This is my first post and I really don't know what's going on. Here goes...around Christmas time I felt a lump in my left armpit and an aching around that area. I didn't tell anyone but got where I didn't know what I was feeling - lumps and lumps and lumps. I started to think I would soon pass away and not see my youngest go to high school, the summer etc. I felt guilty when I spoke to others about day to day things and I forced myself to go to the doctors in June. The doctor couldnt find a lump but said if the pain carried on to go back. I told my husband (after me having a bit of a meltdown about it) and I went again in July and saw a different doctor who also said there is no lump. But she wanted to know about the pain so arranged for bloods and ecg scan (to illuminate heart). The pain was happening more around my left breast, down my forearm and tingling in my fingers. I've an app on Thursday to discuss the results but the surgery have phoned to say I'm deficient in vit d. Now, aswell as this I have realised I haven't had a period since 22nd august, my 45th birthday. I wondered menopause? I found this forum and have read loads and for a few years I've become anxious of holidays, parents passing away, children growing up, feeling guilty, palpiations, fuzzy head, feeling zonked out like I'm not really there, wondering what the point in life is if we are going to die anyway, confusion, forgetful, paranoid that I'm rubbish at my job and everyone thinks I am etc. I've also for the last 2 weeks woke once a night throwing the quilt off. So, I'm wondering if it is happening to me andmaybe the ache and tingles are connected ? Sorry for the long intro, but if it's not menopause then i dont know.