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[SadLynda]

Good Point CLKD, she does have plenty of other friends and one family member that visits often.  Quite right, she is not my responsibility.  Think I will just leave it now and kill the guilt. 

[CLKD]

Then I get to thinking what if she has asked everyone else and I'm the last one  ……… but I know that this particular person has regular interaction ………..

[SadLynda]

yes there is that, but again 'not our responsibility' ours is caring for ourselves, as my Aunt is fond of saying "If you dont look after 'you' no b&&ger else will"

[Dorothy]

Isn't there a respite club in your area Dorothy where you mum could go so that you could have a day to yourself? Does she live with you or do you have to stay at her house every day for that length of time?

Taz x

I live with HER!!!  And yes, that IS as tough as it sounds.    She's very determined as to who she will and won't visit/have in her home, but isn't bad enough to have things imposed on her.  So if the people she is happy to spend time with won't stay with her, it's down to me.  I did have most of the day out to visit friends today though, so can't complain.  And she didn't ring me either...usually, once I've been away for more than an hour or two, I get constant texts and calls, but I don't want to switch my phone off in case of emergency!

[Suzi Q]

I have got to the point when if I say 'no' I mean that - I don't then want to go into great long explanations as to why!

Anyone else fell that 'no' should be accepted without rigmarole?

Or is it that people want to know that they aren't the cause of my saying 'no' ….. that they haven't upset me or are the direct cause?  Sometimes Himself will start querying why I've been negative and I get quite ratty  "which bit of 'no' don't you understand?" 

Yes but it ain't gonna happen  xxx