go into a classroom I become a little anxious, because I think of that day. The best technique that works for me is to challenge the anxiety and say ‘I'm sick of you anxiety, do your worst.'
This automatically gets me in fight mode instead of flight mode and seems to help. Drinking plenty of water also helps and I can use the bottle of water as my crutch in class.

My advice to you would be to work and keep busy but not to the point that I did it where you have no time for YOU.
BE GOOD to yourself, work but at a pace that you can deal with, reward yourself every week whether it is with a trip to the cinema with friends or going for a spa day once a month.
Concentrate on you and take every week one day at a time.
I overthink, am always thinking ahead (maybe my life as a veterinary nurse added to this) but these can lead to anxiety and to be fair there is enough anxiety that comes with menopause instead of adding to it.
I hope this helps
Take care
Golden retriever

[Dancinggirl]

Sadly many women do struggle with work when meno hits. There needs to be more awareness of the problems women face.
Paring things back and finding time for relaxation is vital at this time in our lives - and this is not easy.
The government want us to work till we are 66 and beyond but don't give us the support we need to do this!! 
Hrt, small, regular, highly nutritious, meals and lots of brisk walking with Mindfulness thrown in for good measure AND say no to things you don't not want to do. DG x

[pricey]

Hi all,
I struggle too. I do lots of varied shifts (support worker). I have just discovered all workplaces should have a Menopause policy. (Read it somewhere in relation to Unison). Our employer has no such policy. Given that 50% of our team is probably peri/menopausal this needs addressing. Migraines, flushes, flooding etc, not to mention mood swings and brain fog make work a challenge!

x

[Antigone]

Thank you all for your advice and support! Even though I've been to a Menopause Cafe and my mum, at 67, is still having hot flushes, it's all too easy to feel like this is happening only to me, especially as none of my friends are menopausal. I don't know what I expected the menopause to feel like, but looking back I think I expected the physical effects to be more significant than the emotional and psychological effects and I see now that the hot flushes are the very, very tip of an enormous iceberg. Coming to terms with the menopause is a profound life experience, or is it for me at least. Apparently some women sail through it...   

My manager is being really supportive -- reading between the lines of a recent conversation I think she is also menopausal -- and has said if I need to go home and work from home, or just leave early because I'm having a bad day, then it's fine for me to do so. But I am inclined to work 12 hour days and that's what I need to stop doing. I need to have exercise and rest time in the evenings. Walking makes me feel better and helps clear the head fog. I need to be more disciplined and remind myself that the work will still be there tomorrow and the world won't stop turning because I didn't reply to an email until the next day!

I'm also going to start saying NO to things I don't want to do. That's a brilliant thing to say, Dancing Girl, and I feel almost like this conversation has given me permission to do that!? I just feel like... I have enough going on with what I have in my life -- and I don't want anymore. As my mum says about menopause, some days you just feel like you can't be bothered with anything.

Antigone x

[racjen]

Hi Antigone, you are not alone - I've been off work for nearly 9 months with severe anxiety and depression, result of sudden menopause due to chemotherapy for breast cancer 2 years ago. I'm supposed to be starting a phased return next week, and although my workplace and colleagues are extremely supportive (I work in a library) I just don't know how I'm going to cope - I don't actually feel significantly better than I did 9 months ago, I just can't afford to be off work any longer or, even worse, lose my job. I simply can't believe how badly the menopause has affected every aspect of my life - emotionally, mentally, socially - in fact the physical side is the only bit I'm not struggling with, as HRT sorted the hot flushes and joint pains almost immediately.