AHG - you may feel well but you had 2 specialists telling you they were very concerned about your bones and that diet and exercise weren't going to restore things. At 56 it is vital to try to stem to the further decline in your bones. You really don't want the devastating effects of osteoporosis, so some treatment is a good idea.
I believe the risk of ovarian cancer is very small with HRT and you have had investigations which show the cyst you did have has disappeared. It is worth discussing the family link with a specialist - a GP will not necessarily know what your risks are and may air on the side of caution and advice not to use HRT - GPs tend to be very wary of HRT I'm afraid and rarely recognise the benefits. I don't believe Cysts necessarily mean you will be more prone to ovarian cancer.
All treatments have risks and side effects but HRT does bring many benefits as it is HORMONE REPLACEMENT THERAPY, not a drug, so, to some degree it infuses the body with hormones that make our body function as it did in our reproductive years and, for our bones, oestrogen improves and maintains bone density.
BTW you still need to get enough calcium, VitaminD and magnesium regardless of what your doctors say. Sunshine is the best way of getting vitamin D so in winter you do need a supplement - my brother-in-law is a leading gastroenterologist and insists we all take Vit D in winter.
I think the point is, you possibly need to try the HRT for a few months - hopefully the Elleste will suit you and you won't need to experiment with different HRT types. After 6-12 months they will hopefully suggest another DEXA scan to look at how your bones are doing - is the HRT helping enough or do you need extra treatment.
I mentioned what my friend is going through, at the same age as you - a simple slip and fall on her bottom put her in a wheelchair for some weeks - she wouldn't want anyone to go through that.
DG x