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[watergypsy]

Well Gypsy im glad i came back on the forum , as we have all said, why isnt this talked about more . To be honest i dont think we should be shy of saying whats wrong with us to a lady friend or a man, it is 2013 for gods sake ! There are still women friends that who dont like to talk about it, or luckily they havent suffered, but there is a lot of us that do,  so this is where the forum comes in. I saw the other day on here , someone said enjoy the menopause  well im trying my best ....yeah!!!

[Lucky Stone]

Enjoy huh Not the term I would use. Get through would be more appropriate. Bet better than not having one at all - i.e. dropping off the perch before you are old enough 

[Tingly]

Enjoy 

[Gypsy]

Thank you for all your replies. I'm still trying to understand and figure out how to deal with this new experience and I'm very glad I found this forum! I still intend to be open about it because I'm not ashamed of my age or the fact that I'm a woman. If the people around me don't like it - well my friends are pretty used to me being up front on most subjects.

How do you do all those other smileys?

[honeybun]

If you click on more under the row of smilies you get more to choose from..

Whoever said enjoy the menopause.  Someone hold them and I will. 


 


Honeyb
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[Victoria]

Hi Ladies! I certainly agree about it being a taboo subject. My friends clam up when I mention it and my GP keeps fobbing me off as too young. Im 46 and have felt perimeno for AT LEAST 5 years. My periods have virtually ebbed off although I was never heavy anyway. I now only get the phantom period/pain nothing a panty liner won' t sort out once every 3/4 months.

My mum's periods stopped outright when she was 41. My Mum was brought up by nuns in the 1930's in Ireland and isn't one to discuss many things let alone menopause. My Mum didn't even prepare me for starting my periods but luckily I had older sister to nick stuff from.

Thanks to this website I went to GP and asked for hrt in the form of patch (Femseven Sequi) as had done lots of reading on this Forum. However, apart from patches not sticking, I go mental on the 3rd & 4th week patch. I couldn't take the pill so guess i am progesterone intollerant.

Went back to GP and asked for Oestrogen only patch plus separate Progesterone (again, as per this forum). He admits he isnt sure about HRT & wants to refer me to gynae (good) but have had to come off everything for a month to get a true blood test. Feel like I'm on a roller-coaster, but not a good one. Why does everything have to take so long? Having blood test next week. Any advice would be welcome x

[Suzi Q]

Gosh you are so right Suzi Q, not many people want to hear about it but they'll drone on and on about other things. Sorry your atrophy is playing up, Suzi as you've been an inspiration. If you can do it there's hope for me somewhere. Trying to get my body used to oestrogen cream as I was told to(not making any difference) and coupled with the other pain I just want to sit in the corner and cry, well itch and cry really. You ladies have given me hope and I hope that this blip goes away soon. I just want rid of this pain/itch/foul mood swings so I will keep going until I can use the full dosage of oestrogen. Do you think that it was shaving that caused this blip, Suzi? I will have to give that up too and even here in Oz I shall not worry about my bikini line even in temps of 38 +. I don't think anyone will notice to be honest 

No I had the blip 2 weeks ago last Monday out of the blue jut hit it does that I can check cos since I was 30 Ive kept diaries and read this years Ive had a few blip biy  not this long nearl 3 weeks but as I said in that time about 6 days OK and sometimnes its just bad am and then goes OK or OK all day then evening eww Waters affecting it again had a shower and OUCH and no soap either So Im using my Nilsta around the poutside it does soothe it and YES I think the shaving which I do an almost BRAZILLIAN does irrittate Today it feels like a shaving rash sore and scrathy but my inner labias inside are red raw and the opening is red and sore
Yet put the normal vagi in last nioght and like BUTTER it slid in so OK insiude I thjink
Still got to go on cantg let it get to me got 7hr ride on MBike tomorrow and agan Sunday
Cant let Atrophy ruin my life it hurts throbs and like a suction feeling and sitting down EWWW
So chinm ujp xxx and hope ypou and me feel better asap xxxxxxxxxx

[Delilah]

Ooh suzi that souns painful, lots of padding for that bike ride. I do admire your resilience

When meno hit me like a juggernaut i think spoke to just about everyone i could to try and get as much info as possible.  Any family member and friend i came across got the lot in full detail.  I was amazed that so few had experienced anything like what i was describing.  My mother passed away 8 years ago so we never got around to talking about it, but neither of her sisters had any problems (i rang them for a chat) and none of my friends have suffered too badly either.  They were quite surprised at the horrid symptoms i've had.  However my mum in law and sis in law both had a very difficult time and were more than happy to talk about their experiences with me.

I dont blame women for not talking about it once its over, i cant wait to get this time of my life over and done with and forget about it.  My daughter however has seen how its affected me so is well aware of how bad it can be.  I actually didnt want to frighten her but found it impossible to hide things from her.  She probably wont remember this though in 20 years time but at least i'll be able to help her if she does go through the same.

Delilah x

[Rose]

Hope you enjoy the bike ride, Suzi! You are a braver woman than me  I get sore sitting doing work at the computer! let us know how it went!
Rose.

[Dana]

I can totally relate to what you ladies are saying. Quite a few of my friends are older than me, and when I was going through the worst of my meno symptoms, and I would try to tell them or explain to them what it was like, all I got were blank stares and "I never went through any of that". Were they telling the truth or did they just not want to admit to the fact that they were older than me? Who knows.

I have a friend who is a bit younger than me and has started going though all the hot flushes, insomnia etc. I thought "Great, now's my chance to really help another woman" so I tried to start a discussion with her about what her options were, but I got shot down in flames. She just did not want to know. She could have taken advantage of the fact that I've been there, but she's chosen not to. All I can do is be there when/if she needs any information or support.

I think this "suffer in silence" crap is one of the reasons why there is still so much negativity attached to HRT. Women just don't want to know about it. Well more fool them as far as I'm concerned. I hope it will change with the next generation. Our generation was raised by mothers who were mostly very closed off to personal discussions like this, so in a way that has had a big influence on our attitudes too, but our daughters are more used to being open about things and demanding better opportunities. I hope they simply won't stand for being treated like second class citizens when it comes to hormones problems.

[Rose]

Hi Dana
it's not just the other women that make this a taboo subject. I went to a male doctor plus gynaecologist and they never clicked that my symptoms were due in part to vaginal atrophy. I mean if the medical profession can't even get out of the woods with this subject what hope do we have? My daughters are just hoping that when it comes their time, it will go away with some magic potion. The way things are going, good luck to them!

[Taz2]

My mum talked to me about it a lot when I was around 16 so that I would understand what she was going through. I didn't understand at all. I thought she was making a big fuss and just didn't want to know. She was prescribed HRT as were quite a few of her friends and this worked well for a year before she had to come off. This was in 1970. I can remember feeling embarrassed as she walked around the house in her petticoat and wishing she would just get on with it and not make such a fuss. She used to say "You wait my girl - your time will come". Of course, in my mind, that would never happen I was ME and would stay like that for ever and not let a few little hot flushes change me at all!

I am the oldest person at work and some of the women are just starting to suffer hot flushes. They are just beginning to ask about HRT. A few years ago when I started it at age 53 there was no way they would ever take it and they were determined to go down the natural route.

I am not sure that women will ever really want to take on board the fact that so much of their body and personality will change as they become menopausal. We had a thread running a while back on positive aspects of the menopause and I'm afraid that I couldn't think of any. I liked the person I was. The woman with tons of energy and a fantastic and varied sex life. I liked the fact that I was good at my job, quick on my feet and quick to learn new things. I liked my figure and my hair and my skin and I don't like the fact now that so much effort has to go into just keeping myself looking attractive. I also liked the fact that I could cope in all situations. I know that we have to accept that things change with the reduction of hormones in the body but it is really difficult to do that and not wait for the "old" us to return.  I remember working with a woman who was in her fifties and I was around twenty five and she used to grumble about her husband still wanting to make love when she preferred her knitting. We had quite a few chats about it because I thought she had always been like that but she explained how she used to be very sexual but since she got to her late forties she had "gone right off it" and didn't care if "he never came near me again". Again I was less than sympathetic and thought she was just being mean to her husband. I understand it all to well now of course!!

What I am trying to say is that I did know quite a lot about it but it was still never going to happen to me. I would suddenly wake up "older" at the age of around 90 with a blue rinse and sensible shoes!

Taz x

[Morwenna]

I know that we have to accept that things change with the reduction of hormones in the body but it is really difficult to do that and not wait for the "old" us to return. 

A few women on this forum have talked about 'coming out of the other side' and the 'old them' finally returning. Am I being optimistic when I say I'm living for when this happens to me? Would I need to abandon HRT and let the whole process of 'going through the menopause' take place in order for the 'old me' to return? What if that actually never happens and these women are just forgetting what the 'old them' was like? I tell you, nothing has taken over my world as much as the menopause - I don't go a day without thinking about how it's affecting me in one form or another - and this has lasted three years so far. Is the elusive 'light at the end of the tunnel' actually non-existent? 

[Taz2]

I haven't met anyone who has gone back to being the old them to be honest but they have felt much better as time goes on. HRT allows a lot of the old us to stay intact but as for "coming out of the other side" of menopause, in a completely scientific way, how can you do that i.e. the loss of hormones and go back to being what you were? The hormones don't come back so the actual menopause is something that is with us for the rest of our lives but the horrible mood swings and anxiety of peri meno do tend to lessen from what I have read. It's all about embracing the new us but, like you, I was rather fond of the old me! Which part of it is the most distressing for you Morwenna?

As for it taking over our lives my meno consultant said that although a forum such as this is brilliant we can become obsessed with the meno and let it colour all of what we are doing and saying. It is just part of life, as puberty was part of life, and we should, as much as possible, put it to the back of our minds and accept changes we can't alter while trying our best to get on with life. I probably haven't put that very well.

Taz x

[honeybun]

It would be nice to think that I could go back to the old me but realistically it is just not going to happen.
I have gone back on my HRT again because quality of life was going fast again. It really is prolonging the inevitable and that is sometimes hard to accept.
I did like the old me much better. But there is also the aging process involved too. None of us can stay the same.
It's a lonely journey I think, and a worrying one as at some point HRT will have to stop and there will be nothing to prop us up.

Gosh, doom and gloom or what.

Honeyb
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