It is so hard when we feel so rubbish and we can't find the solution
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I can only suggest what I think I suggested before and that is to stop HRT for a good few months. I really do believe that if you were having a regular cycle then perhaps you didn't need HRT - I am not taking it as you know, so I know I probably don't understand quite how it can be used at various stages of menopause. I do think that hot flushes and dryness are clear indicators for it and that sometimes, as in my case, these have happened but not remained. So I am thinking the best bet for some is to wait until symptoms are ongoing and enough to cause interference with everyday life.
I DO appreciate you are having symptoms that are interferring with life and have done for some time, I still think that it isn't clear HRT is the solution at the moment and you have wondered this yourself too. To give things a chance without might help you tune into yourself 'au naturel' and see
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It doesn't sound like the AD's are helping, maybe you could try different ones?
I appreciate my view isn't your chosen path right now. You sound so unsure about it all and in truth I think that you are trying to manage a really complex thing - changing body chemistry. My suggestion is based on a simpler approach which personally, with anxiety issues, I find easier to deal with x