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Menopause Matters magazine ISSUE 76 out now. (Summer issue, June 2024)

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Author Topic: How Can I Accept Me For Me?  (Read 6753 times)

SueRoe

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Re: How Can I Accept Me For Me?
« Reply #15 on: March 24, 2015, 12:52:02 PM »

No bugsbunny, you're not alone. I sometimes look at very slim women of our sort of age and wonder what they have to do to stay that way - deprive themselves of all sorts of lovely things probably. Recently I read an article in The Times about a woman whose home went up in flames and she lost everything except what she was wearing and what she had in her handbag. She had had to go out and buy replacement clothes. She was writing the article several weeks after the fire and the message she had was that it was so liberating no longer opening her wardrobe to be faced with racks of clothes that didn't fit anymore. She had a few new things that fitted and life was simpler because of it. I think we all hang on to stuff for when we lose that weight and continue to wear things that are uncomfortably tight ( I get in a right nark if my clothes are uncomfortable!). Why do we do this to ourselves?
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CLKD

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Re: How Can I Accept Me For Me?
« Reply #16 on: March 24, 2015, 01:43:59 PM »

Hope? ………… I have certain 'sets' of clothes and jewellery, currently I'm looking for bright jeans that actually fit  :( …….. to go with tops I hope will be worn if we get a Summer!
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Dulciana

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Re: How Can I Accept Me For Me?
« Reply #17 on: March 24, 2015, 01:46:41 PM »

Honeybun is right about colouring, too - if you can also find out what your new colour palette is (all part of the fun!), then your "new look" is probably just round the corner!   (Ages ago, I trained and worked as an image consultant, and while this is way in the past, I still believe we can all look wonderful, at any age!) 

Dulciana - Re colours - I had my colours done, ooh, must be about 20 years ago. In your experience, do our colours change much when we hit meno?
I don't think it's specifically at meno-time, but everyone's colouring changes as the years pass.  My colouring has definitely lightened and I'm now definitely better in lighter shades of what used to be "my colours". 
Cubagirl, I'm interested to hear that your colouring has changed from fair to medium beige (I assume you mean skintone), as I had always thought that it just lightens.   Glad your new foundation was "the one"!
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thorntrees

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Re: How Can I Accept Me For Me?
« Reply #18 on: March 24, 2015, 02:04:42 PM »

Was only web searching today about advice re colours make up etc and e- mailed eldest DD about us both going for a consult sometime soon. She is 43 and me 65 so thought it good time for both of us- Mum will pay of course. Any ideas on where to go would be most welcome. Looked at the Colour me Beautiful site so far., there are a couple of places close to her in Cheshire.
Any advice ladies?

Thorntrees.
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CLKD

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Re: How Can I Accept Me For Me?
« Reply #19 on: March 24, 2015, 02:10:39 PM »

What a great idea!  Try John Lewis or ask at a cosmetics counter?  Does 1 start with the skin tone or clothing?
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thorntrees

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Re: How Can I Accept Me For Me?
« Reply #20 on: March 24, 2015, 02:25:35 PM »

Thanks CLKD, I know they do make overs in various dept stores but was thinking of something a bit more personal than sitting in public but will keep that in mind, there is definitely a large Debenhams store in Chester so might be worth a look see.
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Dulciana

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Re: How Can I Accept Me For Me?
« Reply #21 on: March 24, 2015, 02:49:34 PM »

Thorntrees, if you could get a consultation where they do a personalised system of colour analysis- as opposed to a seasonal one (spring, summer, autumn, winter) - you would get an individualised colour swatch to come away with.   
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Joyce

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Re: How Can I Accept Me For Me?
« Reply #22 on: March 24, 2015, 04:17:17 PM »

Yes skin tone Dulciana. I think it has more to do with weathering. My mum was the same. Certain colours she wore in her youth, drained her as she got older. I used to wear lemon a lot, it was my favourite colour. My hair was more auburn in those days. Nowadays coral suits me best, as my face & hair colour have changed.
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CLKD

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Re: How Can I Accept Me For Me?
« Reply #23 on: March 24, 2015, 04:18:01 PM »

I feel a meno charabanc trip coming on  ;D
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Dancinggirl

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Re: How Can I Accept Me For Me?
« Reply #24 on: March 24, 2015, 06:14:18 PM »

When I was a Presentations Consultant I did colour analysis but I did the personalised colour sessions - the seasonal thing is too restrictive. My view is that you really can wear any colour but it is the way you wear colour that is important. It's good to have key basics like trousers, skirts and jackets in neutral shades like dark grey, navy, brown or beige and then use colour alongside as a contrast in a blouse, t-shirt or scarf etc.
As we age wearing slightly softer shades of colours can be more flattering but do beware of going too beige and bland.  A big mistake that many women make is when dying their hair - if you had really dark hair that has gone grey don't try to dye it the colour it was when you were young, go for highlights in softer tones that are more flattering for the skin.
Fit is very important and I think comfort is vital.  It's no good wearing an expensive outfit that really suits you and then wearing shoes that are painful!
My top tip: go through your wardrobe, try things on, if something suits you and you've always felt good wearing this, try to work out why it works. When you next go shopping for clothes - you should never buy anything without trying it on first - you will look at yourself in those ghastly mirrors in the changing rooms, instead of seeing all your lumps and bumps, look dispassionately at whether the item is flattering or not - does it hide the areas you don't like and does it enhance your good bits? Crucially do your feel good in it. 
Many make up girls on the cosmetic counters in stores are trained quite well on colour so it's worth asking advise there.  Many stores have wardrobe consultants as well so I'd ask about that as well.
If you shop with a friend or relation don't let them talk you into buying something they like - it's probably their taste and not yours. Buying rules:  can you wear any clothing item 3 different ways, does it fit well, will it wash well and do you love it.
Enjoy shopping ladies.  DG x
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bugsbunny

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Re: How Can I Accept Me For Me?
« Reply #25 on: March 24, 2015, 06:41:26 PM »

Thanks everyone. I will read all the posts thoroughly and I'm sure I will find good advice and help from you.

It's good to know I'm not alone   ;)
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thorntrees

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Re: How Can I Accept Me For Me?
« Reply #26 on: March 24, 2015, 06:44:53 PM »

Thank you Dulciana and DG, I was thinking of a personal consult and like the idea of a colour swatch etc. Will get  togeher with daughter and see what we can come up with, she's better at web searching than I am so hopefully will find something that will suit us both. My hair is going slowly grey so feel the need for make up changes and a wardrobe reamp to help me accept my post meno self and growing old disgracefully!! If nothing else it will give us both a girlie day out and give me a chance to spoil her.

Thorntrees
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CLKD

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Re: How Can I Accept Me For Me?
« Reply #27 on: March 24, 2015, 06:48:22 PM »

My hairdresser made me 'blonde' once, everyone else liked it except me  ;D ………..

He gave me hi-lights then 3 months later low-lights so it was layers of colour.  Now I'm 'me' - that is, grey on a brown background  ;)
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