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[honeybun]

My mother is increasingly unsafe in her own home.   But.....She will be taken out of her house kicking and screaming.
She will not consider even respite care.


Honeyb
X

[CLKD]

Sometimes people don't get a choice if they fall! hospital then care home so there isn't an option to pick and choose where would be 'best'  it doesn't stop relatives from looking 'in case' the situation arises.

[Limpy]

The term respite.
Who does it apply to.
Is it for the person having the health problems, or is it the carer/s?

Honeyb it's all very well your mum saying she won't consider respite care, has she asked you and your sister?

[honeybun]

It's for both I think. We have managed this year but as time goes on it gets more difficult for one of us to be away. Next year is a different matter but I guess it's a day at a time.
There is also the problem of her dog who is blind and would not manage in kennels.

Yes a day at a time....Just take it as it comes.


Honeyb
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[Joyce]

My mum always told us to make sure to put her in a home, so that we could have a life. Mind you when the time came, she was OK for the 2 week respite care, thought it was a wee holiday. However, it became clear early on during her stay, that there was no way she could live on her own any more. She did become agitated for a while, made my brother & I feel guilty, but neither of us was prepared to take her in, especially with our own families. My brother & his wife both worked as did hubby & I, so no one could look after her as she'd often wander off. She was well looked after & began to really enjoy the company.
Of course all our mums are different & all our own circumstances are different too, but just thought I'd give you a small insight as to how it went with my mum.

[CLKD]

Cubagirl ... my mum has told us that since the year dot  .......however ............

[honeybun]

My mother says the complete opposite. I can't really say I blame her as I have been in a good few homes when my step father was alive. They can be very very sad places. There is always a smell about them.

Although I complain....and I do  ...we will do our very best to keep mum in her own home.

I don't want to end my days in one of those places but who knows what lies ahead.

Cheery little me ...eh.


Honeyb
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[Joyce]

Not sure I would want to go in a home. DD, who is a nurse, did some extra work in homes when training, for extra cash. Told me some not so nice stories. She says she'll check out any homes thoroughly before even contemplating put us in one. However, these things are often taken out of one's hands.

As a nursery nurse, we used to take the children to nursing homes to "entertain" the old folk. I found it very depressing indeed. And you're right HB there's always that particular smell.

[littleminnie]

When you go in one CG make sure it has Wifi and we can talk to you. Lol

[Greyhoundgal]

Probably a PAT-dog then  and I would begin seeking advice as to where this particular care home transfers their clients if not to their own homes.  Also ask at your GP Surgery, speaking to the District Nurses might be a start, AgeUK have leaflets with advice on thsi too.

How are you feeling?

I think it actually belonged to one of the carers   This home is quite large and Mum is on the rehab unit at the moment but they do have other facilities there so it  may be possible that she could stay.  She did say on Friday that being there had altered her impressions of care homes but we'll take it one step at a time.

I'm feeling a lot better thanks, feel like a great weight has been lifted off my shoulders knowing that she's happy and being well cared for

[Joyce]

 Littleminnie 

Marbles might be gone by then. 

[CLKD]

I think it's important that someone else makes the care home decision .......... if the children mention it  but sometimes when it is forced .....