Hi Everyone
I hope I'm posting in the right topic area (New Members) and apologise if not
I'm 46 (ok nearly 47) and like a lot of you quite frankly having an awful time of it. In retrospect I've had peri symptoms at least 2 years but the past few months have been so hard. My female gp put me on Evorel Conti 50 and also recommended the mirena (still need contraception, though no sex drive which is probably the most effective contraception ever
). After some thought I have decided to have the mirena fitted (in a couple of weeks) and my hrt will then be changed to just estrogen only as progesterone will be delivered locally via mirena. My gp gave me a Menopause Matters card saying it was really good and very helpful - and it certainly is, so after a month of reading other posts from you lovely lot have decided to post something myself.
The first thing I will say is that I didnt expect or understand peri\meno could be this bad and I apologise in advance for the long list of things Im about to put - I just need to write it all down somewhere. I'm having physical symptoms - Extreme exhaustion that comes on very suddenly. I ache everywhere, especially in a morning. Feet, legs, back, hips, elbows, shoulders hurt. Very itchy skin, headaches, nausea (especially in a morning), become allergic/sensitive to things I never used to be (get hay fever now), dizziness, tingling, facial pain/pressure, loss of labido, vaginal dryness, hair on head gone "weird" and growing very slowly (unlike the rest of my new hairs, all growing places I don't want and like they are on some time lapse clip on youtube they grow that fast
). Pelvic/ovarian area pain, sore painful boobs. I think I'll stop there! The only thing, and I am so grateful for this, is that I do not experience many hot flushes - I did go through a time of these a couple years back but didn't make any connection that it could be peri. I do get some and when they happen they are awful so I take my hat off to all you poor ladies out there who suffer badly and regularly with them. Genuinely feel lucky this isn't much of an issue for me
My worst symptoms and the ones I find the hardest are the psychological/mood problems. I am experiencing extreme anxiety and panic attacks along with very low mood. Very tearful - it comes out of nowhere and have no control over it. Feelings of extreme irritation and anger and Im on a very short fuse. Forgetfullness, cant concentrate or retain information,I don't want to leave the house or see anybody (Im ok with hubby) this is very unlike me previously I was a very sociable person. I want to hide away and never be seen again. I actually feel like I want to run away, but dont know where to go and havent got the energy to do it. I feel old, ugly, unattractive and irrelevant. I don't have any children and I'd got ok with this and wasnt an issue. Recently however it is upsetting me greatly, I feel like Ive lost something even though I never had it, like a grief almost. I don't want to have a child now but I cant stop crying about it. It has got to the point where Im currently on sick leave from work with anxiety/panic attacks. I work in reception of an nhs walk-in clinic that is extremely busy. I really like my job and feel very settled and great colleagues and normally enjoy the face to face aspect of the job with the public. However when Im feeling anxious and particulary when I dont want to see anyone (or anyone see me) its very hard to have to sit there as first point of contact and my anxiety and distress really rise. Summing it all up Id put it like its having severe PMS All the time and like an alien has invaded my head and body. I hate feeling like this and I hate what I have become. My hubby is very understanding and Im very fortunate in this way as I seriously dont know what I do if he wasnt. I feel sorry for him, cause at times Im a total nightmare and my suffering is causing him suffering too - I also worry about us splitting up - but then I worry about everything and there is actually no indication/signs of this.
Along with hrt and mirena I have taken some steps to help myself - I have been eating healthy for 3 weeks and have lost 8 lbs - although I need to lose weight this is a bonus as I am mainly eating to help my symptoms and not for weight loss). I have started some yoga which I am enjoying - trying to get the oomph/confidence to attend a class at some point. Basically anything I can do to help myself feel better as I feel so dreadful. Reading posts on here is a great help, glad that Im not alone (esp with mood problems) and seeing that things can get better is a comfort. I'm sorry for the long post, I just had to get it out of my system and if you've still made it up to here reading my rantings - thank you very much
Its a very hard journey and I wish you all well and great to have a forum like this.
Thank you lovelies
Kim
