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[GypsyRoseLee]

The title says it all recently 

For the last 11 days I have been crippled with such a horrible low mood and anxiety. It ruined the last 3 days of our holiday. I have cried on my husband's shoulder several times because I felt so dreadful. Have barely been able to bring myself to even smile at my own children. Just so debilitating. It's possibly been caused by poor absoprtion of oestrogen due to a spray tan, or possibly not (still waiting for a reply from manufacturers).

Yesterday was so bad. Was stuck at work and in lots of meetings but just sat there in silence, too depressed to communicate or contribute. Then at 6pm precisely I felt like a huge weight lifted off my chest and a rush of 'lightness' replaced it. Really odd sensation. I suddenly felt physically incredibly drained and feeble, but my mood felt so much lighter and brighter. I could suddenly smile at collegues and join in with the conversation again. Several of them commented 'you've perked up Gypsy' 

Honestly, the change in mood really happened that swiftly. I don't know why? Maybe my oestrogen levels finally reached the beneficial level, after having to build up again over the last week?

Just wanted to say a very, very big thank you to everyone who has been so kind and supportive over the last 11 days. You have helped far more than you can ever know 

[Annie0710]

That's incredible ! I'm so pleased you're feeling better, it's heart wrenching reading sad posts where women have crashed down with emotions , I get blips and hope to god nothing lasts long

Annie xx

[Chi chi]

  hope it continues for you 

[Joyce]

 

[dogdoc]

Yup. It's like there is a switch in my brain. I can go from a sobbing, desperate mess to normal in a heartbeat, and then back again. I can see why women at this stage of life get diagnosed with bipolar illness. I feel like I am some days, but nope. It's 'just' the hormones.
Tara

[toffeecushion]

Long may it last

[Limpy]

So pleased you're feeling brighter 

[CLKD]

 

[Hurdity]

Great news GypsyRoseLee - it has to be hormones!
Hope you continue to feel better 

Hurdity x

[Briony]

Brilliant news. Really pleased for you xx     

[Greenfields]

Fantastic! 

[GypsyRoseLee]

I know it sounds utterly fantastical, but it genuinely happened that fast. It has happened this quickly several times before. Whilst on holiday it came on me in less time than it took to rinse the shampoo out of my hair in the shower. But this has been just about the longest and most severe stretch of 'down days' that I have experienced since starting this peri journey. I was getting so scared.

I can't tell you all how massively relieved I am to be feeling better. I was starting to think that maybe I was reacting adversely to the HRT, and that I was going to be one of those women for whom it actually increases anxiety/depression (I have read that this can happen?).

I'm really hoping that my extreme reaction was due to the spray tan affecting oestrogen absorption PLUS then going onto progesterone without any supportive 'buffer' of oestrogen in my system.

I'm not scientific, so does anyone know if taking 200mg of Utro a day, when your oestrogen has become very depleted over a whole week is likely to cause increased depression/anxiety?

[CLKD]

Can't help with HRT dose etc. but so pleased that you are feeling better.

Now: don't take on too much too soon!  Enjoy your new feelings but don't burn up any energy gained 

[GypsyRoseLee]

I promise I won't CLKD.

I had a very peaceful day today wandering around coffee shops and garden centres with my Mum and godmother. And tonight DH is out so I am planning an early night with a book 

[CLKD]

Isn't it lovely to feel 'within normal limits' again.  Every time I go shopping/out for the day/holiday without anxiety I take time to pause and really enjoy it.  Last week depression was bad and I got scared …….. that it wouldn't lift and that I would become unsafe and at what point do I tell DH - no good both of us being scared  …….