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[dulciana]

Okay, it's now seven weeks since our darling little moggie came to the end of her life and I'm still not over her.   I can go along absolutely fine for hours, days, even a week then something registers that sets me back and tears are rolling down my face again.  I can "see" her everywhere I look or go, sometimes -parts of the house, the area outside.  This evening I wanted desperately to be able to cuddle her and hear her purring again.  I taught her to understand things we said: if I said "Just a minute", she would wait exactly where she was and still be there when I had done whatever I had disappeared for a "minute" to do.   "Would you like....?" told her that food was on the way, as did "Fish, fish!". She even knew the word "music" and listened to it with me - I knew she was listening because her ears would move in response.   Oh, she was my wee friend and there's this little, big, soft, fluffy, wide-eyed, loving gap where she was.   
Is this normal??

[honeybun]

Yes very normal. You a grieving for a very much loved companion. It never really goes away completely but in time you will be able to look back and enjoy your fond memories.
I was watching a TV programme the other night. It was about a vet practice. There was an elderly golden retriever that came in to be treated for a sore leg. It had bone cancer and had to be put down. I lost my Goldie over eleven years ago but that brought all the feelings back and I ended up in floods if tears.  Never really goes away but it does get easier with time.

Have you considered another little cat. Nothing can replace what you have lost but perhaps there might be another little cat that could find a place in your heart and home.

 


Honeyb
x

[Dyan]

Yes it is normal dulciana.
I know how you feel having lost 2 cats myself.
They are very much part of the family and we need to grieve.
  for you X

[CLKD]

Yes, Yes, Yes ………… I still ache at times.  It's early for you!  If I find a dish/lead/collar un-expectedly; or see something on TV or remember certain walks, I get all weepy inside.  There are still walks I won't go on  and due to anxiety I can't own pets again  ……….

It took 2 years before I could look at the 'photos.  Don't beat yourself up, this is a huge gap in your routine ……..

[Tabbycat]

I lost my last cat to lymphoma nearly 14 years ago and sometimes I still miss him, despite having two gorgeous cats now. For months afterwards I couldn't walk down the cat food aisle in the supermarket.

You're going through the normal grieving procedure and it takes as long as it takes. Right now, her passing is still very recent and hurts like hell but it will get better, honest! You'll know when you're ready to give another cat a home.

The Blue Cross has a pet bereavement service which you might find helpful: http://www.bluecross.org.uk/1742/losing-a-pet.html

[tiger74]

I work at a vets and would say this is entirely normal.

I was going to mention the pet bereavement service but I see Tabbycat has already done so.

You have my sympathy.  Pets represent a big and important part of many people's lives.

[CLKD]

I still shudder when I walk down the pet aisle .......... I had 4 pets pts within 22 months and I was worn through by the end  ..... it does take time as each one is different and each personality is missed.

They leave paw-prints on our hearts 

I helped myself by every day allowing 20 mins then 10 mins to really think about them ....... the hurt did get less as I focussed on them ....... I light a candle in my heart too

[dulciana]

Thanks everyone.   I do appreciate your kind words. 

[Ju Ju]

 

" Feelings have one ambition; to be felt." Robert Holden.

Just know whatever you feel is ok. Your grief is unique to you.  Ju Ju xx

[dulciana]

Thanks Ju Ju.
D.

[CLKD]

"If it should be that I grow old and frail ……….. "

[ariadne]

My new (well I've had her a couple of years now so not so new) rescue cat is on my lap right now but she's not like my old cat. She's a feisty naughty little thing but my old cat was a darling sweet lady - much like yours. She was the best cat I've ever owned (sorry to my new cat who I do love by the way) and I wish I could have one last cuddle with her. She so loved a cuddle and if I was ever Ill she would stay next to me for hours like a little nurse.

Your sadness is normal, you have lost a loved pet and it hurts terribly 

Ariadne xx

[groundhog]

Our beautiful puss cat lived to 21 years of age.  She was my daughters cat and they literally grew up together.  She was half human and knew us all so well.  My daughters partner run her over . It was terrible - she didn't die but she was obviously badly injured so we had to put her down aged 21 years and 3 months,  we were all heartbroken.  My daughters partner was beside himself - poor boy.  It wasn't his fault but I don't think my daughter ever forgave him - they split up last year,
Pets share our lives and our hearts and everything has a price.  The terrible grief is the price we pay for the unconditional way that they love us. 
Xxxx

[Ju Ju]

Grief comes after the loss of a love, but would you not want to have had that love in your life? As the saying goes,

                  " Better to have loved and lost, than not to have loved at all."

[CLKD]

I often wonder about those words ........... sometimes I feel it would have been better not to have had them, then a happier memory pops up .........  it felt so wrong, going places without the dog; places that she wouldn't have been allowed into or places where she would have enjoyed ..........