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[Poppysnanny]

Hello - I'm new here and desperately need to unload.  Been going through it for nearly two years now and really struggling.  Night sweats are unbearable - see every hour on the clock every night - last night threw the towel in and got up at 3.00 am.  I'm completely exhausted and really struggling to cope in a stressful job.  Every joint and bone in body hurts and gets progressively worse as the day goes on.  Can't have hrt because of family medical history and full hysterectomy at 39, tried some other med that gp prescribed but made me sick.  Been prescribed NSADs for joints and bones but they make me sick.  GP says nothing more to be done, no one to talk to and husband getting sick of me always being tired.  Feeling sorry for myself but rant over - I guess I'll just have to put up with it and wish my life away until it ends, or retirement - whichever comes first!!

[CLKD]

   you sound about 'normal' …….. as for your GP telling you 'nothing more to be done' - change your GP.  There is a LOT that can be done.

First of all, have you been told by a medic that you can't have HRT - or is it your assumption due to a family history: or what exactly.  My view is quality over quantity  …….

Have a browse round of the menus, top of screen.  As for your husband    …… find him a hobby …….

[Poppysnanny]

Thanks CKLD - yes professional medical advice re HRT, family history of BC plus congenital heart disease.  Been trying to get my hubby to get a hobby but it's really hard - 35 years married with joint varied interests that we've always enjoyed together but now I am too exhausted to even have a conversation most days - keep sending him to my daughter byt she sends him back!!

[CLKD]

I had BC but would insist on treatment if necessary.   How close are the family connections and did they die from breast cancer?  Lots of more recent research has turned some suggestions over ……… and HRT has improved so much it may be worth while asking again.

If there is congenital heart disease surely the heart needs protection  ……… have a browse of the menus 

Keep posting!  There is a 'note for husbands' on here too 

[Taz2]

Hi poppsnanny - welcome to the forum.

I'm so sorry that you weren't offered HRT when you had your full hystectomy at 39. The risks from  HRT don't begin until after the normal meno age of around 51 and far from congenital heart disease meaning you couldn't take it - HRT before the normal meno age protects your heart and bones. I'm not sure how old you are now.

Sorry to hear about your breast cancer risk too. Was it two close female relatives i.e. mother and sister or grandmother and were the cancers oestrogen receptive to do you know? This makes all the difference as to whether you can use it it not.

You will find lots of support on here. The night sweats can be very debilitating. As for the aches and pains - low vitamin D can cause this and there are a few of us on here who have been diagnosed with that and are taking supplements. Has your doc ever tested yours. It can make such a difference.

Taz x 

[Poppysnanny]

Hi Taz2 - BC got mum and mat grandmother, I've had 2 lumpectomies and radiotherapy, in 4th year clear - fingers crossed for next check up!! I take vit d, glucosamine sulphate, cod liver oil, evening primrose and other sups.

I have - until now - been going to gym regularly and swimming but GP has told me to stop gym but keep swimming.  He has recommended 30 - 50 mins stretching excersise ex when I get up in the morning followed by staying mobile all day - I'm really trying my best to do this but quite honestly I am so exhausted all the time I'm too tired to do the stretches when I get out of bed because I've hardly slept!! I'm desk bound at work but am working on my boss too reorganise my work so that I can get moving but my boss lacks understanding (ironically female, similar age to me - ty- but showing no signs of struggle with mp!).

Just totally depressed with the whole thing - nighttime is worse.  Dread going to bed and can't wait to get up in the morning, however an hour later hit the brick wall that is exhaustion and don't know what to do with myself,

So sorry for the negativity but feel like I have reached the end of my tether.  Needed this outlet to let it all go because feel so alone!

[Taz2]

Well you're certainly not alone now that you've found us lot.

Taz x 

[MrsMopp]

That sounds really tough  do you work full time?  is there any way you can reduce your hours?

There has to be something that can be done, whether through your GP or referring yourself to a specialised menopause clinic.

You sound totally exhausted by it all, I hope you can get some help soon.

[CLKD]

I can't understand why your GP suggested stopping the gym - it really does depend on what equipment you are using after all. 

Exhaustion can cloud Life itself 

[Joyce]

   Sorry to hear of your struggles with meno. I'd be asking for a meno/gynae referral. There must be something which can help you with your symptoms.  I had hysterectomy mid 30's, 60 next year.  They've been trying to get me off oestrogen for a while due to all the negative publicity regarding cancer etc, but I'd rather have life quality.

[peegeetip]

"Can't have hrt because of family medical history and full hysterectomy at 39."

How silly doc's can be.

If you've had a hysterectomy then here is the good news!

YOU CAN HAVE HRT!

The good part and the thing they have kept really quiet is that if you have a hysterectomy and have HRT (estrogen only) then you are actually less likely to get BC

This has been known about since all the scares on HRT started.
So please inform your doc that they are plain wrong on that front.

As long as your managed/monitored for any heart and blood pressure issues, again no problem for HRT.
The addition of HRT from latest studies has been seen as good for your heart and circulation however the sooner we start HRT the better the results on that front.

Either way there is no reason you can't have HRT.

Hope that gives you some hope there.

 

[GypsyRoseLee]

Hello and so sorry to hear you are struggling.

I would always recommend getting qualified medical advice. But please be assured that GPs DO get it completely WRONG.

I saw a different locum GP a few days ago. She confidently told me that I should wear my HRT patch on my upper torso! When I queried this, she reluctantly looked in her book and was very surprised to read that HRT patches SHOULDN'T be worn anywhere near the breasts.

This is very worrying, as many of her patients are wearing their patches in the wrong place 

Two other lady GPs in the same practice also insisted that I simply COULDN'T be suffering from hormonal depression/anxiety due to being peri menopausal because I was ONLY 43. Apparently, I was still 10 years too young to even be thinking of such a thing.

Their blind ignorance was just astonishing. Because when I finally saw a consultant gynaecologist she assured me that she had treated hundreds of ladies, many younger than me, who were most definitely suffering with hormonal depression/anxiety due to being menopausal.

So, please, please seek a second or even a third opinion. Ideally, try and see a specialist. By the very definition of their title, General Practitioners only know a little bit about a lot of medical issues.

A gynaecologist will, on average, have studied women's bodies, fertility, hormonal problems and menopause issue for at least 8 YEARS more than a GP (who typically will only have done a 3 month rotation on a Obs & Gynae Ward). 

[Greenfields]

Just wanted to say welcome and send a hug - you are in the right place finding this forum - people are so helpful here.

With respect to stretches - if you are exhausted then there are ways of stretching passively - for example there is a yoga practice called restorative yoga which uses props like bolsters and blankets - I've found it very helpful when I'm fragile and low in energy (I'm a trained yoga teacher). But you sound like you've got a LOT on your plate - I'm not working at the moment because I got ill inbetween moving countries whereas you are coping with a stressful job ...

... are there things you could do to alleviate the stress in the short term?  For example, can you afford aromatherapy massage?  Some aromatherapy oils have useful balancing properties for menopausal imbalances.

Can you afford acupuncture?  I found that helped me so much until I got seriously out of balance with stress - but it worked for me for a long time.

Can you afford to see a herbalist?  I haven't explored this option yet as I've just started on the HRT route but it is something I'm looking into if HRT doesn't work.

OR are there any other things you could do in the short term which would take the load off you?  Like paying for a cleaner or going to a counsellor and just talking about how difficult things are or ..... whatever comes into your head that might work for you.

I also second the suggestions about getting other opinions - if you can afford it, maybe going to a private menopause clinic might help?  I don't know where you are based but I've heard good things on this forum about one in Guildford attached to the Royal Surrey County Hospital.

You sound, from your posting, as if you are reaching your limit - I didn't realise when I had reached my limit with the stress I was under - and as a result my nervous and hormonal systems went 'pop' at the same time.  I mention this because I really wouldn't want what happened to me to happen to you - I'm getting better but it's messed up my life properly and things are going to take a while to sort themselves out.

So all this is by way of saying, listen to what your body is telling you and get some help as quickly as you can.

Lots of hugs and love to you xxx 

[CLKD]

How are you?