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[Ruthio77]

Hi all,

 Another newbie here. :-)

 My name is Ruth and I'm 38.

 I had the Mirena coil for 17 years after the birth of my son (not the same one lol) but decided to have it removed last summer. I never had periods on the coil and just felt I should 'reset' my body. My fiancé was happy to take care of the contraception side of things so i went for it. 10 months on and still no period. At first I thought it was just a side effect of the mirena removal. Then there was the inevitable pregnancy paranoia. (Lots and lots of pound shop pregnancy tests purchased!) it wasn't til about a month ago I even considered it might be anything to do with menopause. Now it's all starting to click into place. I do suffer from hot flushes,restless sleep and night sweats but I hadn't really made the connection. I'm quite a hot person anyway, and I'm one of life's blushers ( I get embarrassed about everything!). I have been a bit distracted lately, and just don't feel quite like I'm as on the ball as I have previously been. I have just put that down to tiredness really. I had some blood tests last week and the came back with elevated FSH levels (i didn't think to ask the actual figure, I was a bit dumbstruck, I fully expected the blood tests to show nothing at all and for it to just be some weird anomaly) I know there's not a diagnosis yet, I have to go back in a month for the second test, but I've mentally decided that that's it. After no periods for this long, I can't see what's gonna change in a month. It's weird. my sister said, 'oh well, you don't want any more children anyway', my fiancé said 'yay I won't have to use condoms anymore'. Am I being over sensitive to think, actually this is quite a big deal? I'm getting married in five weeks, I only had the one child, my fiancé doesn't have any. Although we didn't officially want to have any children (my son is off to uni is September, we want to get a campervan and go off galavanting around the country with the dog at weekends) the choice would be nice. All my friends are still having children left right and centre. I'm not really sure what I expect anyone to say to me, or how I'm supposed to feel. The ironic thing is, I had the coil removed because I wanted to feel "more like a woman". Seems that's backfired a bit.
 Anyway, sorry for the long post, I just wanted to write it all down really :-)

[CLKD]

 

Acceptance can be difficult even if you had decided not to have another child.  Being plunged into 'the change' can cause a few wobbles …….   However, your fiancé should continue with contraception for at least another 6 months ……. some ladies get a bleed even after not having periods for a while  . Would you at 38 really want all the nappies etc.? 

What you describe sounds 'within normal limits' from where I'm sitting  - we have threads about memory loss, 'doing stupid things' etc..  Have a look at the Daisy web-site too, link here somewhere.  We have topics on most issues too.

Browse round. Make notes!

[Dancinggirl]

Ruthio77 - what a shock for you.  I had a premature meno in my 30s and it certainly can be difficult to come to terms with. You will need to use HRT to protect your heart and bones in the long term and if you are about to get married then some oestrogen will help to stop any vaginal atrophy and bladder problems that may emerge due to oestrogen deficiency. 
My suggestion would be to have another Mirena, as it suited you before, and then simply add in some oestrogen as patch or in gel form as this will be the simplest option.  There are other pills and patches you can use but often the progesterone can be tricky, so it's a matter of trial and error till you find the right HRT balance. I bet you will feel loads better when you get some oestrogen. Do read up all the info on this site - we are here to support you so do keep posting and let us know how you get on. Dg x

[CLKD]

   too ……….. 

[Kathleen]

Hello Ruthio77 and welcome to the forum.

It seems you've had your future decided for you in a way you hadn't expected.

One of my neighbours began with eratic periods in her early forties and I recall how sad she was that she couldn't have more children. She says she didn't actually want to have a baby but she kept thinking there should be another place at the table and it felt wrong that a chair was empty. As I recall she spoke to a counselor about it and then felt better.

Perhaps you can find some therapy that helps you deal with your new situation and move on.

This journey can be a bit bumpy for some of us, especially at the beginning but we all adapt in time.

Take care and keep posting.

K.

[Ruthio77]

Thanks all. I'm getting my head around it, kind of, ish. At least now I can try to deal with it it some way. I shall keep reading the posts and try to get as much info as I can about the whole thing as I can. I'm sure it'll all work out in the end, what's the worst that can happen? 😀

[Ruthio77]

So, I finally got the results of both my blood tests. FSH levels are at 127. GP says I'm post menopausal. I have no idea how long this has been the case, the mirena may have masked it for years. I'm stumped it's fair to say. Have to have bone density scans and stuff. Doc wants to put a new mirena in and prescribe patches. I'm getting married on Friday and off in honeymoon on Sunday. Should I have it done beforehand or when I get back?

[CLKD]

I'd be inclined to wait ;-).    Others may differ.

   +    +   

[we have a holiday thread ;-) ]

[Ruthio77]

:-) thank you, I'm trying not to let this mess with my happiness in other parts of my life, but it's a bit of a struggle. I agree, I've got this far,what's a few more weeks? My libido is a tad reduced, but he'll just have to try a bit harder I guess, welcome to married life lol 😀

[Cassie]

You will be fine I also went over @ around 38, perhaps the Oral Contraceptive Pill may make you feel less post menopausal, strange as it seems! I was on that till 40 then went onto the rub on gel and the Utrogestan, many  yrs later and still loving this combo, its not the end of the world, you are still young and gorgeous and have a life time ahead of you, but do take the HRT your body needs it at least, for the next 10 to 12 yrs....all the best!

[Dancinggirl]

Ruthio77 - It's really good you have been diagnosed properly now, as being oestrogen deficient for any length of time at your age could have long term consequences for your health.  AS you have done well with the Mirena in the past this is really good - having another fitted and then adding in oestrogen as patch or gel is a very good option and should give you minimal, if any, problems and protects your heart, bones and bladder for the long term - adding in the oestrogen should help with libido and maintain a healthy vagina which will be important as you are getting married.  Oesrogen will help with energy and sleep etc. so you should feel generally better.
I believe the Estradot patches are the easiest to use as they are small and stick well.  I have always used Oestrogel which you apply everyday but many women prefer patches - it's trial and error.  Make sure you have at least a 50mg patch - you will need at least this dose. I'd get the HRT and Mirena done a.s.ap. to get those oestrogen levels up and start your marriage on a good footing.
I'm sure you will feel better soon - I know it's been a shock but I'm 60 now and if I hadn't been diagnosed in my late 30s and given HRt then I dread to think what i'd be like now.  Keep us posted  Dg x

[Mary G]

Ruthio77, it must have been a shock to find out your are post menopause.  I had a similar experience aged 44 and I also had a Mirena coil at the time.

Firstly, I really would urge you to use Oestrogel instead of patches.  When I first started HRT I already had a Mirena coil and added a 50mcg patch and it was completely useless.  I then went up to 75mcg and finally 100mcg and still it was no good and I really didn't like going around with a patch stuck to my backside.  Also, I was not absorbing enough oestrogen and blood tests confirmed it.  To cut a long story short, I then had the coil removed and went onto Oestrogel and it was so much more effective.  I am on the Professor Studd regime of 2 pumps of gel everyday, tiny bead of testosterone everyday and 7 x 100mg Utrogestan (progesterone used vaginally) every 5 weeks. 

You obviously get on well with the Mirena coil which is good but you are very young and I think you need to have as much flexibility in your HRT regime as possible.  The gel is easy to use, you just rub it onto your skin, it is bone dry in a couple of minutes and you can easily adjust the dose up or down to suit your needs.  Although the progesterone in the Mirena is supposed to be confined to the womb, enough of it gets out into your overall system to affect the oestrogen.  Therefore, because of your age and having the coil, I think you would do extremely well on 3 pumps of gel.  You might also want to look into the idea of testosterone. 

You are only 38 and just about to get married and I think that Oestrogel is much nicer for you to use than the patches.  You are going to be taking HRT for many years and I would suggest you start with gel and in the (highly) unlikely event that you don't get on with it, you can then change to patches.

Under the exceptional circumstances, do you think your doctor would agree to your starting oestrogen immediately without the coil?  You could get cracking straightaway with oestrogen (don't worry about side effects) and then have the coil fitted after your honeymoon.  It's worth asking.

In the meantime, why not have a look Professor Studd's website.  He is the world's leading hormone expert and specialises in PMS and menopause.  I am pretty sure he would prescribe a good long stint of Oestrogel only for you and only later add in a progesterone.

I hope the wedding goes well.

[Hurdity]

Hi Ruthio77

  from me too.

From what you have said - actually I would wait a while before getting another Mirena fitted - the main reason being that you mentioned children and a new husband. If you have a Mirena fitted (+ patches or gel) or go onto a combined contraceptive pill - then that will continue to provide contraception and you will never know if you could have had any more children or not.

Some women who have a premature menopause do find that the ovaries can spontaneously revive at least for a short time. I think you should be able to find information about this on the web.

Therefore - if you are happy to let nature take it's course - I would actually start cyclical HRT - because you definitely need the oestrogen at your age, which will bring about a monthly withdrawal bleed. In that case you could decide not to use any contraception and just see what happens. You may well be fully and permanently post-menopausal - but you could perhaps carry on like this until say age 42 or 43 when you might decide that you would prefer to restart a Mirena and stop the bleeding.

This is just a suggestion based on the things you said and not intended to build up your hopes in anyway - but just not to help close that door forever by resuming the Mirena.

I agree with Mary G that you may like your doc to prescribe oestrogen only for say 6 weeks before introducing the progesterone - which will give your body time to adjust to this hormone having been depleted for a while. However if you are going away on Sunday and are coping fairly well then maybe wait until after your honeymoon in case you suffer temporary side effects (depending on how long you are going away) - but really you should not be without oestrogen for much longer.

As a matter of interest did the doc test your oestrogen levels too? It would be interesting to know what these are?

Hope this helps and do let us know what you decide.

Hurdity x