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[littleminnie]

I try not to judge other people and their circumstances.  It's impossible to know the exact situation they are in.  Broadband is now a necessity and most benifit forms are accessed online.  Mobiles need not be expensive or have costly plans, especially if they have no house phone. As for Sky, who knows.  Perhaps a family member pays or they have a dish but are not connected.

Yes I know it's very easy to judge and jump to conclusions but I know that sky isn't paid for by a family member and it definitely works and they brag about it.
I wouldn't like them to go hungry or not be able to clothe the family but I do think that luxuries shouldn't be provided. 

[CLKD]

What's a luxury though?  What's old age - for Pension purposes it was 60 for women, 65 for men.  Now all that changed.  The elderly fall into which age bracket exactly? 

For me: luxury is no anxiety attacks, good health, a loving husband, roof over my head, warmth, hot bath water and food.

[littleminnie]

Maybe luxury was the wrong word.   I consider Sky and Broadband a none essential.  People can use the internet at the libraries, and they do not need Sky.

[Sparrow]

Yes well, I tried using the Internet at the library once,  when our service was down.  Turns out I should have booked a week in advance to do so.  Waste of time.

[Yorkshire Girl]

I generally always put something in my Tesco trolley for the food bank collection in store at Christmas. My parents had 4 children and we were not well off, my mum managed household finances very carefully, no food banks in our day. I know you can't know everyone's personal circumstances but those that spend money on top phones for themselves & kids, sky, tablets, gaming consuls etc instead of clothing and feeding their family need re-educating. Even now when I can afford the odd luxury I still refuse to have a top of the range phone, I pay as little as I can on a monthly basis, we don't have Sky or any streaming services & list goes on.

[Sparrow]

You can't generalise all people, who are hard up, in the same bracket can you?  I'm sure most people do the best they can with what they have.

I too came from a very poor family but I would hate to think others judged us because of it.

[Pennyfarthing]

I generally always put something in my Tesco trolley for the food bank collection in store at Christmas. My parents had 4 children and we were not well off, my mum managed household finances very carefully, no food banks in our day. I know you can't know everyone's personal circumstances but those that spend money on top phones for themselves & kids, sky, tablets, gaming consuls etc instead of clothing and feeding their family need re-educating. Even now when I can afford the odd luxury I still refuse to have a top of the range phone, I pay as little as I can on a monthly basis, we don't have Sky or any streaming services & list goes on.

So do I Yorkshire girl.  I often a put a BOGOF item in there if I only need one.  I do this because I feel sorry for the children of people like this, not for the lazy parents. There  was a good example in the paper yesterday. Couple  aged about 26 with 7 kids begging for money on GoFundMe because they cannot pay their bills.  Today the girls mother has said “Do NOT donate money because he will drink it all away or smoke weed.” 

the girl (mother of 3) who used to do my hair was always complaining that she had no money and they were on tax credits yet she could afford to go out for Girly Afternoon Teas at £25 a head, get married in Greece, have Spa days and take her kids to expensive theme parks.  Never in a million years could I have ever done any of those things at her age.   I think a lot of young people today EXPECT handouts whereas my generation looked after themselves. 

[Yorkshire Girl]

You are so right Pennyfarthing. My parents scrimped & saved to take us to Thorpe Park & Chessington 35 odd yrs ago it was a summer treat once a year, mind you it was a lot cheaper then and Chessington was more a zoo than theme park! This is where re-educating or in PSCHEE lessons children have now they should teach them about finances and educate about the meaning of money. I really do feel for some of the children in today's society.

Shadyglade I did say you can't know everyone's experiences, but I have personally known parents who moan about the cost of something or other & yet they have the newest phone, car etc I could easily have said something but what's the point.

[CLKD]

Food, heat, fresh water, a roof over our heads, access to schooling and medication - essentials. 

I think the 1st World have forgotten what a 'treat' actually might be. 

I met a couple last year whose husband had been made redundant - the Company had done the legally required 3 months consultation period but he hadn't found a job.  3 kids with a good lifestyle, gone in 3/4 months.  They were given advice about extending or altering the type of mortgage, parents were helping out etc. but she had to go to a food bank.  They get enough basics for 3 days each time. 

[sheila99]

Hmm, I think that's a bit dubious. They do have enough money for food, they don't have enough to pay the mortgage or maintain their lifestyle. I'd be cheesed off if I lived within my means in a grotty bedsit and my donation went to someone so they could stay in a fancy house.

[CLKD]

That story wasn't dubious at all, I would never post anything that wasn't true.  The savings were paying the mortgage along with help from the parents.  It isn't why, it's how people get to where they are.  Donations are given per person 3 times I think as well as support to maintain the mortgage, access benefits etc..  All applicants have to be verified by a Government body, people simply don't walk into a food bank and get a box!

I have taken 4 crossword books to Chapel this morning for people who will be in Hospital over the next few weeks.  Knowing how time can drag when having treatment, it seems like a good idea.

[sheila99]

I wasn't trying to imply the story wasn't true, I'm sure it was. I was saying it's a bit dubious them receiving charity food. They could have fed themselves but they chose to spend it on the mortgage instead.
 My parents grew up in war time Britain and knew how hard it was for people before the welfare state. I guess their outlook rubbed off on me. I took my mortgage out over a 12 year term and paid it off in 7 so when they were going to make me redundant I had no debts. There are far too many people who spend a lifetime living on borrowed money. It would frighten me to think I hadn't got a reasonable back up in the bank.

[CLKD]

sheila99 - I don't get your argument. 

If their mortgage wasn't paid, they would have been made homeless within 6 months.  Parents had no room for a family of 5. Banks etc. will snatch back property B4 too many debts are raised on it.

Is that better for a family of 5 2 B in box City than applying for food?  Emergency food access was essential for this family.  As I stated, 1 cannot have more than 3 boxes at a time, dependant on the Charity involved  - each box is enough for 3 days' support and made up according to the needs of the household.  It helped this family fill a gap at a time of need.

The upheaval of kicking out a family is HUGE.  Movement from schools/friends/health care ........

I have always been a saver  and always look for bargains in the sales etc..  People helped me whilst I was growing up so I like to give something back.  We weren't able to get into Debt.  When DH applied to join a bank as a Student he had to have a reference! same with the mortgage application which we took out over 25 years.  Now mortgages are likely to be 30+ years ........... credit wasn't as easily bought when I was growing up. 

[Pennyfarthing]

I remember many A Christmas when My kids were small when I used to sit up till past midnight finishing off knitted dolls clothes and teddy jumpers as gifts for them.  They got loads of secondhand lego which I washed and put in big decorated boxes and they never queried anything. I used to go to some brilliant jumble sales and got lovely toys.  I remember buying a Britain's Farm yard and all the animals in perfect condition for about £1 and they played with that for years. I also bought loads of board games and jigsaws, some still wrapped.  We just didn't have the money to buy expensive things and we never, ever overstretched ourselves. 

[CLKD]

PF - same in our family.  Apparently my sister hated 2nd hand stuff but it never bothered me.  Loved something new ........ as toys were a treat and not a daily happening.