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[Bettyboo]

First, I wanted to say how helpful I find this forum. I've been spending a lot of time lately and there's always someone with the same or similar symptoms or experiences. I noticed that a lot of us suffer from health anxiety. Because of this I have a lot of difficulty distinguishing between whether something is a genuine meno symptom or something in my head (or a genuine illness – but let's not go there…). Sometimes I think I can bring on some of the symptoms, especially the ibs-type stuff, just by thinking about them.

At the moment I feel that meno rules my life. I never know how I will feel from one minute to another – for example, yesterday I felt really good in the morning, went shopping, no pains, then after lunch two sudden ibs-type attacks and I was grounded – too scared to even take the dog round the block. This is really getting me down.

How is it for others? Is everyone getting on with normal life, or do you think about meno every day? Does it stop you doing stuff? I think I need to go back to the Dr but I don't really know what to say. I kept a record and I think this shows that some of the symptoms fluctuate cyclically and others will be around for a few weeks and then disappear only to return a few months later.

Sorry to seem so miserable – fed up today 

[Galadriel]

Hi Bettyboo,



There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about the changes going on in my body. Like you, I can go from feeling fine and dandy to grotty... almost as if a switch has been flipped.

I still do stuff, in fact things like my yoga class and my evening class, keep me going. I've noticed that when I'm immersed in these activities, I feel fine.

The things that send me into an upward spiral of anxiety are the really odd symptoms and bodily changes... my GP said to me that if anything bothers me that much, I should come to see him. I replied that if I did that, I'd never be away from the surgery

Given that oestrogen receptors are found in practically every bodily system, it shouldn't be so much of a surprise that we experience such weird and wide-ranging symptoms during perimenopause. This is, of course, my logical brain thinking, but it doesn't stop the worry . It's a bit like being re-wired and having our bodies adapted to run on a different fuel mix.

I'm now really enjoying the times when I do feel on top of the world so that I can recall them when I'm in a pit of despair, and remember that I'll find that ladder and climb out of the pit again.

Sorry - gone into rambling mode... is this another peri symptom? 

Galadriel x

[SadLynda]

I spent over 3.5 years like this, not about meno as until last year I did not realise that was what was wrong with me, but one symptom after another was ruining my life and that with the lack of sleep affected me very badly.

Now I got the AD's from my GP my life is back on the 'up'- just as well really as my parents are both ailing and the DH is not well either, so currently more worried about them.

[coldethyl]

It certainly seems that way. I've always suffered from panic attacks and anxiety but it is through the roof since hitting the peri. Last few months I've never been away from a and e with chest pain - that seems to have settled but only because it's now been replaced by worrying about my BP since it went up last weekend with an adverse drug reaction. It was fine on Monday,but I've convinced myself a stroke is imminent! ( Mr Ethyl has made me put the monitor away as he said, and I'm sure he is right, that I am only feeding the anxiety,but I miss my crutch.) My GP told me they'll keep an eye on me and I go at end of month, but I don't think she realises that only seeing them every day would be enough for me at minute! It sucks but at least coming on here makes you realise that you are not alone.

[CLKD]

Anxiety rules every waking moment 

[Bettyboo]

Oh thank you so much for the replies - don't feel quite as mad or alone now 

[elainewin]

yes menopause sure takes over you life ,I spent the last 4 years backwards and forwards to drs, blood tests heart monitors, scans ..even thou im 55 and in the last 2 years had unpredictable periods ,they always told me i was no were near menopause, Made me feel like i was going mad and making all my symptoms up.....tried hrt for 9 weeks but it didnt agree and dr wasnt willing to offer me another type ,so im now on fluoxetine and its helping me such a lot,we all have slightly different stories but all need each others support and advice and the great wisdom of great people on this forum .

[wombat62]

Mostly and then throw some gallstones and a messed up digestive system into the mix....whoo hoo..

The thing I hate, is worrying about stuff I never used to worry about especially with health. Is it because we are getting older, we know people who have had yukky stuff happen to them or is it because it's all over the Mail each day and of course Dr Goo.

[Kristy]

I try not to let it rule my life but I can't deny that it has changed my life and I have had to make lifestyle adjustments to accomodate it. Every time I get a hot flush day or night I am constantly reminded of it, when I'm under pressure at work and anxiety kicks in, I am reminded of it. When I sit in one position for too long and my joints and muscles feel stiff, I am reminded of it etc etc.

However, I certainly don't want it to get the better of me, but it is a challenge - some days are easier than others and I just do my best to get on with life as best as I can. I try to keep a smile on my face and enjoy simple pleasures amongst the challenges   

[GypsyRoseLee]

Yes and no. When I am in the depths of hormonal depression/anxiety then it taints everything and anything in my life. Luckily, I don't suffer with any health anxieties , instead I just suffer with generalised very low mood and anxiety.

When my mood is very low, tinged with anxiety, it's constantly preying on my mind and I'm constantly assessing my mood, or having dark thoughts. It's draining and soul destroying, and I absolutely hate and dread it because (irrationally) I am always convinced I will stay feeling this dreadful forever.

But, alternatively when my mood lifts I find it hard to remember how awful I'd been feeling only 48 hours before. I avoid this place because I don't want to be reminded of anything to do with hormones or menopause. I get busy doing all the stuff I let slide when my mood was low and just feel overwhelmingly grateful to feel 'normal' again. And each and every time I am feeling 'normal' I am 99% convinced that I am recovered and my hormones have settled.

It's a very black and white existence. One day I sincerely hope I will wake up and the very first thing on my mind *won't* be my hormones.

[Kathleen]

Hello Bettyboo.

I'm one of those women who can feel relatively normal one day ( ie yesterday ) and a quivery wreck the next day ( ie today ). I declined the offer of a long journey this weekend because I wasn't sure how I'd feel and didn't want to risk feeling anxious away from home. I actually wanted to go but my symptoms unnerve me so much that I have lost my confidence, so yes, the menopause does rule my life and I hate it.

You are neither mad nor alone!

Take care.

K. 

[coldethyl]

Hello Bettyboo.

I'm one of those women who can feel relatively normal one day ( ie yesterday ) and a quivery wreck the next day ( ie today ). I declined the offer of a long journey this weekend because I wasn't sure how I'd feel and didn't want to risk feeling anxious away from home. I actually wanted to go but my symptoms unnerve me so much that I have lost my confidence, so yes, the menopause does rule my life and I hate it.

You are neither mad nor alone!

Take care.

K.

I know exactly what you mean. I used to travel all over on own to see bands but now spend hours fretting whether I'll be ok enough to go into town to bank. I hate having to factor this stuff in- normal anxiety I can do, but this just feels so much more debilitating as it comes out of nowhere x

[matildamouse]

Yes! Absolutely! Want to go and hide somewhere and just be left alone. Want the world to stop while I am sorting my hormones...if it is possible! Sigh...

[Lizab]

It has ruled my life in one way or another for at least 3 years. Before that, I had problems, but nothing I couldn't roll along with. Then I had two summers of constant bleeding and flooding that limited my activities with my kids. And now for the past four or five months, it has drained the life from me mentally, turning me nearly agoraphobic.
But, I've started hrt. I think I'm feeling tiny, gradual improvements. And when I reflect on the hell that this transition has been, I'm proud of having made it this far!  Our bodies endure so much, it's amazing.

[Dorothy]

The anxiety is a pain, but mine comes and goes, and now I've worked out that it is hormonal, I can give myself a good talking to, which calms me down.  I know I'm fortunate not to have suffered as badly as some with this.

The thing I find hardest to cope with is the physical change, which has really knocked my confidence.  I've had to change my style of dressing to accommodate the hot flushes, and that and the way my body shape has changed, I feel like I'm living in someone else's body.  It's a horrible feeling.  I wouldn't say meno rules my daily life, although I've had to make some major adjustments to work round it, but it certainly rules my social life - or rather stops me having much of one!  I went out with a friend last week and the room was so hot, I couldn't stay, I was just dripping.  And one of my best friends is talking about her plans for her wedding & how she wants me to be there, and I am just dreading it.  Last time I went to a wedding, someone took a photo of me without me realising it and posted it on Facebook - I was in the middle of a major hot flush, so there I am on the web, wet hair, dripping face, sweat patches all over my top... Lovely.