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[ElkWarning]

The nurse at my GPs recommended this board to me.

I'm 49, work full time, married 27 years, have 3 kids (youngest 21), graduated with an MA in February after going to uni as a mature student to do undergrad and said MA ... I feel as if I should be super fine, but instead I'm all over the place.  The things I find most difficult to deal with are the crushing anxiety, massive sense of self loathing / worthlessness and rage.  I alternate between really very capable and wanting to hide in a cave.

In an attempt to 'get better', I've recently made some lifestyle changes, have taken up swimming on a Friday mornings, seen the Dr about a bunch of little niggles (Is this mole ok?  Why can't I get rid of this athletes foot?  My bowel is compromised by years of IBS could you take a look?) and smoke and drink less.  I start CBT on Tuesday.

I have a difficult relationship with my body, mainly because I had an undiagnosed problem for 10 years that made me very ill - womb stoma, bled out, wasn't believed.  Had a Mirena coil fitted in 2014 which has helped.  No periods for about 18 months.  This means I really don't know where I am menopause wise.  Some times I heat up a lot, other times I don't.  Hair thinned a bit, cut it short, seems fine now.  Dry in all the wrong places, have discovered the joys of almond oil.

I don't really know what I'm looking for.  I want something to change, something to happen that's not utterly terrifying, or fuelled by some strange kind of grief anger.  I don't want to be this person any more.  I want myself back.

Anyway, hi, and this is an awfully big boat we all seem to be in.

[Kathleen]

Hello ElkWarning and welcome to the forum.

Much of what you say resonates with me and will be familiar with many ( perhaps all ) the ladies on this site.

I'll leave it to the expert MM ladies to advise you about treatment options but I wanted to say hello and I love your comment about our large boat, I'm tempted to call it a sinking ship but one mustn't be defeatist lol.

Take care and keep posting.

K.

[Dancinggirl]

ElkWarning - welcome to the club.  You are describing what so many women feel when meno hits.  Read all the info on this site to get clued up. 
The Mirena is great as it controls bleeding and protects the womb lining.  I'd pop to the doctor and ask foe bloods to be done to check FSH and oestrogen levels - though blood tests don't always give a true picture in the peri meno stage, this may show that your hormones are dropping and a bit of oestrogen might work wonders. As you have the Mirena in place, you only need oestrogen and not combined HRT which is a real bonus.

Yep, it's a big boat - all women get to climb aboard - some will sail along easily but around 50% will have problems along the way, often for many years.  WE are here to support each other.  DG x

[Lanzalover]

Hi ElkWarning


   and climb aboard.


DG has given some good advice re oestrogen. Have a look around the forum and ask any questions you may have everyone here is very helpful.


Lanzalover x

[ElkWarning]

Thanks, ladies.