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Author Topic: Would just like to say...we were blindsided  (Read 16259 times)

sammy

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Would just like to say...we were blindsided
« on: April 21, 2015, 12:09:18 AM »

What is getting me is how women are not even slightly informed as to what they may experience in menopause.  I consider myself well read, informed and capable.  When hot flashes first came, I was nonchalant.  "Menopause", i thought, and figured all was fine.

But when the bad stuff came, insomnia, the palpitations, the racing heart rate, the anxiety that caused me to tremble in fear in my bed, shaking so hard my muscles hurt the next day......this scared me darned near to death.  Because I had no idea what was happening.

My doctor offered Ativan and therapy.  I tried HRT.  Things were up and down.  It was not until I found this site, where I read posts aloud to my husband and said, "look, this is exactly what has happend to me!" That i realized what was happening.  I was not crazy, I was not becoming demented, I did not have heart disease or cancer.  I had menopause, and a rather bad case.

So THANK YOU ladies, who bravely posted your symptoms and struggles.  Thank you far helping me realize what was happening.
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Annie0710

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Re: Would just like to say...we were blindsided
« Reply #1 on: April 21, 2015, 05:41:16 AM »

I always saw menopause as first tapering off of periods, hot flushes and being argumentative

Having had a hysterectomy years ago with no hot flushes and not arguing with random people I thought I had early onset of dementia and that they hadn't found a terminal illness

I was embarrassed being mid 40s , female and not a clue

I've calmed right down since joining here knowing I'm not going doo lally
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honeybun

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Re: Would just like to say...we were blindsided
« Reply #2 on: April 21, 2015, 06:14:10 AM »

A bit like childbirth don't you think. No one told you just how much that would hurt  ::)

It's not even that the medical profession doesn't tell us, most other women are very quiet about it too.


Honeyb
x
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Annie0710

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Re: Would just like to say...we were blindsided
« Reply #3 on: April 21, 2015, 06:25:33 AM »

At least during childbirth we have medical professionals taking it seriously and constant monitoring

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toffeecushion

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Re: Would just like to say...we were blindsided
« Reply #4 on: April 21, 2015, 06:44:33 AM »

At least during childbirth we have medical professionals taking it seriously and constant monitoring

That's true, at 49 I am still finding it hard for a doctor to even consider menopause let alone help me.
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toffeecushion

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Re: Would just like to say...we were blindsided
« Reply #5 on: April 21, 2015, 06:46:59 AM »

What is getting me is how women are not even slightly informed as to what they may experience in menopause.  I consider myself well read, informed and capable.  When hot flashes first came, I was nonchalant.  "Menopause", i thought, and figured all was fine.

But when the bad stuff came, insomnia, the palpitations, the racing heart rate, the anxiety that caused me to tremble in fear in my bed, shaking so hard my muscles hurt the next day......this scared me darned near to death.  Because I had no idea what was happening.

My doctor offered Ativan and therapy.  I tried HRT.  Things were up and down.  It was not until I found this site, where I read posts aloud to my husband and said, "look, this is exactly what has happend to me!" That i realized what was happening.  I was not crazy, I was not becoming demented, I did not have heart disease or cancer.  I had menopause, and a rather bad case.

So THANK YOU ladies, who bravely posted your symptoms and struggles.  Thank you far helping me realize what was happening.

I agree with your post totally and could have written it myself.

I read a lot of the posts out loud to my husband to let him know I am 'normal'.  I am also so very thankful for the ladies that share their stories on this and other websites.  I dread to think what kind of place I would be in without them.
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jedigirl

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Re: Would just like to say...we were blindsided
« Reply #6 on: April 21, 2015, 06:48:18 AM »

I feel quite bitter about what I went through to get a peri diagnosis.
 Despite having a high FSH and irregular periods and moods I still went through colonoscopy, endoscopy, mri,numerous blood tests, smears, x rays, ecgs you name it. Every time I became more fearful of what they would find, to the point I would retch when a letter with NHS envelope came in the post. I know ALL my symptoms are fairly typical perimenopause allbeit they arrived fairly dramatically. I'm not sure I'll ever feel the same way about my health now.
 I find it astounding that women don't talk to each other about it. At work we've talked at length re childbirth, sex, periods etc. Is menopause really any more taboo? I've since realised two other ladies at work at going through similar things and are thankful to be able to chat about it! ::)
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toffeecushion

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Re: Would just like to say...we were blindsided
« Reply #7 on: April 21, 2015, 06:54:32 AM »

I feel quite bitter about what I went through to get a peri diagnosis.
 Despite having a high FSH and irregular periods and moods I still went through colonoscopy, endoscopy, mri,numerous blood tests, smears, x rays, ecgs you name it. Every time I became more fearful of what they would find, to the point I would retch when a letter with NHS envelope came in the post. I know ALL my symptoms are fairly typical perimenopause allbeit they arrived fairly dramatically. I'm not sure I'll ever feel the same way about my health now.
 I find it astounding that women don't talk to each other about it. At work we've talked at length re childbirth, sex, periods etc. Is menopause really any more taboo? I've since realised two other ladies at work at going through similar things and are thankful to be able to chat about it! ::)

I am sure all my symptoms are perimenopause but I still have a low FSH so at the back of my mind I worry that maybe the doctors are right and it isn't menopause.  I dread a visit to the doctors and make myself so ill with the worry of going.
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Joyce

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Re: Would just like to say...we were blindsided
« Reply #8 on: April 21, 2015, 06:54:52 AM »

My mum told me that giving birth was as painful as a period pain! Now mine were pretty painful, but nothing like caesarian sections.

As for menopause, she told me periods could get worse before they got better & there may be some hot flushes.

Little did I know.
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toffeecushion

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Re: Would just like to say...we were blindsided
« Reply #9 on: April 21, 2015, 06:57:48 AM »

My mum told me, and still does today, that menopause will happen at 54 and not before.  So all you lovely ladies out there, if you are under 54 it isn't the menopause ;).  I know, cos my mum said so.
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HorsesHorses

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Re: Would just like to say...we were blindsided
« Reply #10 on: April 21, 2015, 07:02:49 AM »

Well said Sammy, spot on! I try and talk about it lots to help change this silly 'taboo subject' rubbish it still has. One of my colleagues now couldn't be more informed about what's possibly heading her way and she's only 26 haha. It's tricky trying to inform but not scare though.
This site and the bravery of everyone sharing their stories is a godsend.
xx
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jedigirl

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Re: Would just like to say...we were blindsided
« Reply #11 on: April 21, 2015, 07:04:55 AM »

toffeecushion

FSH levels can vary, a low or normal  FSH doesn't mean you're not peri, symptoms are a better indicator
Have at look at this link
http://www.healthline.com/health-blogs/hold-that-pause/lab-tests-diagnosing-perimenopause
JG x
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toffeecushion

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Re: Would just like to say...we were blindsided
« Reply #12 on: April 21, 2015, 07:16:48 AM »

toffeecushion

FSH levels can vary, a low or normal  FSH doesn't mean you're not peri, symptoms are a better indicator
Have at look at this link
http://www.healthline.com/health-blogs/hold-that-pause/lab-tests-diagnosing-perimenopause
JG x

Thanks Jedigirl, I'll still worry ;D though
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jedigirl

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Re: Would just like to say...we were blindsided
« Reply #13 on: April 21, 2015, 07:21:04 AM »

I know, I can worry about whether I've forgotten something I should be worrying about!  ;D
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Kathleen

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Re: Would just like to say...we were blindsided
« Reply #14 on: April 21, 2015, 08:46:34 AM »

Hello sammy.

Another victim here!

I had no idea what was coming my way and when my doctor first mentioned the menopause I bought a book and was frankly shocked at what I learned. When I read the list of possible problems I thought " this is like being really ill with some all consuming disease".
Sometimes I still feel that way.

As for a taboo subject, not in my world! I talk menopause to all and sundry and everyone knows I'm struggling.  My mother was from the generation of "least said, soonest mended" and that attitude has never sat well with me.

This site has helped me so much and I value the comfort and wisdom I get from all the ladies here. Thank you all.

Wishing everyone a good day today. Take care.

K.
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