I totally get you Nickie and 5 years ago when peri started for me I felt exactly the same. I hate reading websites where they say it's natural and many women embrace the fact there's no worry of pregnancy anymore. Total bloody BS as far as I am concerned. And I've often wondered what the real suicide rate is of menopausal women who despair they'll never find themselves again.
I don't sit and think too deep about it anymore, it is what it is, unless they come up with ovary donation or transplants or a drug that reverses it there's no fighting it. Does it affect some women more than others ? For sure ! Which women suffer more ? Is it women who were loving life and were full of life ? Or women who had relatively quiet mundane lives? I don't think there's any difference to be honest. I feel robbed of who I was, vibrant, a figure people raved about, pretty, confident, sociable, you name it I pretty much had it going for me. Menopause has stripped me of my hair, skin, gums, figure, wellbeing, libido.... I could go on and on!
But what I do know is, I continue to fight and search for the magic formula that can turn my life around to at least a new acceptable level that I can enjoy my life again anxiety free.
Keep searching, keep researching, keep trialling different methods (giving each an acceptable amount of time) and never give up !
Massive hugs XX