Hi DaisyB-
You've certainly got your work cut out. No wonder you're feeling crap. You've done the right thing by getting to see a specialist and getting the Mirena coil and oestrogen. You'll ideally need to give this regime 3 months to see if it works. It may have to be tweaked.
It is all hormonal by the sound of it. I'm assuming that in addition to the HRT side, you're getting treatment for your under active thyroid and low iron? You must have been feeling rough indeed.
On the meno side, your symptoms all sound pretty par for the course and unfortunately a lot of GPs just don't understand the severity of symptoms and effect they can have. It's a vicious circle and anxiety and stress can make all of the symptoms worse. There are separate thread on here about IBS so have a read. Might be worth also pointing your partner in the direction of the men's section of the site and get him to sign up for the online training course that's about to launch ( earlier posting today)
It is horrible- you've got a lot going on and it may take a while to feel better. Listen to your body, don't try to do too much and enlist your family's help. Be kind to yourself- it won't last forever x