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[Mabram]

Hi everyone I am fairly new to this forum and was wondering if anyone (I'm sure there are many of you)  are in the same situation as me.  I am 46 years old and I started on Femseven Sequi patches 3 weeks ago mainly due to anxiety, Dr wanted to put me on antidepressants but I insisted I thought it was perimenopause and asked to go on to Hrt (my Mum went through menopause early and with all of the symptoms I had, everything pointed to peri). I started my second phase 2 patch yesterday.  I have now been off work on and off since February and although this week I have been having more good days than bad I am still struggling.  I cry an awful lot sometimes uncontrollably and just don't feel like myself.  I feel,like I've lost my confidence, don't feel able to go out, feel quite nervous a lot of the time, definitely can't manage work. I do seem better when i keep myself busy and my Parents have been really good and try to get me out with them most days but I can't keep busy all of the time and find myself getting really down when I'm not busy. I know I have to give HRT time and it can take 3 to 6 months to feel the full effects but will this anxiety ever get better? I have days when I feel good, confident and feel I'm getting somewhere but then others where I just don't think I can do it, can't see a way through and don't know what to do with myself other than cry. Just wondered if there is someone who has been through this and does it get better? I am also on Propanalol to help with the anxiety and I think it does help but obviously with the physical side and not the mental side of anxiety.  I should be having some counselling soon but am just waiting to hear from them as to when that will be.  I am so fed up and just don't feel myself, it's such a scary place and I really do feel quite alone even though I have my hubby, daughter, Mum and Dad who are so supportive I still feel so alone . Any advice, experiences or just kind words and encouragement would be so appreciated as I feel so sad 😢😢😢.

[helenmelon]

Hi Mabram,

You can be safe in the knowledge you're not alone. I had every symptom under the sun including massive anxiety which I'd never experienced before.

Feeling not like yourself is exactly what I told my GP, I knew I didn't have depression but I couldn't stop crying and feeling helpless and hopeless when everything in my life was good!!

I've been on HRT since December last year and felt better very quickly and although it's not perfect (getting the progesterone dose right is proving difficult)
Hang in there with the HRT it does work but you need to give it time.

[Mabram]

Hi Helenmelon,

Thank you for your reply. I just really struggle with the anxiety like you say I don't feel it's depression although the longer the anxiety goes on I do feel like I am starting to feel depressed, my life was good until this all started out of the blue in January. I just want to feel normal, want to enjoy my life the way I was doing and do things that everyone else is managing to do. I hate for my family to see me crying nearly all of the time but that is the only way I deal with things right now. Really hoping the HRT will improve things, I am starting to feel better on it like I have said I am having more good days than bad but it just such a long process. I'm glad the HRT Is working for you and really hope you get the progesterone side of it sorted. It is a very confusing time and I am glad there are people like you on here to talk to. Thank you, I will hang in there and we will get better and start getting life back to some kind of normality.

[Tiddles]

Hi Mabram.  Anxiety was my worst symptom too and the reason I finally asked for HRT.  Like you I was offered anti-depressants but I was insitent and got my own way in the end.  I have been on HRT tablets for 3 months now and like Helenmelon am still tinkering with the progesterone part to get that right but I wanted to reply to your post to tell you that 3 months in my anxiey has gone.  If I feel anxious now there's an actual reason (eg being cut up in the car , that kind of thing) and I can cope with that as I did all my life before menopause.  But gone is the 'reason-less', hormone fuelled, physical anxiety that woke me in the night or sat over me during the day and was ruining my life. 

So hang in there.  There is hope.  Very best wishes to you x

[Hurdity]

Hi Mabram

 

Sorry to hear you are struggling.

What has you cycle been doing for the past year or so leading up to your asking for HRT? Is your cycle regular or has it gone awry, or maybe you have started skipping periods? This gives a clue as to where you are in menopause - on average. Not sure why you were given propanolol if your anxiety is hormonal as it is best to sort it out with hormones first if it started out of the blue and unrelated to life events. Docs are too quick to hand out meds! BBs like prop.. lower blood pressure and as reported on here can be difficult to come off. However at least they are helping for the time being!

If it's any consolation - I cried buckets when peri-menopausal and even before this when my periods were still regular but leading up to peri. I have mentioned several times elsewhere that I would find myself welling up if someone said something - I became over-sensitive, or just thinking about something as I was driving. I barely shed a tear now ( thankfully nothing has happened that I need to) - but I didn't need to before either most of the time!

It DOES get better but these are turbulent times hormonally! There are ways to suppress the cycle if you find the mood swings and emotional effects the most trying - such as a couple of combi CCP types that contain the same oestrogen as HRT (not the synthetic types) - QLAIRA and ZOELY - but you would need to be able to tolerate the progestogen.

Good advice from the others to give it time before changing to a different type - and in the meantime just let the tears come - try and have a laugh about it with your family when the "attack" is over so they know it is not the real you. Your daughter especially should understand - depending how old she is - because she will also be experiencing the hormonal surges and falls of the menstrual cycle.

Hope you manage to sort it out and do let us know - come on here and post any time and there will always be someone here to comment and give support

Hurdity x

[helenmelon]

Hi Mabram,

I'm sure as time goes on the good days will become the norm 🤞🏻My anxiety meant that I could hardly even drive and I can assure you that wasn't me at all, it hits you hard and out of the blue with no reason, it's truly awful.

I have found this forum fabulous, there's always someone to ask about things which only someone going through this hormone hell would understand 🤔

Here's hoping each day is better for us all xx

[Mabram]

Hi Tiddles,

Thank you for your kind reply.  It is really re-assuring to know that things have improved for you after being on hrt for 3 months. I do feel like I am improving in some ways but on my down days I can't see that and just feel like I'm never going to get better. Its the constant rollercoaster of anxiety that is proving quite difficult to cope with. I have always thought that I was a fairly confident person but lately I feel like a nervous wreck, I get that butterflies feeling in my stomach before I go out and just don't feel able to organise outings, don't really want to go out, feel so vague and sometimes all I can do is sit here an stare in to space, it's just not me.  It is ruining my life so thank you for giving me hope that things will improve, it means a lot. Can I ask what problems you are having with the progesterone as I seem to feel better in the last 2 weeks where I have both Oestrogen and progesterone although have been more tearful and feel more depressed yesterday and today. Having said that it is only my first month, will be interesting to see what happens next week when I'm on Oestrogen only again x

[Mabram]

Hi Hurdity,

Thank you for your kind reply.  My cycle has been fairly eratic for a while, if I look from Jan 2017 some months I went 2 weeks, sometimes it was 6, Dec 2017 I didn't have a period at all then January 2018 only 12 days gap, then February nothing at all, March only 2 weeks gap but it wasn't until just after Christmas that I started to feel unwell.  I had a few days of feeling sick and felt dizzy, I felt very weak on my right hand side and I had a dull ache on my right hand side just below my ribs which a Dr thought it may gallstones. My Dr thought I was very anxious because of the possibility I may have gallstones and put me on Propanalol to help until we could put my mind at rest after a ultrasound scan (which was all clear).It was my daughters 21st in January and we had a big weekend in London planned and I was a little concerned that I was going to ruin it and not be able to go which the Dr thought was making me very anxious but once the weekend came and went it was clear that this was not why I was anxious and something more was going on.  I went back to the Drs and they prescribed me Setraline which I was to take 1/2 a tablet a day for a week and then move up to 1 tablet a day - well I only managed to take 1/2 a tablet and after a few hours felt so ill, diarrhoea like I've never had before and my head shaking on both the outside and inside so I didn't take anymore of those and said I would find another way. It was me that asked the Dr If she thought it could be menopause as my Mum had gone through the menopause early and when I looked through all of the symptoms of peri-menopause sure enough most of my symptoms led to it being peri so I said I would like to try HRT. It took me a while to get the Dr to agree and let me have the HRT as she said she wanted to get my anxiety under control first which is why She has kept me on on the Propanalol, my Dr said that the HRT would only help with hot flushes (which I wasn't having too many of)  and vaginal dryness (which I wasn't having) but I had read that HRT could help with the Anxiety so I wanted to try. It is the anxiety and the crying all of the time that I am really struggling with but I am living in hope that things will get better this is only the first month after all I am just not very good at feeling ill and not very patient. I really want to get back to work but can't do that until I can manage the anxiety, not feel so nervy and not cry all the time. Thank you so much for your support, you have been a great help x

[helenmelon]

Hi Mabram,

I'm on Evorel 50, so have 2 weeks oestrogen and then 2 weeks both oestrogen and progesterone. I feel fantastic on the oestrogen but after 2 days with the progesterone my boobs are like enormous rocks😩 and I feel very fat and bloated, also very tired. My GP and the private menopause consultant said I should have the mirena coil as it's a less harsh than the northisterone in the patch, but I've had one before and wasn't keen, but I've decided to give it a go so will be having one put in (sounds like I'm getting a new oven 😂😂) in 2 weeks.

HRT definitely helped my crying and anxiety and I had bad flushes, waking in the night in a pool of sweat 😓 they started to improve after 3 or 4 days and I only seem to have them occasionally and it's when I'm on the progesterone patch.

I think it's a case of trying different types of HRT if one doesn't suit. I would recommend visiting a menopause clinic if you find that your HRT isn't working as you like as they are the experts and a lot of GP's don't seem up to date with HRT although mine is great thankfully, but is the only one in 9 doctors at my practice who seems switched on.

Be kind to yourself and try not to worry, I know easier said than done 🙂

[Tiddles]

Hi Mabram.  During the progesterone phase of the first month I had a banging headache that lasted 5 days that paracetamol (which usually works for me) wouldn't touch.  I also felt nauseous and dizzy.  During the progesterone phase of the second month these symptoms occurred again plus an upset stomach although as my apetite for crap food goes off the scale during the progesterone phase this may be what's causing the upset stomach!  The dizziness got worse the second month - sometimes I was staggering as if I'd just jumped off a playground roundabout. Also, bad period pains and heaviness in the legs. The progesterone phase this past, third month (which has just ended) has also seen my mood worsen - still no return of the anxiety attacks thank god but a very low "what is the point?" mood some days.  This may of course be caused by the physical symptoms - nausea and dizziness are horrible to live with :-(

So I started on the oestrogen phase of my new tablets today and already feel physically better and much happier and more positive and optimistic :-)  I will post how I get on under another thread entitled Femoston in a month's time.

I keep a detailed symptom diary which I've found really useful to understand what's going on.  I have a column for each symtom and the dates down the page on the left hand side and mark on a scale of 1-5 how bad each symptom was the day before. I then highlight in red when a symptom is both bad and persists for more than 3 days.  I would recommend you keep a version of a symptom diary yourself - it's been a real eye opener for me.  I also took a print out of this to my GP to persuade him to let me change my tablets.  Several of the ladies on here explained to me that Norethisterone - the type of progesterone in my original tablets - is notoriously hard to tolerate.  It's also the cheapest form of progesterone so, as I am very cynical about the motivations of some GPs in terms of what they prescribe I went armed with as much information as possible to support my case for changing tablets when I went for my HRT review appointment a couple of weeks ago!

Please keep us posted as to how things are with you - I've found it so helpful to learn from others' experiences and to know that I am far from alone! x

[Mabram]

Hi helenmelon,

I am happy that your hrt has really helped with the anxiety and the crying.  I am at the moment on the second week of the Oestrogen and Progesterone patch and have seemed to get on better with these patches than I did with the oestrogen only ones although the test will be next week when I start back on those again, will be interesting to see how I feel then. My boobs are too letting me know that they are there (which is quite a surprise considering how tiny they are) 😀! I am very down and tearful today but I have got period pain and have started today so I'm hoping that that is what that is. I do really despair and wonder if I am strong enough to deal with this, I'm just not me and this constant is this right, should this be happening and feeling rubbish is just so hard.  It's hard sticking with the hrt not knowing if it's helping or not but unfortunately you have to give it time to work that out, I just want it to help with the anxiety, I think there has been some improvement so I can only hope the improvement will continue otherwise like you say it may be a case of trying a different type of hrt. I am just on a rollercoaster of feeling good then feeling down and would just like to feel good for a while now x

[Mabram]

Hi Tiddles,

Poor you it really does sound like you are struggling with the progesterone phase of the HRT. So far I haven't had too many problems with the progesterone phase, I haven't really felt any ill effects although my mood is not so good I can feel so low and then ok although I didn't seem as bad last week, my period started today and the period pain is not so good so that's probably not helping with that. I did have severe headaches, nausea and dizziness when I started on the Oestrogen only patches so know exactly where you are coming from when you say how horrible that is to live with so will be interesting to see what happens next week when I go back on to those again, I was hoping they were side effects and that maybe this will be better on the second month but we will see.  The symptom diary sounds like a good idea, I do write a diary every day but might be worth me making it more detailed with symptoms. I will keep you all posted about how I am getting on and you're right it is so helpful to learn from others experiences and know that I am not alone. Thank you for taking the time to reply to me, it really does mean a lot x