Oh Jacky, I am sorry you feel so bad about it. I used to feel as you do when I was younger, I guess I've had so long to get used to it and, to be honest, worse things have happened to me since so it's faded into the background. I think perhaps you have it worse than me as my main aim in preventing the build up, apart from not having pain or infection, is to keep the clitoris from becoming buried. I was warned about this by the dermatologist years ago. Can the GP not refer you to a gynae to see if there is any way your clitoris can be unburied? My inner and outer labia fused together back in my twenties but that's not a huge problem for me. Well, put it this way what you don't have you don't miss.
I am intrigued that 6 months of leaving it alone has not led to a huge build up. If I leave it for a week there is a build up. I daren't leave it alone. When I was googling some years back I found some info from an american site where it was recommended to manoeuvre the area around GENTLY in warm water for ten minutes each day. I started off doing that but then realised that I didnt need to do it every day, or for ten minutes.
Tight trousers are an absolute no-no for me. I always wear loose ones. Also, I never wear tights.