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[CP]

Hi,
apologies if this message shows twice, it didn't look like it had worked the first time.
Yes my sister is younger than me and yes i would miss her if this never got sorted but i couldn't go on with the same old situations arising after all the years me and my husband have spent helping her out and letting her live with us on many occasions. (It's a long story!!).
I took my time with the letter and wrote it with as much consideration to her feelings as i possibly could, i only put things in it relevant to what had been bothering me. I knew it would make her angry and upset, none of us like to hear things about ourselves but i had hoped she could be more bothered to sort it quicker than she has which kind of proved a point I had made about how family is bottom of the pile to her when her life is going well.
I am grateful for all the advice and comments given to me, it feels good to have somewhere to write things down and get it off your chest. Part of the problem for me is i want to go to the docs about how i feel but i have been twice already and here in the UK while the NHS is brilliant a lot of our GP's do not go all out when you see them especially when it comes to hormone related things. Two different docs have said i may be in pre-menopause and only because of family history. Their advice is to see how it goes.
A lot of them don't seem to want to give blood tests or do much (not in my experience anyway) and i personally feel i go in and self prescribe what i think may be wrong and they just agree. Right now i have woken up feeling the need to wee constantly, after having period like cramps every day since my last period, it is not the first time this has happened but by the time i get an appointment it will probably be gone again!!
I do write down symptoms on a planner to see any patterns and will take it to the docs at some point if things get a lot worse.
I did get help with the Emetophobia, CBT which did nothing and i never got any follow up, i also had counselling but couldn't afford to keep it up, i hate it and it does get me down but what can you do??
Anyway that's going on to other issues......thank you so much for your advice and replies, it has made me feel i am not alone. x

[CLKD]

CP - there is a thread here about emitophobia  which took over my Life for years 

Your need to wee may well be the beginnings of vaginal atrophy ……. something that can be treated.  Also if you are in peri some form of HRT should be discussed with you as your heart and bones need protection. 'see how you go' in NOT acceptable!!!   Have a read of the menus, left of screen and take notes.  You could ask your local Pharmacist which Practice is 'better' at prescribing HRT  …. they have private rooms for discussion.

As for your sister - maybe a follow-up letter saying that you understand that your words may have been upsetting but that some issues need to be faced up to 

[Lynjane]

I really feel for you CP, I too have a sister, who is younger than me (I'm 63), whom I have done things for and looked after for most of her life! She also is extremely self centred and if a conversation is not about her/of interest to her, she will interrupt or switch the subject without a second's thought! I was beginning to feel it was just me, but having had a family 'pow wow' after a particularly bad example of her selfishness and downright dangerous stupidity, I realise that everyone (including her daughter) is aware of this unacceptable behaviour. We all love her and want the best for her, (she's been unhappily single for some time) but it's hard to know how best to approach her...I know if we sent her a letter WW3 would probably break out, so we continue to try and steer her as best we can, and actually tell her when she's particularly out of order...but it's as if she sees a completely different story to the rest of us! 😡

[CLKD]

Old Habits die hard!  Lynjane - stop trying to guide her.  She's a big girl now and used to 'working' others to her advantage.  Stand back.  You have your own Life!

She may well be narsasccistic [sp] when, however much you try, she will go her own way